What should i do? any advice?

Question

OK i was adopted into a family of three other girls and one other boy, we'er all adults now and we'er all really close. at least we where.
recently my sister who is closest to my age and married and having her own children and stuff told our little sister that she hates her boyfriend and doesn't think he is good enough for her.
our little sister got really upset and decided not to talk to my sister anymore. came to me all upset and i told her "honey you have to start living your own life, making your own decisions." but she asked me to talk to her, so i did but sister who hates boyfriend won't budge.
now i am stuck in the middle with either of them trying to talk through me to each other. i mean its like we'er all 12 again. they won't call each other and work it out, little sis wants big sis to respect who she's chosen to be with, and big sis wants lil sis to open her eyes and see the guys a looser, and doesn't do much for her (i'm not saying he is, he's just real spoiled)

I've tried to tell them not to drag me into it believe me. bit i am not gonna ignore my sisters. my family means the world to me.

ok i guess my post was confusing, i'll try to clear it up

Lil sis = one with boyfriend other sister doesn't like

older sis = one who doesn't like lil sis's boyfriend

Sorry :)

Answer 1

It's interesting that you felt it important to say you were "adopted into" a family. Does this mean the others were natural children of your parents? The reason I ask is that you might feel you have to work extra hard keeping the family intact since you were brought into it after birth.

Now, for my real advice: I, too, have three sisters. I learned a long time ago to say to each of them when they had disputes with another sister, "I feel your pain and understand why you feel like you do."

But, I've also learned to add, "It will work out, just give it time."

And, then I stay totally out of the dispute. Why? Because once all of the dust settles, all either of the parties will remember is what you said! Guess who's in a dispute then?!

Answer 2

I think seeing as tho your lil sis was the one who dragged you into and seeing as tho your lil sis is also the one who is totally in the WRONG - then she is the one you should be trying to talk sense into.

Why does you lil sis think she can dictate her older sisters life? Its not going to be easy for your older sis and she needs the support from her family and it seems really selfish of your lil sis to be acting this way. Does she think that she can brainwash her older sister into staying with the guy by not speaking to her and making her life even more harder and complicated?

Tell your lil sister that if she wants her older sis to be miserable for the rest of her life then keep behaving and interfering.

I have a sister and I would support her no matter what. You might not agree with family, and its ok to express your concerns but at the end of the day, family is family and should stick together!

Answer 3

while u say you dont want to be caught in the middle, your actions say that you are-----you can still support each sister by encouraging them to talk about this with each other. Your married sister has made her feelings known about the b/f and now she should drop it. Your sister with the b/f should make her own decisions and kindly ask her sister to mind her own business in a nice way.....

Answer 4

some things you just dont have the power to fix i know it sucks to see them fighting but i really doubt it will be like that forever maybe you should just let things come together by themselfes if you get involved it might back fire on you and then that will suck if you decide to say anything though maybe you should remind the older sister that she has made mistakes in her life to and most times most people have to experience life lessons on there own and all we can do is be there for family when they need us.

Answer 5

Pillow fight. It's the only way to settle something this stupid