For example: I was going to be a Marine, but I couldn't pass the physical.................... I just couldn't get my head in that dang jar! I know that ones old and lame, so give me some good ones.
No offense to yall Marines out there, Thanks for serving by the way.
2007-01-23 16:37:10 · 11 answers · asked by the radioactiveman 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
Since the army one was already posted.
Marine - My A$$ Rides in Navy Equipment
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A NCO and Officer were in the bathroom. The officer goes to leave and washes his hands. Shortly there after the NCO goes to leave and the Officer stops him. He says, " In the academy we learn to wash our hands after we use the bathroom."
The NCO looks at him and says, "Well in basic we learned not to piss on our hands."
2007-01-23 18:10:53 · answer #1 · answered by Zabe 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This may be old too but What does Army stand for Ain't ready Marines yet. Or what does USMC stand for Uncle Sam's misguided Children. I don't like that one being a Marine .
2007-01-23 17:22:03 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do to a lack of money to put on real war games, this military unit had to play the children's version of the game of bang bang your dead. Two opposing soldiers faced off against each other.
Soldier 1: He puts his arms out like he is shooting a rifle. "Bang Bang."
Soldier 2: Just stands there
Soldier 1: gives a stabbing motion "stab stab"
soldier 2: just stands there
Soldier 1: Pretends to lob a grenade at soldier 2
soldier 2: just stands there
Soldier1: He gets frustrated and goes, "I shot you, I stabbed you and I threw a grenade at you. Why aren't you 'dead?'"
Soldier 2: "I'm a tank, rumble, rumble."
2007-01-23 19:46:50 · answer #3 · answered by gregory_dittman 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is a joke...
The Marine Corp performance has declined. They performed a 21 gun salute to President Clinton. They all missed.
2007-01-23 16:51:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear. No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?"
The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler."
"I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You've got to have a sticker on the windshield."
The general said, "Drive on!"
The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker."
The general repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on!"
The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I'm new at this. Do I shoot you or the the driver?
2007-01-23 16:59:57 · answer #5 · answered by D.O... 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
marine corps boot camp is mind over matter
the drill instructors: dont mind
the recruits: it dont matter
2007-01-23 16:47:00 · answer #6 · answered by Beaujock 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go to
2007-01-24 02:54:46 · answer #7 · answered by mary texas 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bush pulling out of Iraq
2007-01-23 17:07:26 · answer #8 · answered by Andrew G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess my best answer to "What's the best military joke?" would have to be -
OUR PRESIDENT!
(It would be funnier if so many of our boys weren't getting screwed.)
2007-01-23 16:49:40 · answer #9 · answered by JimsShip 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Jeeze, look at these!
2007-01-23 16:46:26 · answer #10 · answered by speakeasy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋