and of all that is going on it is the one change about myself I would like to make. For some reason no matter how much I know someone I feel they will still try to hurt me. Even with my psychiatrist Im afraid to tell her stuff because I think she will hurt me or that my body will fall limp and I wont be able to protect myself. Even though logically I know my doc doesnt want to hurt me its just that everytime i get real honest I get thrown in the hospital and i feel betrayed. I want to be honest even if that means going in the hospital. I want to be open with people. How do I get over this strong ability to throw up my walls?
2007-01-24 05:36:40 · 13 answers · asked by b 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Kat, you know you need professional help. You are also a cutter. Stop feeling betrayed when you go to the hospital. They can help you. If you fight them, you are never going to get better---it will only get worse. You have posted so many questions about what you should do and you know the answer. You are circling the drain, my dear. If you want it to stop, call your doctor and LET her have you admitted. If you go in with the right attitude, you will be amazed at how much better you will feel.
2007-01-24 05:43:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Whether you are aware of it or not, what is stopping you from letting others in, is fear. Our fears develop from traumas but they also develop in the first 2-3 years of life with our parents (usually our mothers). Because the connection with your mother is so connected to survival needs, they will continue to direct your feelings and behaviors as an adult. You see, interactions with others trigger these early imprinted neuropathways. You may not be afraid of others but your reptilian brain has learned otherwise--and it's in charge of your emotions.
In order to reduce your fears you need to re-experience them in very, very small doses in the safety of another relationship. Hopefully, you can find this with your psychiatrist. (Issues around feeling betrayed will need to be addressed for you to feel safe again.)
If you experience feeling close to someone too soon, your nervous system will get panicky. Try not to worry about the thoughts that seem irrational. At some basic level they are expressing these early fears.
To support your counseling, try strategies that calm the body. If you calm your body you are calming the same area in the brain where the fears reside. Calming activities like yoga, tai chi, breath work, tracking sensations in your body and even a hot bath are helpful. They must be specific to your needs however.
If you'd like to learn more visit: http://www.myshrink.com.
2007-01-24 14:29:46 · answer #2 · answered by Go4Counseling 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been to a psychiatrist's, and I've been to a psychologist. I find that a psychologist helped me more. In my experience the psychologist,was more helpful, because they talk about your issues and not just the drugs that can help you. You have figure out why you have trust issues first, then find the answers to help you overcome them. I too have trust issues. I tend to really listen and observe a person a while before I will let them in. If they don't show me I can trust them, then I keep them at arms length or forget about a relationship with that person. You will get hurt in life but, you have learn to be able to seek out those who won't hurt you. Their are alot of people in the world who will always hurt people.It is a learned skill figuring out which ones to avoid and which ones to trust. It can take years, but you will get there. Learn to pray it really helps, I promise. God bless you! Hang in there sweety! :)
2007-01-24 14:31:04 · answer #3 · answered by Suel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is a process that may take longer then you want it too. If you really want to try then that is what you are going to have to do, try. When your talking with someone be honest. Start opening up to the people who you feel that you can trust, such as: doctors, psychiartist, close friends and family. Once you feel more comfortable with them then try it on other people. It will be hard, but you may have to force yourself to let yourself be open.
Good luck! =)
2007-01-24 13:44:45 · answer #4 · answered by Taylor 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What we know to be logical and how we feel emotionally seldom coincide with each other honey. The first step is in recognizing and admitting you have this very real issue with trust. Second you need to discover and admit the REASON(S) for this problem, I have a few ideas but won't name them here for your privacy. I too once had the exact same problem, it took a lot of hard work but I did overcome most of it, you can too, but before you can you have to learn to trust in yourself. God Bless and Good Luck.
2007-01-24 13:49:31 · answer #5 · answered by Daydream Believer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think anyone can really understand what you are going through unless they have been there and i have it is really hard to trust anyone for me i don't even trust my psychiatrist but she knows it bc she can tell there really is no way to get over it i still haven't and i am 18 so i have had this problem since i was 13. yeah the only person i learned to let in i put through a test to see if i could trust him i told him very personal things that weren't true to see what he would do then i found other ways to teat him and he proved himself. you need to find a way to see if someone is good to let in only you can decide how or when to do that.
2007-01-24 14:19:22 · answer #6 · answered by ashley h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are already aware of it, thats a good start. i assume your psychiatrist is not helping you for free, and you're not going to get the treatment you are paying for if you are not honest with her, if you don't tell her she will not know. you have to tell her so she can help you!
jus remember, fear is only in your head, you have complete and total control over whether you fear something or not, its up to you.
just let the words come, once you open the flood gates, more will come out than you know, and you will feel better once you get everything off your shoulders.
2007-01-24 13:52:25 · answer #7 · answered by Fluffington Cuddlebutts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only thing that you can do is make a sincere effort to catch yourself before you put up your walls. there's nothing wrong with being careful but if it's interfering with your life and your ability to be happy then that's not good. i have the same problem, i lie to people (even my loved ones) about things so that they think i'm something that i'm not so that no one knows how incredibly screwed up i am. my doc just tells me to think about what i say before i say it. and i think the same thing could work for you. you just have to be very aware of your actions and make yourself be vunerable and not be afraid of it. once you do it a few times, it will get easier. i promise. good luck!!
2007-01-24 13:42:26 · answer #8 · answered by chingona1027 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem...trusting people. I can't I was abused molested and raped as a child matter of fact all of my childhood and I am so tramatized I cannot trust anyone not even my mom... but when I get scared I say Jesus name three time with all of my faith and everything and tyhought seems to go away and it's like magic words ... but it helps me almost instantly... try it!
2007-01-24 14:10:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
in a way thats a good thing because there are so few people out there that can be trusted, be cautious for sure, continue to seek professional help. Try to find a friend or friends that is like yourself, everybody is different, I don't let many people in my life either because i don't trust them, but i do have have a couple, so just be choosey over your friends. don't let your guard for anybody
2007-01-24 14:41:37 · answer #10 · answered by COUNTRY GIRL 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋