Im having problems with my family. Ever since my father passed away, my mum has changed alot. She is always very bitter and angry. I've tried so many times to talk to her and she just yells at me or doesnt want to talk. I understand she is upset, because i also miss him too. I dont know how to deal with this anymore, i've tried over and over to try and sort things out but she just pushes me away. I really dont know who to talk to about this but i need some advice, i can't deal with stress anymore. Please help : (
2007-01-24 16:53:09 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I am SO sorry for your loss! You're right! She is still hurting from losing her life partner. She's mad at him too for leaving her alone. Your roll is not to make her feel better but to be there when she needs you to help her through it. She may be depressed, which sometimes surfaces as anger. I also don't sleep well without my love of 20+ years next to me, so I imagine she's not sleeping well either. Do you think she would talk to a therapist, priest or clergy? How about her best friends? Look at her network of friends, show her that so many people are here for her and that she can't drive you all away. Reassure her that she's loved and let her work through it. She may just need time... Good Luck! =)
2007-01-24 17:11:57 · answer #1 · answered by DB 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Millions of people suffer losses such as yours--and those same million people will all handle it differently. It is what is called the grieveing process. It can take a long time for some people to recover from the loss---or never get over it. Some people stay long hours at work to avoid going home. Some drink to forget, some cry and get angry. There is no set way to recover except to accept that the death has happened and the loss can and will be difficult. I cannot say not to talk to your mom---but be supportive and give her time---you got your time--she needs hers--she lost the love of her life and the frustration and loneliness is unbearable for her....so she lashes out. Some people never utter a word--some cannot stand to see anyone happy, some can't eat, some can't sleep. Please leave your mom to her own way of grieveing.Relax and finish the process for yourself too. I am sorry for your loss and wish everyone the best in this heartfelt moment.
2007-01-24 17:57:19 · answer #2 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Write her a letter some times a letter is not heard but felt. So you may want to tell your mom how you know she is so sad cause your sad too. Tell her you need her to love you and not bury you along with your dad. Tell her you feel as if she is burring you too. Tell her to please tell you how she feels so that you both can cry together since you both lost someone special. The loss is big for both of you, Tell her you need to be let into her life and that you need her as much as she needs you if she only let you in. I can't say anything that will make you feel better but only tell you that the more you cry the faster it beg gins to heal. I cried for two years straight, and do so still from time to time. now more i remember the good times and even the not so good times but now they make me laugh and it makes me feel good to remember
2007-01-24 17:30:01 · answer #3 · answered by LittleDaisy. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
am real sorry about your loss...its not always easy to lose someone so close...for your problem, talk to someone you really trust(a friend or family)and who will listen and give good advice to you..or a visit to a counselor would be an ideal solution...you simply can't keep the grief inside you'll feel even more miserable as time goes by...
2007-01-24 17:58:43 · answer #4 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your loss. Your mom needs to talk to a counselor, to help her thru her grief. Perhaps there's a local support group for those who have lost a loved one, for her to connect with. Maybe you can call you local help line, or local clinic to advise both you and your mom on where you may go for help. Check your phone book, or perhaps your family doctor, to help you both get some answers to ease your pain.
2007-01-24 17:29:11 · answer #5 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I deal with the same thing, instead i don't bother in talking to my mm...my mom comes around when she need to talk...but she f u c k e d up her life by smoking the grass (wink wink) if you know what i mean... seriously it has affected her my family and especially my health now that i have cancer its worse on me and she doesn't care...let her come to you...she will eventually, it will take time, let her do it, and act like you don't care either.
2007-01-24 17:01:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the lord. Sounds like your mom needs to let the hurt out to. Maybe you could talk with a pastor or a counsler. Hope you find an answer. GOD BLESS!!!
2007-01-24 17:00:57 · answer #7 · answered by THE ACTS OF POWER 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe you should go see a counsellor. There are many out there that specialize in issues surrounding loss and grief. They are the experts and can truly tell you what to do.
Im sorry for your loss.
Good luck!
2007-01-24 16:59:20 · answer #8 · answered by fingerpretty 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey i know how she feels because i have lost my baby not to long ago in sep i lost my baby girl i was 27 week pregnant it just takes time to get over a lost one i know i did i hated my bf for a long time thinking it was his fault for me losing the baby but it wasn't his fault at all it just happen . i talked about it allot to over come it and all my bf dint want to talk allot about it but i needed to talk because i dint want to forget about my baby i even when to a counselor to talk one on one and it help me i hope you got more info
2007-01-24 17:06:14 · answer #9 · answered by jessica b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know someone that your mom talks to, or even confides in, talk to them. It might be that you can reach her through them.
2007-01-24 18:31:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋