I have a 3 yr old being beat up at day car everyday. She's very small and this girl bullies her everyday. HELP

Question

My daughter is 3 and weights 28 lbs the other girll is 3 and weighs 45lbs. Kicks, spits, slaps. punches bites. What are my options when it's the only daycare in town.

I have talked to both daycare and the mother who I work with. the mother thinks it's funny her child acts like her daddy who is prison. I don't abandon my child she's only there for 6 hrs and I'm 2 blocks away

my child is in taekwondo but does not think she should hit the other girl back because it's mean

Answer 1

It shouldn't matter how long you leave your child there... they should be safe while you are there. You have talked to the daycare teacher, and still nothing is being done? You need to have the teacher document what they are doing to help the "bully" get out of this habit. Have they made up a behavior plan to help modify this negative behavior? It should include such things as:
-What the negative behavior is- kick, spit, hit, bite
-What the staff is going to do to prevent the behaviors from happening- have one staff member assigned to "shadow" the child's every move, keep an eye out for incidents that might escalate, physically block the child when she goes to do one of the negative behaviors to another child.
-What positive behaviors the staff intend to teach the "bully"- how to ask other children to play, how to communicate when she wants something, etc.
-What sensory interventions they can do to help the child- give her chewy foods to help with the biting, give her deep pressure massages to help with the need to bump, hit, kick others...

Really, this is up to the staff to do. They need to be on top of this bullying. Talk to the teacher again, and see what they are going to do about it. Since this is happening at school, you need to allow the staff to handle it, but keep informed and ask for frequent updates, including written observations on the frequency of the incidents.

Answer 2

First of all I'm sorry that your little girl is going through this. Have you spoken to the daycare about this? They definitley need to get a grip on this, they should be trying to nip this behaviour in the bud. Unfortunately since it's the only daycare you don't have many options, does your daycare offer different rooms? If so you could have the daycare keep the two in different rooms. You could ask that the daycare have a worker stay with either your child or the other child to make sure nothing gets started. They should have someone that keeps an eye on the other girl and when she starts to act up, the helper should step in and show her how to properly deal with her feelings. Often children act out like this when they are bored, tired, hurt, angry, confused...maybe she has never been taught how to share. But I definitley think that you need to talk to the daycare about how to prevent this sort of thing from happening, you have every right in the world to help your child out. And if still nothing gets fixed then I would start looking for an in home daycare. Good Luck with everything.

Answer 3

Sorry to hear about your daughter. Before you took your daughter to that daycare did you meet with her ahead of time like interview her before you left your daughter there. That is what I do with my son. But with this other kid attacking her like this is wrong. If you haven't already I would address the issue with the parent and the daycare center. If your daughter has marks on her from this kid I would take pictures and keep them on file. Show them to the daycare and the parent of this kid. If necessary take her to the emergency room and send the parent/daycare the bill. Make sure you stress to the parent/daycare that charges will be made if this continues. I hope you don't live in too small of a town. Maybe you will have to move , change jobs, or drive out of your way for your daughters daycare. Good luck.

Answer 4

Yeah that's definitely not right. Not right at all. You may have to take legal action. You say it's the only daycare in town. How small of a town are we talking here? What about a daycare in a nearby city?

Answer 5

2 words, say this wih me : LAW SUIT. It is the day care's responsibiliy to provide a safe, stable environment for children who go there. A child who repeatedly harms other children should be kicked out, legally speaking. You do not have to put up with this behavior, and let the day care know that you do not have to. You have every right to call child protective services and lodge a complaint as well. They will then be investigated and possiblely shut down if they are not willing to comply with regulations. Just take to heart that the other mother's child will probablely end up in prison just like dear old dad if she isnt disciplined.

Answer 6

I don't know but this is unheard of. This cannot be a licensed daycare. This is ridiculous and you must take your daughter out of there. I know it's the only daycare in town but your daughter's safety and well-being are more important than ANYTHING. Take her out of there immediately. You may have to find a daycare that is further away but it will be well worth it.

Answer 7

Talk to the daycare teacher and the daycare owner about this. Tell them that this behavior is unacceptable. Talk to other parents if you can...and look into in-home daycares as another option for your child.

Answer 8

It's the daycare's job to ensure safety at all times of ur child, so i think u should speak to the director of the day care as well as the parents of the other child.

Answer 9

Have a talk with the director or your child's daycare teacher. They have to protect all the children there. If that doesn't work, go to the state about the problem. Good luck to you.

Answer 10

I would start kicking, spitting, slapping, punching, and biting the daycare provider and see how she likes it! It's the daycares responsibility to handle those kind of situations. Take that daycare to court!