Will it last forever this time?

Question

Me and my boyfriend has quite an interesting relationship, we were together for two years and the first year was perfect bliss, while the second year was a little rocky, anyway we moved in together during our second year and things were going good but then we started to argue more frequently, until I decided to move out. We only broke up for a month, until we decided that we were missing each other. So we got back together with an attempt on taking it slow however we dont live with each other anymore. Will the second time around be better? I mean I know that he is totally in love with me, and I love him as well. I just dont want us to get that serious like we use to (im talking married couple) but he insist that we try again. I dont want the mess of last year to repeat itself

Answer 1

First you need to ask your self am "I" happy being with him? Second; if you are not considering marriage, or even thinking of commiting with eachother, whats the point of going on? Life is too short to beat around the bush. If you are not sure that you are in love with him because, you seem to have lots of doubts...then you should consider dating others. YOU BOTH SHOULD. Then maybe you both will know if you really love one another and that you both are made for eachother (need compatability). When you both start dating other people, you both will soon compare good and bad part of your exiting relationship with one another. I remember people saying.. two year itch! Come to think of it, during my 2nd year in relationships, I seemed to have argued alot with most of my "future husbands to be". It may also help if you both sit down and find out what you both want and what is mostly important to both of you in your relationship. Make a list of dos and donts, likes and dislikes, religion (sometimes its important), what your dreams are, what are your goals to achieve in the nexts few months to a year, find out anything and everything that matters to both of you. Sometimes relationship is like a big zig saw puzzle. You just have to fit all the pieces into right places...you can´t make them fit! Find out why you need eachother and your values. If you both are young, then take all the time you both need to experience what can be a beautiful and lasting relationship. Maybe go on a discovery ride... meaning discover more people because there is alot of people out there. But then again...it is difficult to find that someone special in your life. As you have questioned... Will it last forever this time? I feel that "ALL IN TIME", you will know if he is your life long partner or not. Just imagine how difficult it is living with your family. So, trying to be with someone out side of your family meaning, (boyfriends, lovers, future husbands, etc.) who comes into your life as some what or even total stranger, you have to take time to get to know eachother. Learn likes and dislikes... you did when you were growing up with your family. Use kind of similar stratagy to let that special someone take charge of your heart. Fortunately, some where out there there is your prince charming waiting for you. A man who can (almost) give you what you want and know your needs are. (you have to measure this almost between 60-75%) perfect for you. The rest, you have to work at it. Good luck and best wishes.

Answer 2

this is the question of the year! lol! First there are no guarantees in life. I think fighting starts after we move in together for several reasons, one doesn't appreciate the other, the romance part leaves the relationship, the female takes the "lady of the house" role and the husband/bf becomes best friends with the remote control, he'd rather rub the buttons on that then concentrate on the buttons that he found on you. males tend to think old fashioned, be a great cook, great friend, tiger in the bedroom, and they have nothing they really have to uphold or do, in fact they totally relax. This is what I see most of the time, the woman feels unappreciated, tired from working and working hard in the house, and if theres kids well add some more stress in there too. Escape, the 2 of you have a date, go somewhere, do something he likes, and vice versa, if you haven't guessed I too I am experiencing some of these things, and I miss the little dates to have a couple beers and talk and laugh, all of that disappeared and its come home cook, clean, kids, laundry,homework, kids, and start it all over the next day. Go for walks, hikes, get aways, just little short trips, for the day, 4 wheeling, etc,
I hope it works out, hang in there, if you love him and he loves you, you can work it out

Answer 3

Nothing in life is guaranteed, especially love. There's no way to know if it will "last forever", all you can do is take the chance, or not. And the second time around will only be better if you both work to make it so. Loving each other is not all you need to make a relationship work - yes, it's the most important thing, but you both still have to make the daily effort to compromise and consider each other.
Tell him you'll consider "trying again" if you both enroll in couples counseling to help discover the source of, and solution to, your previous problems.

Answer 4

Change is always difficult and living with anyone can be stressful. In my opinion it is important to live together before marriage to see if you are compatible. It could be that he feels he could have done a better job and that is why he wants to try again - and honestly, if you trust each other there is no reason not to try again. It may or may not work out - but the treasure is the experience. It's learning about this important part of our lives with people we care deeply about that is the true joy and the real gift in relationships. It might last, but nothing is a sure thing.

Peace!

Answer 5

It's tough getting used to someone elces habits. When you move in together you are always together and you tend to know everything about one another. Thats hard at first. Give it a little while on your own and then if everythings ok relationship wise, you might try it again. It's bound to be better the second time because you already know some of his little habits and he does yours. It should be easier the second time around.

Answer 6

It's a totally different ball game when your living together. Figure out what were the problems that you both had when you were living together. Tell him if there is something you can't except when your living together. And if there is something that he can't except hear him out. If you can agree on this then there is hope. You both have to understand that things are not going to go exactly as you guys want. If you can live with (in your opinion) his bad habits, and he can except yours than you should be able to live together. If not than move on. Just remember to communicate all this before living together with him again. Good Luck!

Answer 7

First, nothing lasts forever. You will die, or he will die, or the universe will suffer heat death and you'll both die.

Second, whether you last the rest of this life together depends on one word, and one word only - committment.

My wife and I have a rocky relationship - but neither of us would consider "moving on." We're "committed." Divorce is not an option - murder might be, but not divorce.

If you leave the relationship "open," and don't decide in your mind that it's "forever" whatever that selfish, piggish, horrible guy does, then it won't be. End of story - all guys are jerks, just decide if this one is worth the hassle.

Answer 8

Well, a relationship is a two way street. You need to want the same things and you need to work really hard at it. I find that you have to work harder, cause its never 50/50. Once you have been together so long and lived together how can you not be too serious. I wish you luck and any way you look at it, it takes alot of work and nothing is ever perfect.

Answer 9

Well if you don't want the repeat of something bad happened then all you have to do is when something's not working out or if you guys have a fight or anything that makes you two seperate again, think of how much you love him and don't want to lose him and just be like: It's just this small thing and I don't want this SMALL thing to ruin our relationship...I'm not directly saying this to you but many people are selfish and when something's not to their benefit, they break up, so maybe if that's the case then just let it go once in a while...not everyone can benefit...it'll be like taking turns...again, don't take this personally

Answer 10

From experience I can tell you that relationships like this usually get worse, not better. You can't expect it to improve unless you have truly dealt with the issues that were causing problems before. People don't usually just change for the better for no reason. It sounds like you are not serious about the relationship anyway, so why even pursue it any further? Try something new!