Tips on increasing patience with a 2 year old..?

Question

Hey, Ive got a two year old daughter. Sweet, funny, bright.. all kinds of wonderful things. But I have GOT to develop more patience for her.. I know I need to let her try things for herself, IE- putting on her shoes, picking up her own toys, trying to pour her own juice, things like that. Im NOT saying I do everything for her, that isnt the case, its just that Ive noticed I have this "I'll just do it cause it's faster" mentality.. what are some good ways to develop a little more patience with a toddler?? Thanks :)

Answer 1

I had the same problem when my daughter was younger. Then I read that intervening too much when she tried to do things for herself would send the message that she isn't a capable person, which could cause countless problems down the road. Knowing that my constant helping could actually interfere with her development was enough to help me mellow out a little. She's turning out great:)

Answer 2

Whenever I start to get fed up or have a moment where my patience falters I tell my 2 yr old daughter that mommy needs a deep breathe. And we both take a deep breathe and then count to 10 while doing a trance kind of motion like waving our hands occassionally say ooommmmmm. It's just something to relax me and be kind of silly. Sometimes when she notices my temper flaring she says 'momma! (inhales deeply) 1...2...3... it's cute and that makes it even easier for me b/c it's so cute. It's a really good idea to start way ahead of time if you have a scedule too. I tell her to get dressed a good 15 mins before it actually needs to be done and gently remind her if she gets distracted but I let her keep going at it. And it's okay if she asks for help as long as she really is trying and I still don't do it for her just help her get over the bump if she just can't find that pesky hole for her arm to go in that day.

Answer 3

Find times when you can let her help or do it on her own. And when in a rush, find little things to let her do. BUT, don't overwhelm her. If you ask "what do you want to eat" you could be there all night. If you ask "would you like mac and cheese or grilled cheese" then she can make the call but you still get what you want/need. The same with getting dressed-lay out 2 outfits and let her pick. Then let her put on a shirt while you do pants, socks, and shoes. Little steps. Let her carry one small item to "help you" and you take the rest. Little folks just like to feel they are a help to you-that can be in little things. And they like to be independent-again, little ways. As she masters these she will add more and before you know it she will dress herself. Just build in a little extra time if you can since letting her work on things will add about 15 minutes to every task. Good luck!

Answer 4

I know exactly what you are going through.

Whenever the urge to take over arises walk out from the room. You will be surprised to see how dexterous your daughter is. I did that with my son once when he wanted to pour milk by himself and was surprised at how little he spilled.

Patience now is another ball game. I'm at the end of mine too. One trick which works most times is deep breathing and time out for both of us. Whenever the urge to scream takes over I consciously try and postpone it for five minutes and more often than not I can see things more reasonably from the two year old angle by then.

Answer 5

My 2 yo is the same way. I just let him break things down into blocks that he can handle. I know he won't pick up all the toys and books at one time, but he will pick up all the trucks and put them where they need to be, while he's doing that, I do another small task in the room, or in the other room so I don't think about it. If he's putting on his shoes, I put on mine also so I'm not completely focused on how long it takes him to do things.

Answer 6

I have a 2y old also the only thing you can do is take 10 deep breaths and realize that this is all just part of the development and age. And realize that childhood does not last forever, before long we are not the most important person in their life. That is what I do and say to myself when I start to feel really impatient.

Answer 7

If you know you need her to put her shoes on and get her jacket before you leave--tell her way ahead of time-- Then, you can finish getting everything you need together and you won't be standing over her wishing she'd hurry up.

As far as toys go, you should initiate a "one toy at a time" rule. Where, she gets one toy out and plays with it. When she's done with that toy, she has to put it away before she can get another one.

In general, try to distract yourself with things you need to get done, or sit down and take a break! If you let her do these things, she'll get faster at them!

Answer 8

when you're getting ready to do something with her that you know you're going to be inpatient about, take a few moments to take a deep breath beforehand. give her choices if she's being disagreeable. if it's getting dressed, give her a choice of two outfits. do this several minutes before you want her to get dressed. more than a few choices can be overwhelming for a small child. and let her try, you know this. you're going to have to train yourself to allow this. you have many many many more years of just guiding her and letting her figure things out for herself. my suggestion, is just take a deep breath, and try not to control so many things. let her be her own person. you are there to guide and teach her.

Answer 9

Always incorporate extra time into your daily routine to allow your 2yo to do these things. The only other thing that has ever worked for me (because there isn't always extra time) is distraction. Always have something more exciting up your sleeve to temp your 2yo away from the task at hand.

Answer 10

I don't know if this applys to you but when they throw a fit and fuss I pretend like they hurt my feelings and pretend to cry. Aw, it is so cute the reaction sometimes they will stop and look at you so sweet and do whatever they can to stop you from being sad. I tried this with a little boy of about 3 and he started petting my head and tried to console me. It was darling. Good luck with her. ;)