Not sure if i posted before?
quotes from letters to islington council's housing department
"I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off."
"I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage."
"Their 18 year old son is continuously banging his balls against my fence."
"I wish to report that tiles are missing from the roof of the outside toilet and I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off."
"The lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?"
"I am writing on behalf of my sink which is coming away from the wall."
"Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant."
"I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen."
"Can you please tell me when the repairs will be done as my wife is about to become an expectant mother."
"I am still having trouble with smoke in my built in drawers."
"The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared."
"Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink."
"Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now it is in three pieces."
"Would you please send a man to repair my sprout. I am an old age pensioner and need it straight away."
"I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6am his **** wakes me up and it's getting too much."
"The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous."
"Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so will you please send someone around to do something about it."
"I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would be pleased if you could do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night."
"Please send a man with clean tools to finish the job and satisfy the wife."
"I have had the Clerk of the Works down on the floor six times, but still have no satisfaction."
"We are getting married in September and would like it in the garden before we move into the house."
"This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broken and we can't get BBC2."
2007-01-23 09:03:51 · 24 answers · asked by Tink 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Thank You very much I laughed so much I started coughing I haven't laughed in a long while.
2007-01-28 07:43:06 · answer #1 · answered by Bridget 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bit Cruel And Funny Abit.
2016-05-24 01:51:14 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would be pleased if you could do something about the noise made by the man I have on top of me every night."
that was the best 1 very funny
2007-01-27 06:20:54 · answer #3 · answered by hey 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Incredibly funny.
I find it surprising that some people don't realise what the are writing or are just to daft to realise-my mum however used to deliberately phrase her letters in such a way as she believed that if you could make the officials laugh-they would complete the repairs quicker for two reasons. them being-if they laugh they will remember you and the other being that on the whole people are nosey and would contact you just to see if you did anything else laughable whilst on the phone!
Cant say it worked-but the batty cow lived in hope!
2007-01-28 02:04:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
10 out of 10
2007-01-27 05:16:09 · answer #5 · answered by qwerty123456 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very funny
2007-01-28 02:27:09 · answer #6 · answered by Hawkeye 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could only happen in Islington. Well done.
2007-01-28 05:46:33 · answer #7 · answered by Whistler R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have struck gold with them tink love the first one 10 /10+
2007-01-23 09:16:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
great Tink I peed myself laughing
2007-01-28 02:23:41 · answer #9 · answered by srracvuee 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
would have known the americans wouldnt get it!!
very funny
2007-01-27 08:15:02 · answer #10 · answered by dossmanuk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋