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Question

There's this guy I like and we talk during school and stuff... he's so cute and kind, he has a girlfriend and lots of other girls that like him, but I'm absolutely crazy about him and need an entirely discreet way to win him over. I'm afraid I don't have the guts to wink or flirt or straight out tell him or anything like that, which is why I need something "discreet" that won't scar me for the rest of my life, and will pass without notice if he doesn't like me, too. xD Anything?

Answer 1

If you're absolutely crazy about him the way you say you are, then you can't let yourself worry about being scarred. The worse kind of scar is knowing you never tried.

I'm not saying it's a healthy thing to break up another person's relationship. But showing that you are interested isn't necessarily harmful either. Sometimes people settle in rocky relationships because they aren't consciously aware of the option to leave. You know this guy, I don't. So I can't say if he's in any kind of similar situation, but you'll know if you're treading on a happy relationship or one that doesn't have much substance. Only the latter is one that comes without guilt.

I suggest you try to hang with him every chance you get when there are a group of people around. Be responsive showing off your personality by engaging in the conversations. Doing that makes most guys comfortable breaking the ice with a girl, so if he develops an interest, that should work. If not, then no harm no foul!

Like I said before though, you should just be straight with him before giving up if you really care that much. Contrary to how some of the others here feel, the guy has more responsibility to preserve his relationship with his girlfriend if it is something he truly cherishes. Telling someone who is NOT married how you feel is not a bad thing if done in a respectful way.

Answer 2

I can tell you how I got the girl, it'd probably work the other way, too...

When he's not around say something nice about him to one of his friends. You don't have to say that you like him or anything like that. What you are doing is making sure that he gets some outside influence pointing him in your direction. You will need to make it enough so that you are certain it will get back to him without your asking.

It's real easy to say that you think Bobby is the cutest guy in school because the subject comes up all of the time.

If he misses a day, tell someone that you miss him and then tell HIM that you missed him when he returns. Show your concern for why he missed, like, "Are you feeling better"?

Whatever you do, be yourself. Don't try to like baseball if you don't. At any rate, that would give you a chance to go to the game and say that you are only going to watch Bobby play.

Make room at the table when he walks up.

If you hear him complaining about a sore shoulder, give him a rub. Don't bowl anyone over to get there first. You can simply ask would he like you to rub it.

Last thing I can think of is to ask him to join you as part of your group of friends in something you do. Be sure not to invite your competition, but also make sure it's legit. All you're trying to do is give him a better chance to get to know who you are. As a bonus, you also get to learn who he is.

Us guys are shy, too. At your age, I feared rejection. Once he KNOWS you like him, you'll be on his mind.

Last bit of advice. This shouldn't take more than a month, so, if it doesn't work, move on. Everybody doesn't like you. Some do, others don't. But you'll find someone who does, and hopefully, that will also be someone that you like.

Good luck!

PS It won't ruin your life! By the time you're 21, you'll only be in touch with 4 or 5 of them and you'll soon forget all the rest!

Answer 3

If this is the type of guy that has a girlfriend and on top of that alot of other girls liking him then you'll NEVER get him with that attidute. If you dont have the confidence to flirt with him then you're not going to get him. And don't "tell him how you feel" either like some of these people are saying. Saying that just SCREAMS "I like you, but I lack the confidence/flirting skills to get you to notice me."

Answer 4

Why don't you ask a few of your friends to meet at a soda shop for burgers or something.. Making sure he is invited, if he shows than you will know he is interested in you or he may tell you that he would like to but has other plans which still means he's interested. Now; if he said's no, than; he has no idea your interested in him and no harm done. He will just assume its a few people getting together to talk and enjoy each others conversation. NO FOUL AND NO HARM DONE..

Answer 5

is he taking anybody serious u he is just a big flirt? which spells trouble.
Anyway be friends with the guy and dont be pushy, he might be attracted to your laid back style as compared to evry other gal pushing for him.
Make a good choice though. Do you want all that competition and for what??

Answer 6

find a guy that doesnt have a girlfriend!!! how would you feel just imagine your that chick. then some other chick comes along an trys to steal him away from you. doesnt seem like much fun does it??? stay away from the taken guys. you'll just made things harder for yourself at school.

Answer 7

i would actually go hrough the friend route, that way when he has these other girls, they break up, your the friend there to help him through. But dont become like one of the guys, make sure he realizes your still a girl, trust me this works

Answer 8

It sounds like he might be a big flirt. If you did end up with him, he would probably make you miserable.

Answer 9

That is sooooooooo wrong. I can't believe you want him to cheat on his girlfriend and go out with you.

Grow up and go after another guy...leave him and her alone!!

Answer 10

all you can do it be friendly, say hi and maybe he'll be sick of all the others flirting anyway. If he likes you you'll soon know.