Im pregnant and im having second thoughts if i should keep the baby.. will this just end my life ?

Question

im 1 month pregnant and im really starting to wonder if i really want a baby since im only 18,, im with the father and everything but im not sure if i want to be with him for thr rest of my life, and having this baby makes me wonder if my life is just over now? my body will be ruined etc... i really dont know what to do i was wondering if anyone had some helpful advice.

Answer 1

Maybe you should consider putting the baby up for adoption. Your body will rebound, don't worry about that. The baby is more important at this point.
There are a lot of people out ther that can't get pregnant (my friend has been trying for 4 years now) and want so desperately to have a baby.

Answer 2

I'm a little partial because I am against abortions.My reasoning behind this is because if you werent sure you wanted to be pregnant and have a baby you should have protected yourself.I know things can happen and no birth control is 100% fail proof.Now if you didnt do that then should you really kill a life that you foolishly created? Though abortion is not the only answer. You can always have the baby and give it up for adoption. You would be doing a wonderful thing for a family that may otherwise not be able to have kids.You never know by the time you have the baby you may change your mind.I dont know what the law is on adoption and changing your mind though. Your life is not totally over even if you do keep the baby.It will change dratsically yes but you can still do many of the things you could before.Though true you cant go out all the time and you would have to find a babysitter.As long as you excercise during pregnancy and eat right you body wont be ruined as you put it.Theres also excercising after you have the baby to get back in shape.So I am not quite sure what you consider ruined. But if you dont want the child I would not keep it but I would not recommend abortion because why kill a life that didnt ask to be conceived.You made the foolish mistake not it.

Answer 3

Call or go to a Planned Parenthood Place. Their advice is free. And they are more educated then most of the people who will give you answers on here. I assume this baby wasn't planned, don't feel ashamed. I was in the same situation (age and everything). Whether or not the father will be with you, isn't what you should be thinking. You need to look at what your goals in life are, and how this will change them. And by the way, your body doesn't have to be ruined. Cocco butter will help the stretch marks buy it at Sally's Beauty Supply a big bottle for $ 4.00, and rub it on your stomach, sides and chest everyday. You have to look at what you would want to do if you didn't keep the baby, could you live with an abortion, or would you need to give it up for adoption. There is open adoption where you can see your child and get pictures, but someone more capable will be the mother and father. You need to have a long, deep talk (which will be emotionally stressfull) with the father. Its not his choice in the end, but it does affect his life, and his opinon may change the way you feel. Having a baby is not the end of the world by any means. You decision has to fit you and only you, having a child wasn't for me, and I don't regret my decision. If you need to talk to someone more indepth you can email me at [e-mail]. I hope I helped a little.

Answer 4

OK, first of all, Motherhood is a gift, you have no idea how many women want to have babies and can't. Second of all, yeah your life as you know it might be over, but you are about to embark on a whole new life! motherhood! Once you here your baby cry for the first time or a giggle, you'll realize your life has a new purpose and direction and the best there is! You'll have company and a project, so many things...
OK about your body... look at Heidi Klum! she's had 3 babies (or 2, I can't remember) so just so you know it's all about discipline and taking care of yourself... because women get fat all the time and it's not always because of having babies...
Sure18 is young, but women have babies, and continue with their careers, get great jobs, etc...
If you set your mind to it, you can do it all, including motherhood, and believe me it will be an even better accomplishment!
Hope this helps. Talk to someone. Don't rush into any decisions, because this little baby inside you is a piece of your heart already!!! Never ever forget that.
I'll be praying for you, hope God gives you wisdom and strength...
God Bless you

Answer 5

Having a baby does change everything, but it's not all bad changes. Knowing that there is someone out there that completely depends on you makes you feel like you are actually worth something when you might be depressed. And your love for this baby will be so huge, it's something you can't imagine you have to actually experience it. On the other hand if you just can't feel good about making this step in life, please give the baby to someone that can't get pregnant themselves and have been waiting so long for a baby of their own. Is keeping your body perfect worth giving up this babys chance at life? Also take into consideration that you might just be having a hard time because the pregnancy hormones are messing with your body and mind.

Answer 6

Since you know that you are pregnant, you have a responsibility to more than yourself. You are carrying a baby. That child's heart is beating already, did you know that. You think that pregnancy can change your body- abortion can be very harmful to your body- you can have physical risks you may not hear about if you go to an abortion clinic- infections, pain, bleeding, and hormone problems. Also emotionally down the road you would remember taking the life of your child= how about adoption if you do not feel you are old enough to parent. I am adopted and have 2 adopted kids and I am SO thankful that our birth moms sacrificed so that we could have life, even when they knew that they could not raise us themselves. No your life is not over, it is just taking a turn that you were not expecting, but remember you chose to have sex and now you have a choice to make, I pray that you make the best one for you and your baby.

Answer 7

Hi, you got a lot of answers and some good advice. I had a totally unexpected pregnancy and it changed my life forever. I thought it was terrible at first since my career was ripped out from under me from getting pregnant. Anyway, what I realized was that absolutely nothing in life compares to the love of your child. I never knew that kind of love could exist. When I had her, I knew at that moment I was right where I needed to be. I was only working part time at Target, but was determined to make it work.

So many people are against public aid/welfare but do what you have to do - that is why it's there. You won't need it forever, just for a while. It might be embarassing, but don't feel bad about taking care of your child. Or think about adoption. Best of luck.

Answer 8

Please dont get rid of your baby! I had my first baby when i was 16 and my second when i was 18 i wouldnt change it for the world you can still be young and happy if not happier. i am 22 now i still look just as hot your body will come right back after one baby i promise i wish i could show you a pic a have 2 kids and get more compliments now then i did before .it made me have really nice boobs. but other than that i am succesful in my job have lots of freinds and make time still to go to the bars and hang out like twice a month my life did not end at all. i still get to have all those things but i get to top it off by watching my babies grow!! They make you so happy when they laugh my daughter is so amazing and my son is such a little man.I am still with there dad and we are happy, but you will learn that those are your kids and you will love them so much you could be mom and dad if need be.But this is me and you are you but your not gonna be 18 forever so dont kill this one just to have another later. Think real hard on this. and dont think for today cause its going fast think for the future..

Answer 9

Recognize that children do not end a woman's life, but enrich her life. A baby is a person, a gift, who needs to be loved and cared for. Accept responsibility for your gift. Your asking for advice may show that you are truly concerned for the life that is growing inside you, so good job asking for help if your motives are pure. You know you can talk to adoption agencies or take parenting classes. Becoming a mother so young might mean that you won't have the career you imagined, but being a mother means being a friend, a teacher, and a role model. What job could be more important?

Answer 10

Hi there,

Let me start out by saying that I commend you for speaking out about your fears of becoming a mother. You're not alone. Every mother has at one time or another felt the same fears that you're feeling right now. If you're not sure that you'll be able to handle the responsibility of being a mom, or that you won't be able to provide the best life possible for the baby---you do have other options. As far as I'm concerned though, abortion is out of the question. Please don't resort to abortion....you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

Adoption is a great option in this situation. There are so many wonderful married couples that are unable to have children and would love to adopt yours. Get in touch with a local adoption agency and get more information about adopting. If you decide that is the route you want to take, you will be completely involved in the screening of the applicants and you'll be able to meet with potential families that will adopt your baby and make the decision as to who you feel is fit to care for your child.

Another option is counseling. You may not feel prepared now, but you still have 8 months to become prepared for the birth of your child. Talk to your family and friends and express your concern, they will help you in any way they can to enjoy this pregnancy and your baby. With professional counseling you will be able to become more emotionally, mentally and physically prepared to be a mom.

As far as you feeling your life is over: It's just beginning!! God has blessed you with such a gift to have a child, and regardless of whether this baby was planned or an accident, you've got a little human inside of you that is depending on you for it's survival and to do what is best. Having a child (planned or un-planned) can be so rewarding. If you're not sure whether or not you're going to stay with the father for the rest of your life---just take things one day at a time and trust that everything will work out the way it needs to.

I hope this helps, and I know you'll make the best decision. Take care of yourself and God bless :)