Should I tell her that if she doesn't want me back she should not contact me anymore? Or should I ignore her and just move on with my life and talk to her every once in a while? What is the best way to go about this. She dumped me and I don't know why she is contacting me? Is she confused? Is she keeping me on the backburner?
2007-01-24 16:13:49 · 24 answers · asked by D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A: *Whistle* HOLD IT! Let's NOT start a WAR here, we don't want tissues all over the floor, and more confusing thoughts. I broke up with my BF in Hawaii and I just wanted to stay friends. I don't have feelings but I don't want to lose the friendship part of our connection. Cause like MOST people say FRIENDSHIP usually lasts longer than teen love. Trust me it's best that you stay friends cause this guy who is my CLOSE friend used to be my BF but we're still friends. Just let things flow, if you start to lose connection cause either you or her get a boyfriend of girlfriend just let it be... Cause it's just like everything in life, not ALL things stay the same. Like losing a relative, creaking connection with a friend.
In short, enjoy MEMORIES stretched out to the VERY END!
(Aloha and I hope you like the advice!)
2007-01-24 16:34:14 · answer #1 · answered by Hawaiian surf chick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same situation. I don't actively pursue her (ie call her, email, etc) but I do speak to her and reply to her emails that she initiates.
I have had a similiar thought about "being on the backburner", which is alright. Every now and then tell her you are staying overnight "at a friends place", send some mixed signals to her about the possibility of you seeing someone else. See how she reacts to that. If she goes off on a jealous rant, then you are probably in her targets. If not, and she is supportive of your new found "friendship", then I reckon, she is trying to be genuinely nice. Let her. Just don't giver her the impression you are "running" back to her anytime soon. Good Luck, sir.
2007-01-25 00:20:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just be straight up with her or she'll never get the hint. Girls are like that. Being one myself, I have room to talk! It IS likely that she is now confused about the possibility of you being with another woman, and would like you on the backburner. Females are territorial, even when it comes to exes...
Tell her: I'm glad that we're friends still, but we aren't together anymore. I need my space because I can't be myself if I think that you're keeping tabs on my every move.
She should understand. If not, then don't be afraid to be mean. She dumped you, so she shouldn't be so clingy still.
2007-01-25 00:20:32 · answer #3 · answered by Kelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is she contacting you about ? If you are ready to move on then tell her straight up to leave you alone. If she don't then you have to take direct action, like blocking her phone number..etc..etc. Do you want to stay a friend with her ? If you do then lay down some ground rules, if not then the simplest cure for this is to be direct.
2007-01-25 00:30:29 · answer #4 · answered by WOLFMAN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either she is just a super cool chick or she wants you back. I dont think girls do the backburner thing (its too easy to get someone new for that). Just ask!
2007-01-25 00:18:40 · answer #5 · answered by momoftwo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that all depends on how you want to handle her. if you dont care about hurting her feelings and just want her to stop messing with your head and get her out of your life, my advice is this: go to her house/job or wherever she is and tell her FACE TO FACE that you dont care about being friends with her (this may or may not be true in your case, but hear me out) that you want nothing to do with her and if she contacts you again you will get a restrainign order (or something else that will hurt her feelings enough to never WANT to talk to you again...) now like i said, this doesnt have to mean thats how you feel, the point is to just hurt her feelings and making her think she wants nothing to do with her. BUT if you would like to maintain some sort of friendship with this girl, id recomend this... 1) have a heart to heart telling her that you would still like to be friends with her but you dont want the mixed signals and that if she cannot decide one way or the other what she wants to just cut all ties now before either of you waste any more time on the other and go find yourself someone else to love. 2) if you do #1 and she says she can just be friends and stop sending signals BUT she still sends signals anyway, there is a possibility she isnt aware of what she is doing. some girls dont realize how flirty they are. so whenever she does something that you concieve as a mixed signal, MAKE HER AWARE OF IT!! if she says she doesnt know what she wants then i would have to say get rid of her because she is probably just messing with your head, as you said keeping you on the back burner. and no one needs that sort of treatment. good luck...
2007-01-25 00:26:05 · answer #6 · answered by Blenderhead 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are definitely on the backburner honey. She wants a back up plan for when she doesn't have someone else to pay attention to her. Let this one go like a hot potato!
2007-01-25 00:17:15 · answer #7 · answered by Monkey Lips 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would tell her that you're confused as to why she's calling. Tell her that if she wants to be "only" friends - then she needs to give you time to get over the romantic feelings. Once you say these things - you should get your answer.
2007-01-25 00:17:40 · answer #8 · answered by karespromise 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She's female.
They mess with your head for the sake of it and try to play your heart like a banjo for fun.
Tell her where to go.
(A long way off the end of the nearest pier is a good place for her to go)
2007-01-25 00:18:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't be so quick to answer your phone...ignore her calls. Unless of course you like to let people torture you then keep on being available for her.
2007-01-25 00:20:17 · answer #10 · answered by lolita 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋