I miss her already?

Question

Today, my 14 year old golden labrador had to be put down. It was done at home, and I stayed with her during he process until she passed away. I had been crying all day, she died about 11am, and we have buried her in the garden. I miss her terribly and the house feels so empty and quiet. Its only the last two days or so, she hasnt really been eating and she could stand up. In the night, the vet said she may have had a stroke because she had fouled and was lying in it (because she cant move) also, she was breathing funny and clearly wasnt happy, she always wags her tail when she sees us, but today, she was just an empty emotionless dog.She had lots of cancer that couldnt be operable, apparently labradors are prone to cancer. I am just so heartbroken. I didnt go into work, and we keep finding things of hers, and photos and makes me cry. When will it get easier? I dont want to forget her, but I feel guilty when I try to do other things to "take my mind off it" please no insensitive answer

I watched as they gave her the injection and hear the end her breathing went a bit faster, as she was trying to fight it, do you think this was the case? I really hope she didnt feel any pain, and just went to sleep. her eyes remained open. And she was warm for an hour. The vet said its an overdose of anasthetic and which will eventually stop her heart. The injection didnt stop her heart first did it? Then her eyes glazed over and she was still.

I WANT TO THANK MOSTLY EVERYONE FOR THEIR ANSWERS, THEY ARE ALL GOOD, AND I DONT KNOW WHICH ONE TO CHOOSE, SO I AM PUTTING IT UP TO THE VOTE. THANKYOU EVERYONE. X

oh and i hope nothing happens to someone close to the people who were so insensitive, then they'll know what it feels like and you will think maybe i shouldnt have been so horrible. (!)

Answer 1

Hi there, 14 years is a long time and its hard as she was part of your family. Dont rush yourself, your allowed to be upset. Her breathing going faster was nothing to do with her fighting it. You didnt want your best friend in pain so you did the right thing, shes free from pain and although shes no longer with you the meories will always be there. I have been there and it does get easier :)
Remember all the fun and happiness she bought you and rest knowing you definatly did the right thing.

Answer 2

First off I am very sorry for your loss. Your story brought tears to my eyes as well. Its been a long time since I have been involved in euthanasia. I am a Vet Tech and I worked at private clinics and at our local shelter, though I am in a different field now. Essentially yes the injection your dog was given was an overdose of anesthesia. She didn't feel any pain-the increased respiratory rate was just an effect of the solution-not your beloved pet fighting death. I only wish that if I was that ill someone would be kind enough to put me out of my misery

Pet owners would often ask me about their ailing friends "How will I know when?" My answer-"You will just know, there will be no question-you will know that "Sam" is not enjoying life anymore. And only you know what "Sam" does to enjoy life. And when he's not doing those things-its most likely time."

The pain does get better but you must give yourself time. A good book a friend gave me several years ago (not sure of the author)
"How to Survive the Loss of a Love" You will not forget her.

It was good that you stayed with her. It made her feel better, believe me and it was closure for you.


When the time is right consider another dog. You can never replace her but you can fill the space she left.

Answer 3

First, I want to tell you how sorry I am about your dog. Next, I think you did the best thing you could for your dog. You loved her enough to let her go and not suffer anymore. You need to think about all the happy times you had with her, not dwell on what you think she might have felt as she was dying. If she did feel anything, it would only be for a minute before she passed. You had 14 wonderful years with your dog, so it will take you a while for the pain and missing her to subside that you are feeling. Keep busy, and I do not mean to sound insensitive, but a new dog not meaning that this will replace her, but it will help with your grief. You also could volunteer at the animal shelter to help other animals that would use some love and attention.We have a little dog named Rosie that is 16 years old. We are having to face what you did today in the future. For now she is healthy and gets around good and is such a joy to us each day she is with us. As much as it hurts us to think about doing what you did today to her, it is better to not let her suffer when she is no longer the happy companion that she is now, and is in pain all the time. This wouldn't be fair repayment to her for all the wonderful hours of loyal love that she has given us. Blessings.

Answer 4

its nice to hear that you had that dog for so long i had my poodle and she died at 13 and that was 2 year ago and i still miss her now it will get better but the worse time is when you go out and then return home and that dear dog is not there to greet you but what you have to think about is that she had a good life and was loved and cared for so much that is the only thing you miss them so much why dont you go and get another dog and give another dog a good home you sound so kind and its good to hear that dog had such a good life my dogs are my life they are more loyal and loveing than some humans try to buck up and think that the dog had a good life and lived a good age that was because she was well look after and that is so nice to hear that try and go out might do you good i planted roses where my dog is buried in the garden because i think that the rose of which is called peace is so lovelly just like my dog was so why dont you go and buy a nice flower or a rose and plant it or a few as i did ant plant it where the dog is buried in the garden try to cheer up and think of all the good times you had with the dog take care and god bless what did i tell you animals are more loyal and loveing than some of the knobs on here just ignore them they need a slap with a dap

Answer 5

I have been through the same experience more than a decade ago and while time gives us other things in our lives to focus on it never takes away the pain. Time makes things easier but only because you are proccupied with "today" but as soon as you dwell on the past events it all come back and in reality its no less painful. I suggest that you develop some kind of ritual to say goodbye/show your Lab how much you thought of them- light incense, a candle or leave flowers or something and do this when ever you miss your Lab as it will help you come to terms with the loss. Sit and remember the good times and allow yourself to grieve but at the same time find something new to do in yur life to take up some of the excess time you have on your hands. By that I mean that if you dont have another dog you will notice the little things like not going for walks or even just not having to refilling water bowls, or buying dog food so find another distraction even if you visit someone regularly or some other thing that will get you out of the house a little and be a distraction. Keep a photo of your dog on a bench somewhere becasuse memories do fade with time but photos dont. Keep the collar and lead as later when its not so painful these items will bring back good memories not sorrow. Loosing a dog is like loosing amember of the family and you really need to go through a similar grieving process-give your self time and dont be hard on yourself your dog wouldnt want you to stop living or feel guilty about getting on with your life. So I suggest, dont be hard on yourself try some ritual way of remembering your dog, allow yourself to be upset after all you have lost a great friend, but do go out there find something perhaps not to be a distraction but to at least help you to keep moving through what has at the moment become a sad, dark world.
Good luck, my thoughts are with you.

Answer 6

I think almost every dog lover in the world goes through the heartache you are feeling now, I know I have and so has all my friends. You will never forget her I have photos of two of my dogs that had to be put down and remember them both fondly. We often think I won't keep another dog cause I don't want to go through this ever again. But each dog is like a person with their own separate personality and natures. The very best thing you can do is bring home a puppy as soon as possible and DONT compare it in any way to the dog you have just lost. No one should ever miss out on the love, loyalty and comfort a dog can give. In closing you have my total sympathies, take care.

Answer 7

My heart goes out to you! I had to have my dog put to sleep,that was 10 years ago and i still think about him!(despite later having another two dogs).I remember crying all the way home from the vets and all night too, and if ever i hear of anyone losing their dog i get all choked up again.It will get easier honestly, you will start to think of all the funny things she used to do and all the good times you had together, and the sad bits will fade away slightly.You will never forget her , she will always be in your memory as a member of the family , but time does heal!Just keep reminding yourself that you did your very best for her and you loved her till the end!

Answer 8

No sweetie she wasn't fighting it...that was just the medicine working. You did the right thing though it is so hard to do. She was suffering and would have starved to death. You saved her from suffering a horrible death. It is okay to cry. Don't feel guilty about trying to get your mind off of it...you have to keep going on and try to mourn when you can. Some people are insensitive and think she was only a dog. They don't realize people like us make our pets family. It is like mourning a child in a way. Let yourself cry and remember with the photos and toys...remember her when she was healthy.

Remember you did nothing wrong, you actually saved her a lot more pain. Time will help heal the pain but you will never forget the love you had for her or she for you.

Answer 9

OK [e-mail]

kel

Answer 10

First of all I am so very sorry for your loss. Trust me she was in no pain and was not fighting at the end. She would have been very relaxed and peaceful. Also you have done the right thing. She was suffering and had lost her usual quality of life. For a animal this itself is distressing as they know it is wrong to wee or poo indoors but she cant understand why she did it.
Last year we lost our Doberman (Shabba) the same way. He was 12. He became ill overnight, And we took him to the vet. He had fluid on his lungs and his heart was very weak. We brought him home and made the decision to have it done that day at home so we could be with him at the end and bury him in the garden. There would have been no suffering what so ever so put your mind at rest about that. It really is the best thing to do. They give us so much and rely on us to do what is in their best interest and you did. Dont be afraid to cry thats nothing to feel bad about. We took time off work too. 2 days. Then it is time for you to put normality back in your life and remember all the joy and happiness she brought you and find comfort in the thought that you did the best for her and was there with her at the end.

Answer 11

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know the pain of losing an animal. It has been almost a month since my baby boy died and I still walk around the house in a fog. His favorite toy, his bed, pictures, his collar and tags.....I find it hard still. I try to take comfort in the fact that he now has no pain and is at peace. I had no place to bury him so I had him cremated and I brought him home to "keep watch" as he had for the last 5 years. I have saved all of his things in a special place in my room, where I can go and visit with him.I can tell you it does get easier, although I have never forgotten any of my animals that i have lost. In time I know that we both will be able to think and talk about our animals without tears.
I'm sure that your dog felt no pain and was comforted that you were with her in her final minutes.