I have an intense fear of failure or success, leading to inaction on my part. I can't even pick up the phone. I mean I can, but I am just so afraid. What happens is, I can feel the rejection or uncertainty of my desire and then I don't go for it. If I was really sure of something, I am not afraid to go after it at all. But once I am not sure, or if I have a gut feeling of rejection, I just get pararlyzed by fear. But then after I don't go for it, I realize no action is even worse, so than I go into a vicious circle of no action and over thinking. How can I stop this behaviour? I need serious help! Please send me your advice! I really need human contact.
2007-01-23 15:30:12 · 6 answers · asked by Math P 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
My goodness, what you are experiencing is human nature. We all dislike and attempt to avoid rejection, however, the very process of rejection often makes us stronger! Hell, we would all be so cocky and unable to appreciate attaining goals if things just fell in our laps. Your statement regarding no action being worse than attempting something you desire is golden......write it down...post it on your bathroom mirror.
Intense fear can also be treated with medication if you choose to go that route. Just remember that you a an individual with self worth! Over thinking any situation can drive you mad....give yourself a break and some of your mania will be alleviated.
Good luck to you!
2007-01-23 15:48:10 · answer #1 · answered by lydlykarug 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been going through this exact thing for years, and am still not completely over it. I dropped out of school, lost all my friends, and refuse to work because of this fear of rejection or even failure after becoming successful. I'm starting therapy/counselling in february though, and am hoping it will help me vent my feelings, and in turn receive helpful advice from a professional who can help me cope with these anxieties, and then hopefully I'll be able to tackle this fear head on. I can't really give you much advice at this time, the only thing I can ask is that you don't give up. I feel like I've lost so much already, and I could have easily saved myself by really just being myself, and not caring about what other people see in me. It's you against the world, you just need to know who to really listen to, and who to brush off. I wish you good luck in life and hope you can come out of your shell. I completely understand where you're coming from, just know that you're not alone. :)
*Edit*
As the first answerer said, medication can be helpful. I on the other hand, do not find it helpful to me at all. I have been on countless anti-depressant/anti-anxiety medications, and they really only seem to numb my emotions..and I ended up more like a zombie than an overall happy person. I suggest something more natural...but everyone is different.
2007-01-23 15:38:26 · answer #2 · answered by xoxo_sexy_biatch_xoxo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Face God. He's not that scary. Only the unrepentant sinner will need to go into His presence with fear and trembling. He wants His people to approach Him like He's our Daddy. (I know not all Daddies are a good example of this, my apologies to anyone who doesn't have one or has an abusive one...it's not supposed to be that way) When I was raising little kids, the highlight of my day was to come home and have my kids run up to me and give me a hug. Really, you just start by loving Him. And knowing He loves you. He is not willing that anyone should perish. If you ask Him, He will help you overcome the fear. He doesn't want you to feel that way. He wants to be loved by you. He will help you if you ask Him to. If you don't have a spirit of love, joy, peace and a sound mind, ask and you will receive. Seek and you will find. Knock and the door will be opened to you. God has so much more for you. He wants to fill you with His Spirit. Ask Him. You need to know how much He really does love you. I didn't understand that or feel that or ever actually receive His Spirit until I was 29 years old. Sorry if my answer seems to ramble a little bit. I generally organize my thoughts a little more before I start typing. But my heart broke when I read what you were going through. I think we have all been there. Ask Him and trust Him to answer. He will show you that He loves you and that He wants you to be His child. Do you know that Jesus is God in the flesh? He said "whoever has seen me has seen the Father" (that might be a paraphrase, I don't have my Bible right with me, but it is the basic gist of it) so if you read those Gospels, you will learn all about Jesus and consequently learn all about God. He showed anger toward people who tried to set Him up and who blasphemed Him. Every now and then, I'm sure He had to roll His eyes with those disciples during His time on Earth. But He had compassion for all who truly reached out to Him. If you want to understand the love of God, get to know the love of Jesus. I could go all night with this, but I'd bore you after a while. And I have to work in the morning. I'm going to keep you in my prayers. Trust Jesus. He will not leave you comfortless. I hope this helps. PS Repentance is turning away from your sins. Lying is one of those sins, but if you will turn away from that and whatever else you do and ask Him to forgive you, He will. I'll stop rambling now. Talk to Him. He is a good God and is kind to those who love Him.
2016-03-28 23:44:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
God loves you and you are precious to Him, whether people think you are successful or not. You can be fearless of men.
In the Beginning God created heavens and earth.
God gives us air to breathe and sunshine to enjoy.
God gives us water to drink and food to eat.
God gives us a wonderful body and sound mind, to live.
God loves us, and we are precious to Him.
Son of God died on the Cross to save us from condemnation.
Jesus’ love is boundless and everlasting.
We have the hope of Heaven through Jesus.
Life therefore has fantastic and glorious future!
(Please must visit: www.spiritlessons.com
2007-01-23 15:36:13 · answer #4 · answered by tmthyh 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like Social anxiety or social phobia; at least you're clear on your needs (human contact). Wish you well -A
2007-01-23 16:12:01 · answer #5 · answered by aarenb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,,, I had phobias and my doctor gave me lexapro,, its very safe and very effective. Please see your family doctor they can help you.
2007-01-23 15:35:25 · answer #6 · answered by ncgirl 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋