A 4 year old kid doesn't want to grow anymore because she knows her growing up means mommy getting old, and she knows old people eventually die. I cannot tell her that people go to heaven after they die because I don't believe in it. What's a better alternative?
2007-01-24 07:01:22 · 16 answers · asked by aging_mom 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
We talked with my son about my grandfather's death recently. We talked about how his body didn't work any more and that when his body didn't work, that meant he was dead. We said that great-grandpa no longer ate, or slept, or talked, but that he also didn't feel any pain. We also reassured him that mom and dad were here and that we planned to be here for a long time. We said that it he would probably have a very long time with us before he even needed to consider that we would die. Finally, we talked about how it is much harder on the people who are still alive because we feel sad. We will miss him, but we also have great memories.
2007-01-24 08:46:04 · answer #1 · answered by Medical Disaster 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your child is scared and rightly so. This is a big bad world we live in where people die every day. I have no idea what you will tell her. I would like to tell you that we are not here by accident. This is not a mistake and we did not crawl out of the ocean an evolve into what we are today. You want her to believe that something like a tornado came through a junk yard and out of that chaos came our world and us with all of our billions of little DNA cells that make us totally unique from anyone else on this earth. You also want her to believe that when she dies that's it, it's over and done and she will be forgotten in a couple of generations. So of course she is scared, I would be too. But can i tell you that it is not a sign of weakness to believe in God. He loves us very much, we are his children and he wants to take care of us, we simply don't allow it because we want to be in control. Does that sound like your girl? Sounds like my 2 1/2 year old boy!! I could go on and on about this but you will have to find out for yourself. The alternative to no heaven is despair so I pray for you and your family you seek heaven. Only try not to fall prey to the ones that tell you it's not free because it is. Jesus paid the price for you to get in, all you need to do is ask for him to come and live in your heart.
2007-01-24 08:17:56 · answer #2 · answered by sunshine_rae 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
bgmom have some sense, it is a way to explain, but for me is very sad to think that life is only that. the child is 4 yrs. old and already does not have a purpose, a reason to live for.What drives you? we are not plants or animals. We have a reasoning mind. Look for some way(either by reading a lot or talking to an expert) to help your child. there are a lot more questions coming to you. And your answers are going to be the difference in what kind of person you are bringing up.
2007-01-24 07:13:55 · answer #3 · answered by SEG48 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just state it like it is. People, animals, anything that lives grows old and dies. Just make sure to tell the child that it takes a LONG, LONG time for a person to get OLD. (A year is a long time to a kid that age.....make sure they realize that it's so far away that she doesn't need to worry about it.)
There is a Caillou episode that deals with that.
2007-01-24 07:47:32 · answer #4 · answered by Jessie P 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because you have rejected God does not give you the right to deny your child an experience of Him. She obviously has need of a faith, and even if you don't share than need you have a duty of providing her the education she requires.
Find a local parish with a quality Sunday school or religious preschool and see if that environment begins to improve her disposition. If you love her and truly wish to alleiviate her concerns, then do what's right for her and not what seems right for you.
(If you do not believe in Heaven because you are Jewish or Jehovah's Witness or something along those lines, seek out a rabbi or other appropriate leader to see what your faith says about death and dying. You may just not be well enough versed in your own tradition to answer her questions, and learning more would be good for both of you.)
2007-01-24 07:27:20 · answer #5 · answered by Mysterious Gryphon 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Mother Nature is a great teacher of everything
show the kid Nature ,things are being born and die all the time ,and with all kinds of life spans,
the one day fly and
the butterfly for quick lessons ,
flowers grow and die
then compare it to people
and explain ther the dead are food for the living
death supplies life.
2007-01-24 07:12:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
i do no longer understand the existence span of a beta, yet especially situations my liked goldie (additionally named Charles!) gets this very sickness. i've got self assurance that's swim bladder ailment. Boil some peas (I microwave them in water), and mush some gentle ones up for the little guy. Hand feed if mandatory. Peas seem a ask your self treatment for the little fishies. i'm hoping he gets greater powerful! playstation do no longer feed him the pea shells, merely the gentle innards... additionally somewhat aquarium salt does no longer injury, i think of around a tablespoon consistent with 5 gallons... do no longer oversalt!
2016-11-26 23:34:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her that people live until they are done. but you can't stop living you have to keep on. you need to be a big girl and go to school and someday when you get married and have a child so mommy can be a grandmommy.
2007-01-24 07:05:22 · answer #8 · answered by littleluvkitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without faith in God, there's not much hope you can share with this frightened child.
If she thinks there's nothingness after death, of course she won't want to grow up and face that. Nobody would.
I hope Jesus touches your heart before it's too late. Even if the Bible is a fairy tale, it's comforting to believe that His kind arms are what I'll run to when I die.
When she's gone from this Earth, I'll see my Mom again beyond the stars! Our faith in God is what keeps us believers going during hard times. ~L~
2007-01-24 07:13:29 · answer #9 · answered by Lilly S 3 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Teach her using a plant...show her how it starts young, grows strong and serves its purpose, then is returned to the earth and end up being rich fertilizer so a new plant can grow.
2007-01-24 07:04:40 · answer #10 · answered by bgmom 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋