I Care For Her But?

Question

I just broke up with my GF last night because I caught her following me and when I asked her about it at first she lied, but once she realized I knew she came clean and said she saw me in the car with another girl. It was just a girl I'd met at a party, but I was mad that she lied to me. All I ever asked her to do was to not lie to me and she did. I know I've told lies in the past and I thought I could forgive her because I really care about her. She knows that other women call me so she's always looking at my phone when it rings & now she's following me. I love being with her, she's the one person I've spent the most time with but how can we get past our trust issues? She called me out on some lies and didn't know how she knew they were lies. It hurt to see her break down and cry but I can't deal with the little white lies. Was I wrong for leaving her like that? Should she get another chance or should I let go? I need advice please??

Answer 1

You have to decide if you want to give her another shot or not. Personally if you put yourself in her shoes I think that what she did is not right but is at least understandable.

You guys need to have an open and honest conversation about your trust issues. Or more specifically about her trust issues, she probably knows that she was acting crazy and lied without thinking about it because she wants to protect her image in your eyes.

I would tend to let that sort of thing go. If you love being with her then you need to acknowledge that you have a problem as couple and you need to work on that issue in a mature fashion.

She was being nosy and distrustful yes.. is this something that is insurmountable? no particularly if you are young and you sound young, I would try and work it out.

Good Luck.

Answer 2

Seriously, I am so sick of selfish men. What's with this double standard idiot? You should be apologizing to her for spending time with another single girl - especially one you just met! What are you doing in cars with strange single women asshole? How would you feel if your girlfriend left a party with a strange single man?

Get over yourself. You have obviously given her a reason to suspect you. Maybe the fact that single women are ringing your phone all the time would do it, huh? Dah.

When your in a committed relationship, you shouldn't be running around with strange single women and your female friendships should be kept at school or social scenes. Why are you maintaining telephone relationships with these other women?

You are obviously a man that doesn't know how to please a woman. And because of that - your relationship is suffering. White lies? Get over them - life's full of them. And let's face it - your a liar too. Tell me, had she not confronted you, but asked you later where you were that evening - would you have been honest? I doubt it.

You have ill intentions with these other women. Cut your poor girlfriend loose and save her from yourself. Your mad she lied? I'd be likely to toss you to the curb without one second thought if I caught you leaving a party with another girl.

Frankly, asshole - your lucky she even wants you. I wouldn't.

Answer 3

I hope my answer helps and makes sense. I think you guys just have communication problems. I am a girl, so I know how jealous we get. I think if you really care about her and you really don't think that is the best idea to break up, maybe you should call her and ask her if you guys can just sit down and tell eachother how both of you feel. Just start slow and take it from there.

Answer 4

You all need help on your trust issues and all.Try couples counseling.I don't think its just for those married.Thing is though if you have lied to her before that may be where her trust issues are coming from.How can you expect complete honesty from her if your not giving her the same in return.And why breakup with her over something you yourself have done?

Answer 5

Sorry, but this is a very unhealthy relationship. She doesn't trust you, and it sounds like she has every right not to. Why are other girls calling you, and why was there another girl in your car? It sounds like you are both better off with out each other. If you cared for her, you wouldn't have other girls calling you. And she shouldn't be lying to regardless. Move on! I know it is hard to let go sometimes, but why continue with this relationship?

Answer 6

Double standards can't work, you lie but she can't? And why are you hiding the fact that you are speaking with other wome unless you have other intentions? I don't blame her for not trusting in you, especially if she caught you in a few lies before. her lying about following you is nothing compared to what you have been up to.

Answer 7

what was that girl whom you met at a party doing in your car? and why wasn't your girlfriend with you at that party?

Have you been playing fair? If you make her feel secure with your actions she will never have a reason to spy on you.

If she is important to you you should go back to her and make sure she knows it. and do it soon.

If you want to play the field then continue what you've been doing. If I were your girlfriend I would have doubts about you just like she does. Your actions have not exactly inspired trust and confidence.

Good luck.

Answer 8

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Answer 9

She feels insecure. probably because other women call you and you have other women you met at parties in your car. and you've lied to her. if you're that type of person, do her a favor and let her go, especially if you say you care for her.

Answer 10

Well hunnie she's just too needy and demanding and trust me you don't need that on your back. I realize that you care for her but those kind of ppl never change. It's too much of a burden.
Good luck though