Its now been over two years.... And for a while he hasn't said he loves me, he use to say it once a day when we would part our ways now when I mention the word he gets all figity.. Then when I ask him if he does still love me he says, he doesn' know what love is... EVEN thoung He use to say it alll the time. My Question is Why do guys say one thing before then later on the never say it again?? I really wish he would say it.
2007-01-23 13:47:20 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm over 17 and he is 20. And we are both attracted to one another, neither of us has "let ourselves go" I don't understand why its like how it is.
2007-01-23 14:03:57 · update #1
It would be impossible for him to have found another person as we live together and work at the same place, so we see each other everyday, and I say maybe its too much, he said he wouldn't have it any other way, and if he was to leave for another job he said he wants me to come with him. He's not a cheating type.
2007-01-23 14:16:51 · update #2
Because he's stupid. Move on and find someone that does love you. There ARE noce guys in the owrld. We're here!! It's just that most women don't like us because we're not a challange.
EDIT - He may not be the cheating type, but he sure sounds like the controlling type. You said if he leaves for another job "HE" wants you to come with him. What if you don't want to? What if you make more money than he does? What about your dreams, wishes, and desires? He's not considering that, and neither are you, or atleast you're not being vocal about it.
My best advice to you is -
1) Move out. Get your own place. Learn to be independant before you become dependant. You're way too young (Over 17 I believe you said?) to be where you are. Live your own life, not his.
2) You may love him, but is he really the best thing for you at this point in your life? He may be a really nice guy and treat you well, but is this what you really has aspirations for right after highschool? What about college? What about YOUR future. This shouldn't be about him, it should be about you at this point in time.
3) Let him go and move on. If he's unable to love you, then why do you hang around? Why would you stay somewhere that you're not wanted? You may be wanted to cook, clean, bada-bing bada-boom if you know what I'm saying, but are you really, and truly appreciated? Doesn't sound like it to me.
I'm sorry if this is not what you wanted to hear, but I think you need a wake up call. You're young, and he's not the only fish in the sea. Why limit yourself to a ham sandwhich when you can have a steak buffet?
2007-01-23 13:54:15 · answer #1 · answered by Jim C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first question is how old are you too. Men use the love or I love you words for one thing one thing only Read my LIps...TO GET INTO YOUR PANTS......He has had that and now he feels that he has made his catch. The bait has already been used why bait the hook again. He may show you that he still loves you by doing other things, but remember woman are all about their heart and feelings and men are about their head and I am not talking about the one on their shoulders. It is all phsycial with men. Using the I LOVE U is feelings that men are not comfortable using. If he is saying I do not know what love is...then perhaps he doesnot know what it is...hell I am 48 and still dont know what it is..and I was married for 25 yrs. Love is a different concept for each and every person. It is not the same for all.
2007-01-23 21:55:36 · answer #2 · answered by beetem@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many couples tend to say "I Love You" as a formality more than saying it when it truly matters. They'll say "I Love You" as often as we use "Hello" and "Goodbye". It becomes more of a cliche (something said often but never really thought through).
Now that his feelings for you has changed a bit he doesn't know how you'll take it when he says that he doesn't want to say that EVERYTIME you're in conversation with each other. It doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't love you, but maybe he'll just want to express and show his love for you more often than saying it on a regular basis.
2007-01-23 21:56:00 · answer #3 · answered by lenise1973 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like the fire has burned out of this relationship Honey.
Time to move on. He probably said it before because he felt it then, but this is now. If he isn't saying it now, then he isn't feeling it.
Ever hear that song by the Righteous Bros called "You've Lost that Loving Feeling"?
2007-01-23 21:55:14 · answer #4 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has been with you for a couple of years now. You KNOW that he Loves you. I KNOW the feeling however of wanting to hear it. Sit him down, look him in the eyes, hold his hands and tell him how good it makes you feel when he tells you he loves you. Be honest with him. Ask him if there's anything you can do to make it easier for him.
Good Luck and be Patient! He loves you believe me. You don't stay with someone for as long as you've been together without loving someone.
'-)
2007-01-23 21:54:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys get a little stand offish when they feel that they are in to deep in a relationship. Maybe he is scared of commitment. Maybe he doesn't want to lead you on. He may have loved you, but people change and situations change.Would you really want to hear "I love you" from someone who claims to not know what love is? You need to have a serious talk with him.
2007-01-23 21:53:46 · answer #6 · answered by CHICK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for you, this really sucks. You need to have a serious talk with him and let him know that this is hurting you.... if he doesn't do something to change this, you need to end the relationship before you invest anymore of your time or yourself with this guy. He sounds selfish. We all need to know that we are loved. Good luck to you.
2007-01-23 21:54:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well hon, you are too young to know what love is but i know what you are going through. He has found somebody else probably more his age and has something in common with . Let him go , it isd going to HURT LIKE HELL but you have to do it . Before you start another relationship , find yourself , find out what you are all about ! Before you can love somebody , really love somebody, you have to love yourself . So take time out for yourself and figure out WHO YOU ARE .
2007-01-23 22:12:49 · answer #8 · answered by spo_traveller 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is playing games with you. It is a power play. In order to even out your position, you will probably need to tell him what you want and be prepared to leave if he doesn't give it.
2007-01-23 21:52:05 · answer #9 · answered by artichoke 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all you should tell him how you feel. And secondly somthing has to have happened for his midset to change like this. Talk to him comfort him and if if none of that works tell him to get over himself.
2007-01-23 21:52:24 · answer #10 · answered by gotansas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋