I met this guy on New Years Eve 2006 and we've been dating since, but I don't feel chemistry between us. I'm happy seeing him a couple of times a week, (as we just met each other) but he always wants to meet and he said he was in love with me. I felt guilty because I don't feel the same way about him. He asked me if I wanted to go out during the day tomorrow but I had already made plans so I had to decline. He looked a bit angry and immediately called his boss saying he was coming to work. I felt pressured and told him I was sorry but I didn't feel a connection between us and just wanted to be friends. I need advice, was I too hasty in this case? He asked me how I could know a relationship isn't going to work and the truth is I don't know 100 percent, but my gut tells me that we're not a match.
2007-01-24 15:36:05 · 12 answers · asked by M N 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I reckon you did the right thing, if you're not feeling the chemistry and he keeps putting the pressure on you (whether he realizes it or not), then you're not going to feel any better about it and you'd be leading him on somewhat. Good on you for actually telling him this, I don't think it was too hasty at all - I've been thinking along the same lines as you seem to have been lately, with someone I know... but I haven't found the moment yet. Eep...
Good luck. =]
2007-01-24 15:49:28 · answer #1 · answered by evilwickedstrawberry 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you were too hasty because it's best to be honest in the beginning of a relationship. It's one thing to date a person, but dating a person where there's no connection of chemistry usually doesn't feel right. Maybe if you would have given it a little more time you may have seen something you didn't see or feel a while back. But you can't force chemistry it comes to your senses naturally. Question is, are you a person who need to feel the chemistry right away? If so, then you made the right decision.Besides, it was early in the relationship and he was already having anger streaks or controlling ways.
2007-01-24 23:47:19 · answer #2 · answered by Red Apple Martini 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that you already have your mind made up here, girl. Even if hes a nice guy who you don't mind hanging out with, you would know by now if you were interested in more.
Usually the first couple of weeks are the "honeymoon phase," complete with butterflies and your stomach and chemistry for sure. I wouldn't settle for less.
Good luck!
2007-01-24 23:43:28 · answer #3 · answered by mistaken4sane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
More people should listen to their gut.
If it was meant to be it would happen. Physical chemistry is very important. If you are not feeling it, good for you to recognize and stay friends. Props for not just keeping him around just for kicks and hurting him more in the long run.
Not too hasty at all!
2007-01-24 23:42:57 · answer #4 · answered by CSnumber1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know why you would question your own feelings! don't let someone manipulate you, a normal person can tell if they have chemistry or not. i mean what would have to happen for you to like him? was he going to get a face lift or a new personality tomorrow? don't feel guilty, you did the right thing and told him politely you wanted to be friends. dont waste your time with the wrong person. it's not your job to be his girlfriend.
2007-01-24 23:41:58 · answer #5 · answered by bellatrix27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing. answer to his question about knowing a relationship isn't going to work....it takes 2 people to make a relationship and i don't feel the same way as you do.If he was in anyway angry how would he be later into the realtionship? If you don't feel it get out.
2007-01-24 23:45:01 · answer #6 · answered by G=ME 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're not feeling him you have to be honest. Don't waste either of your time on something that wont work. A relationship takes two people to care about each other...it can't be one sided.
2007-01-24 23:43:48 · answer #7 · answered by Say What? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go with your gutt. You did the right thing and it sounds like you handled in very well. If he was telling you he loved you after this short of time...wow thats scary....it would have scared me off too.
2007-01-24 23:44:17 · answer #8 · answered by justme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie if he is mad he can get over it cause if you aint happy then there is no point of staying around he'll be ok they always are i promise just follow your heart an a little of your gut
2007-01-24 23:42:37 · answer #9 · answered by megan_wtrs 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since you don feel for him the same juz tell him you all will be frenz better to tell striaghtforward rather den cheat him for months by not feeling the same way as him~!
2007-01-24 23:51:56 · answer #10 · answered by Vani R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋