My boyfriend is having some problums with his father... he does not live with him though... my boyfriend seems to be really quiet and wants to alone which I find odd cause when I am upset I want to b around people... it kind of makes me feel like he doesn't trust me...?
2007-01-24 01:49:05 · 12 answers · asked by schmexy_ambah 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Guys are different from girls when it comes to letting their emotions show. They don't like to talk about their problems as much as we do.
2007-01-24 01:53:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your BF just wants to be alone. He is not the type to curse and swear and show an unhappy face when he faces some problems. He is upset and he is dealing it with his own way. Different people has different ways to handle problems. I don't like people to nag at my ears or talk too much when i have problems. He might not have enough passion to show his sadness. He is hiding it. He just need some time to heal his pain which is deep in his heart. So what you can do is just be with him, don;t talk too much, hug him even though he keeps unusually quiet. Just let him feel, you are there for him. Trust me he can feel it in his heart.
2007-01-24 09:55:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has different ways that they deal with things. Don't take it personally that he want to be alone, it is probably his way of handling his problems with his father. Just let him know that you are there for him if he wants to talk or if he simply needs company. It definitely does not sound like a trust issue though.
2007-01-24 09:54:53 · answer #3 · answered by Sled Queen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its good that you realize that some people need other in times of stress and some just need to be alone. Sit him down and tell him that you will give him space but that you are there for him if he ever needs to talk or a shoulder to cry on. Don't push him and later on he'll see what an understanding girlfriend you've been.
2007-01-24 09:55:45 · answer #4 · answered by glim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone is different.. I'd suggest you read that book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by John Gray.. It actually explains this. WOmen like to be around other people. They like to talk about their problems. Because it helps them feel better. Guys are more the type to go to their own space when they are having problems. Having someone else solve their problems makes them feel inferior.. Give him his space.. Let him know you are there for him if he wants to talk about it. :) Don't worry.. Its normal for guys to be like this.. :) Read this book.. I'm half way through it.. and it just makes so much sense.. Its great! In the book it also tells how when men go to other men, its because they want their problem fixed.. So.. naturally when women go to men.. They put their "Fix-It" hat on.. (as they call it) Women don't like that, they want to be heard.. Men feel bad because they don't understand why the women don't want the advice and they feel rejected, like their advice isn't any good.. Anyhow, its just amazing how great this book is.. :) READ IT! :)
Good Luck!
2007-01-24 09:56:26 · answer #5 · answered by stephanieann31882 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are very different in the ways that they deal with stressful situations. You seek out other people to talk about what is going on and get different viewpoints (most women do this) and he retreats to find out the solution in his own mind.. (most men do this as well) It is a perfectly normal situation and I wouldn't worry about if he trusts you or not.. its just that he is contemplating what to do in his own mind. Just be there when he feels like to talk... and support his decision.
Best of Luck
2007-01-24 09:54:57 · answer #6 · answered by thebe_gl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read men are from mars women are from venus...
What you describe is so cliche for that book... really men generally withdrawl when troubled and come out when they have reconciled their feelings... women want to talk....
Men usually only talk about problems if they are looking for help... an answer...
Hence when you tell a man your problem they will often offer a solution... and women get mad because they don't want a solution they just want to talk about it...
don't worry this is all normal... just support him and let him know you are there for him if he needs you... just be nice to him..
2007-01-24 09:54:00 · answer #7 · answered by AvidBeerDrinker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not all people want people around when they are upset, give him some space but let him know your there if he needs you and you will support him in any way he choses to handle this situation.
2007-01-24 09:53:32 · answer #8 · answered by Donna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm more like your boyfriend.
I have to come to terms first by myself with
some things. Then I talk about them.
He might feel that the problem with his Father is one
he will need to handle alone.
2007-01-24 09:59:20 · answer #9 · answered by elliebear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People handle stress/problems differently. It has nothing to do with you. He might be worried that he'll accidentally take his stress out on you (in a bad way). Call him up and offer to listen to his problems.
2007-01-24 09:53:07 · answer #10 · answered by rehelek 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋