How come most guys are so incensere? I mean, maybe there are some out there that are, but it seems like theres barely any hope now for a girl that truly wants a relationship for love, and not physical stuff? how come so many guys, even if they are nice, mess you around? for instance, I liked this guy for 4 yrs, he was one of my best friends, and lovely. He found out I liked him, and started acting like he liked me, about 2 years in. It turned out he was giong out with one girl, flirting really badly and saying stuff that said he liked us to me and a friend who liked him, and also saying stuff to a friend upcountry over msn that was innapropriate in the situation. It really hurt me, cus everyone thought he liked me, and when I realized my BEST FRIEND had just given me a run around, it was really hard. How come so many guys are like this??
2007-01-23 22:32:24 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he was four years older than me, and is lovely in every other way and we still are really good friends, thats why I cant understand it.
2007-01-23 22:50:44 · update #1
he is also still really protective of me
2007-01-23 22:52:25 · update #2
hey..im sorry to hear that k..mustve hurt like hell..
well, it might be hard to truly understand us guys..but as a guy myself, this is wat i know.. we guys're very visual and physical.. when we say we like a girl, it is often jus some infatuation -more often than not, physical or visual.. so that's why our eyes always go everywhere at all times...we like to see beauty in women.. the thing is, there're different type of guys...
the first: he DOESN'T KNOW that his attraction is only physical, and not one with the goal of marriage..so he goes for the girl, thinkin, "if she's cool with me, then we'd have fun together"..so this one might be sincere, but he might jus break ur heart in the end..
the second: he KNOWS that it's jus visual n physical, yet he still goes for the girl, cuz he wants to hev fun anyway..enjoy life, he says..he can quit the relationship anytime..at least that's what he thinks..(cuz we guys aren't as emotionally attached as girls..)...this one is rather scarier cuz he's jus playin around with u..intentionally, for his own pleasure..
the third: he DOESN'T KNOW about his attraction being an infatuation for physical n visual arousal..but anyway, he doesn't dare to move in on u..cuz he's scared of commitments or other things...
the fourth: he KNOWS that he's only physically n visually, and he doesn't dare to commit himself to any relationship with the girl cuz he knows that the girl's likely to get very emotional in relationships..so uncalculated approaches might led to too deep an expectation from the girl..and therefore, he doesn't go for her.. so that he doesn't have to break her heart in the end, in case he aint ready for marriage..
well, i dunno what ur boyfriend is in.. only u know.. i'm in the fourth group..that's why im still single now..it kinda sucks, but hey, maybe it aint worth hurtin too many souls for my own selfish pleasure, eh?...
well, anyway, i hope u can go thru these emotionally hurtin times k..aint easy, but i bet u can.. pls free urself from him.. i dun think he's serious with u.. if u dun want ur heart to keep bleedin, u might wanna find someone more worthy of u..
2007-01-23 23:41:35 · answer #1 · answered by deathbyte 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I went through a similar situation in 2002. My sole mate (or so I thought) and I got back together, after I finally moved back to my home town. @ four months of being back together, (he was still in touch with X the whole time) So one nite he stayed in a hotel with her (she worked & had keys to all the rooms) Yeah thats right, he went there, (she knew what we had ment to each other, she got him drunk, cried (which she never did) and got on her knees and begged him. at least he held out for a few mins. That was a changing point in my life I was done. He had made his decision. (her)
I put up with little things that led into more things.
I wanted a good relationship. (almost couldn't see anything else)(All my past relationships have included abusive)
He didn't respect me. (He should not have gone to the hotel with her)
We were in a relationship years before and I thought we could pick it up where we had left off.
There is alot more women in the big ocean than men so the odds are against us.
I will not settle
I deserve better
2007-01-23 23:00:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is not good and I'm not surprised you feel hurt and confused. I think there are plenty of girls out there asking the same questions. The male of the species can be confusing indeed. Don't fret though as there is a whole site devoted to just this called... Will He Call...? http://www.willhecall.com
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2007-01-23 22:50:16 · answer #3 · answered by girly girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most guys are walking erections. I dont care if they're teenagers, businessman, rock stars, fathers, husbands, or grandfathers. If it has a knob, you can just about guarantee it is a walking erection. How do I know? I am one of them!!! I am just honest about it thats all. If he truly liked you, or respected you, he would have protected, and defended you from all comers. And, if he really were your best friend he would never have put you in that situation to start with. He's just a little boy with a small narrow view of life and all that is important in life. Turn your back on him and his pettiness, take a deep breath, and step forward into the light.
2007-01-23 22:49:30 · answer #4 · answered by Grant B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i could sell off him asap. If he likes yet another woman and he or she him, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? true love does not play video games or have wandering eyes, this is committed and complicated artwork. you ought to work out this as a crimson flag, a deal breaker, strike 3. Your youthful, i'm guessing, you mustn't additionally be pondering a severe relationship that is going to reason you lack of self belief. have relaxing, do no longer grow to be overly invested in this, WHAT? you may not flirt? pass on, the writing is on the wall and it spells difficulty. Do your self a choose and shrink the guy loose, whether it is destined to be, this is going to run this is direction and he would be back. yet why you're able to take him back purely you may answer.
2016-11-01 03:50:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Young guys are often immature. They are out for conquest alone. They do not think about life and the way they are acting. Most guys don't think too well ( hormones ) until in there 20's and some at that age are still messed up. Good Luck.
2007-01-23 22:38:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys may be indecisive and insincere, but from my perspective, a lot of females seem that way too. Perhaps you're just going for the wrong guys. I understand you can't really "choose" who you're attracted to and who your not, but just because you like or love someone doesn't mean you're meant to be together. I say stay friends with them for as long as it takes to learn what kind of a person they really are, inside and out. Good luck.
2007-01-23 22:39:53 · answer #7 · answered by Dirt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men wants what they want,thats why you don't give them all of you tell you know for sure he's going to be with you.Men get really bored unless hey are a true guy they'll get bored and go somewhere else thats fake.
If your a true lady give alittle of yourself and really get to know the person first.Alot of thi is only lust.Sorry to say this your a good person know the difference between lust and love.
2007-01-23 22:41:55 · answer #8 · answered by Dawn l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Or, better question, why do most women instinctively go for guys who treat them like ****, fail to see any warning signs and expect a guy who's already proved himself unfaithful to one girl to turn into their little angel all of a sudden?
Most guys spend much time bemoaning the general condition of womankind. Specifically sluts, teases and just dumb broads.
Mainly, these criticisms are due to misunderstanding each other and not managing each other's expectations of relationships, I suppose.
2007-01-23 22:41:39 · answer #9 · answered by Benny Blanco 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What your really asking is why do people think I am I too young to be dating and getting serious with young guys?
ANSWER IS: because you can't understand your too young and immature for any of this....concentrate on yourself and getting smart in college later and not having to rely on a guy! best advice ever!! good luck!
2007-01-23 22:38:44 · answer #10 · answered by yawhosucs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋