how do you get over losing a parent?

Question

My dad died in a tragic car accident and it is really hard to move on. I know where he is (in Heaven) but it's so hard

Answer 1

first of all you want to know how to move on NOT get over, because you will never get over losing a parent no matter how you try. to move on this is what i learned when my son died , there is only 2 roads to choose, and you have to pick one. there is a consequence for each one you pick..........the first one is death..as in your dying inside and your not motivated in life.you lay in bed and avoid the world as is turns. you stop eating normaly. but eat if you have friends around doing so. you drink abit more lcohol to hep you sleep. i can go on in negatives that your doing. but the end result is your dying of a brokn heart and it can lead to death for some or health problems. the seconds path of road is.. LIFE you choose to live... you force yourself up every dsay and do your regular routine. you eat to make sure you get helthy diet and for your emotional strength that is needed for pain inside. you go with your friends and try to laugh when something inlife ins funny or a joke. you cry when you need to to let the pain escape. you realize that life in everyminute counts and cherish the memorys for your father which he left you , . hold on to the dreams you have whe he comes to say good bye...(you know what im talking about) rent movies that are funny. be with friends as m uch as possible. and family of course. do yur regualr routine you did prior to his death.. last and most important. KNOW YOUR FATHER WANTED YOU to be happy and live to the fullest andmake him proud of your lifes accomplisments, you are now in trial and error of life. be strong your dad wants you to surrvive this.and he wants you to be HAPPY , if you dont he wont go to the other side untill you are safe and able to go on...
ps
i bought the book
EMBRACED BY THE LIGHT
by Betty Eaddie... this book is about a woman who died and survived she saw things we all wondered about. You will understand just where dad is........i bet you wont put the book down....iknow i didnt..........and i went on.........everyone must grieve or your not human, my dear you are human......god bless you be strong in this trial of life.......

Answer 2

There are no hard and fast rules for grieving - you just have to go with how you feel. You'll probably never fully get over losing your Dad but, in time, the pain will ease and you will move on. In the meantime, don't botle up your feelings - talk to family and friends about how you feel so you will have support around you at time you need it. And remember, other family members will be feeling the same as you, even if they don't show it, so be for them, too.
Good luck!

Answer 3

This is something that will never go away ... It does get better in time and you learn to live with the loss ... The best advice I can offer is ... Remember all the good times , Don't try to forget as this will only make it hurt more . Talk to some one you trust , Some one who will really listen ... even it's just a story . but never forget . Time is the only thing that will cure . I lost my dad 10 years ago last October , It still hurts but I have learned to smile when I think of him .

Answer 4

Losing someone you love especially a parent is a terrible thing. You just need to think of them as being in a better place and know they are watching over you. Talk to your dad at night when you say your prayers. Look at photographs of him and remember the happy times.

Answer 5

My condolences to you and your family... But you don't ever get over losing a parent. I am the baby of six children. I lost my mom on my 17th birthday and I am 26 now and it is still hard for me to even celebrate until this day. For about the first four or five years I didn't even celebrate my birthday I would just cry. For the last 4 years I have kinda gotten better at celebrating my birthday one year I woke up on my birthday and thought she would never had wanted that for me. It will be 11 years this year and every year it get a little easier I still put flowers on her grave site on my birthday and I still cry everytime I go but you will never get over you just grow from it. I hope you find this helpful

Answer 6

Welcome to the dead dads club. It sucks to be in it, but trust me, even though you will always miss him, it will get easier as time goes by. My dad died when I was 11. I talk to him out loud when no one else can hear me because I know he can, and it's nice to know that I am never alone. On his birthday I make his favorite pie (he wasn't a cake lover) and write him a letter about what happened in my life that year, even though I know he already knows. Christmas is hard, and the anniversary of his death is even harder, but I make sure and stay busy to keep my mind off it on those days. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this too. Remember that you are not alone what so ever, and don't be afraid to get professional help from a therapist or join a support group if you need to, that's what they are for. He loves you and he will protect you for the rest of your life.

Answer 7

It's hard, no matter when you lose a parent, but to lose one without warning, has got to be even harder. My heart goes out to you.

You probably won't ever "get over" it....to me, that means you forget or it somehow won't affect you....

I lost my mother to breast cancer when I was 13, and I still haven't gotten over it. Losing a parent lingers with you. When you go through different events in your life, there will be a lingering theme missing....your dad!

Take time for yourself, allow yourself to feel the devestation of losing him. Allow yourself to get mad, cry, talk to someone you trust about how hard it is for you.

Acceptance is about as close as you might get to "getting over it"....but you will come to terms with the loss. Knowing he's in heaven helps, because he can see you. Live a good life, one that will make him proud.

Answer 8

It is so much harder to handle Sudden situations, like this.
If you get depressed, remember to try to get something. I went on wellbutrin for a while.
Also, a therapist or someone to talk to.
Hang in there and try to keep yourself busy.
From experience, you could run yourself in the ground, so take care of your self. Sometimes, when we get down, we do not realize why we get down.
Find some good support groups, church and I strongly recommend a therapist. Everyone is different. I think if I would have had one for my situation, I could haved accepted a little faster.
At times it is hard, but not as hard as it used to be. You have to have your time to mourn and that is perfectly fine.
There are also books about death too.
Make a day every week to go out and enjoy life, do something you have always wanted to do, or something to releave stress.
Walk every day- even if you just need time to think and reflect.
Im sure your father is in a wonderful place, he would not want to see you down and blue.
Good luck - email or im if you would like or need someone to talk to.
Remember, we can not take the whole world under our belts, thats why we have friends. And sometimes we have to know when to reach out.
Try hanging out with someone who was also very close and hurting by this loss, maybe your mother, siblings? Talk and rehash memories.

You may expeirence trauma, and you can not fix that on your own sometimes, So accept that. When things happen sudden most of the affected people experience trauma. You jsut have to know how to handle it.

Answer 9

I started to fail in everything I did, school, my health, my social life. Its important not to do this. Talk to others how you are feeling, get a support system, write in a journal, and try to become closer with the rest of your family. It feels like you’re empty in your heart so try filling it with more love from others. Also, once I started working harder in everything I do I became a lot happier, make a friend, help a family member, and do well in your job and school. All these types of things will help you feel better, just don’t try to sit and be sad and let your life fall apart. Good luck and I’m sure your dad is watching over you and wants you to be happy.

Answer 10

I don't think you ever really get over losing a parent. In time, the wounds heal--but they are always there at the surface. However, you find with time that its not the thing that you're preoccupied with constantly. Just give yourself time, and be patient with you.

Answer 11

you dont ever get over loosing a parent. I lost my dad last year due to a massive heart attack. and i can tell you from experiance that you never get over it, you just accept the fact that he isnt here and you will move on. The hardest part is accepting the fact that your parent is dead. I remember when my dad died, it was the way he always said he wanted to go, watching a notre dame football game. And he was, but i was asleep when he suffered his heart attack and i couldnt help but feel that i was in a dream when my sister rushed into my room to tell me he stopped breathing. its hard to move on in life especially if you are very close to the parent that died. I was my daddy's little girl and i dont get along with my mom very well. But you never do get over this big of a life change, you simply have to accept it and move on knowing that your dad is always looking over you and even though hes not here physically, he's always in your heart and when you need him most, you have your memories. (one thing that i started doing was writing down all of my memories into a journal that my cousins bought me. It helps when i am feeling sad to look into my journal and remember all the good times i shared with my dad.)