My long distant bf said he has slept with a woman twice. And I'm a little angry to say the least, although we're not officially in a relationship and we never mentioned monogamy. He said that he doesn't want to put all his eggs in one basket i.e. saying that cuz he thinks I'm sleeping around that he doesn't want to get hurt and he knows I have a high sex drive and thinks I'm unfaithful. I told him I had slept with a guy to see his reaction, and then later told him I was joking, but he thinks I was serious. But why do you think he is sleeping with this girl? and how should I address this to him without appearing emotional?
2007-01-23 08:02:59 · 6 answers · asked by Jenny 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Trust me, a long distance relationship is just a guaranteed leg-over whenever they are around. One thing to respect (in light of the crime) is the fact he told you...But, is he actually sleeping with other girls or was he looking for a brake-up? Peoples sex drives and their fidelity are not often linked, so don't worry about what he thinks. As for the addressing him, be emotional, let him see (or hear?) that you are genuinely angry/ upset/ confused etc.. Make him suffer! One woman twice...Two balls, you do the math.!
p.s. Not smart "joking" about sleeping around, you gave him ammo for revenge!
Hope This Helps!
2007-01-23 08:19:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are not officially in a relationship and are not officially monogamous then you can be hurt but you cannot say him ( or you ) is being unfaithful. If there is no set of rules to play by then you can't break any!
He is sleeping with this girl because a) there is nothing to stop him b) you guys aren't REALLY in a relationship meaning he is not really your boyfriend and c) your joke about sleeping with someone else was a form of passive-aggressive cruelty that obviously hurt him and he is trying to show you he doesn't care or feel anything by acting out.
It seems to me that he DOES care,and that this should be a wake-up call to both of you to either solidify the relationship and actually commit to each other or to just agree to be friends.
2007-01-23 08:23:09 · answer #2 · answered by Namaste Nahmi 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"We under no circumstances said monogamy..." i have been stuck in this position previously. you don't need to point it --- it type of feels awkward --- yet you do not because you purely assume that "yeah, we will be cool...we will take the severe street at this level in our relationship" --- even though it continually bites you interior the *** interior the properly. any further, under no circumstances take the "cool severe street" till you both are particularly purely finding out the waters. once you change into connected, then tell him/her so. the different would say "yet..."...yet his/her "yet" ain't truly well worth the emotional devastation that takes position at the same time as this occurs. That piece of concepts is truly worth 10 James Bonds. and under no circumstances misinform get even or instruct a level...it doesn't make him/her jealous...it purely provides him/her the fairway mild to screw more suitable adult adult males/women folk.
2016-10-16 00:10:38 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not in a monogamous relationship you need to just get over it. Either you can accept it the way it is or not - your choice. You are the one that decided to do the long distance relationship and all the pitfalls that go with it . . . if you don't like it end it.
2007-01-23 08:10:10 · answer #4 · answered by lunasage 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm answering this mostly because I'd like to see Namaste in high heels and effusively thanking me (afterwards), basically. Other than that, to get to your question... get used to it. If you move closer to him, he'll do it behind your back. He'll do it this weekend, as it is. You might even be "the other woman" to another girlfriend, ever think about that?
2007-01-23 08:47:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's just not that into you. If he were, he wouldn't be sleeping with other women.
2007-01-23 08:12:32 · answer #6 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋