I was with a guy who wouldnt settle for the title but we did everything as a bf and gf k inda we were together but not i was "off limits but not taken" quote on quote of him. we had some serious fire and when things were good with us they were great. when they were bad they were miserable.
So one night when things were bad I went out with some girls and met this guy that was seriously instantaneous attractiion and every night we have sat and had tea and talk for hours i can see a huge future with this man possibly THE man.
and the old guy comes around this morning saying how much he loves me and that he will settle for commitment as long as I come back....?
go back to an old flame
or hurt the old flame and stay with the new?
2007-01-23 01:04:34 · 16 answers · asked by canthearu12 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do love him. but he is predictable i am gauarneteeing he will hurtme again. In all honesty my gut has been telling me to get away from him but i cant its like what do you do when you love someone but you know its all wrong?
2007-01-23 01:11:27 · update #1
First of all, the answer to your question should not be determined by what others have to say.
That being said, I get the impression you had a reason to go out with your girlfriends, and to have met this other guy, no matter how instantaneous or 'unplanned' it may have been.
Survival of the fittest comes to play. It is a fundamental concept concerning men and women.
Out with the old, in with the new.
BUT don't move too fast, the new man may just be playing you. If he doesn't work out, find another one, don't go back to the other one. Like you said, you had some miserable times with him, you don't deserve partial great, and partial miserable.
This is coming from a straight married man, btw.
2007-01-23 01:13:11 · answer #1 · answered by cko5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you able to identify the problem with your old flame ? Ask yourself if that problem will not arise with this one also. Sparks do happen often but after drowning mid way there might be chances of trying to wonder if life would have been better off with old flame itself. Do you know your new man well enough to know he is not taking advantage of your sittuation? Try to understand that when things are bad ,you start searching for something new and the deccision that you make may not be right . Try and stay away from all and see after a week if you still are thinking of old flame or your new man and then decide. You are out of one wreck, think twice before setting afloat on the next boat. All the best!!
2007-01-23 09:19:01 · answer #2 · answered by vengayu_2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why on earth would you even consider getting rid of the new guy for the one that did not work out??? He only wants you now because he can't have you. Besides - a guy saying he'll "settle for a commitment" is a long way from him telling you he loves you and can't believe what a fool he was to let you get away and he just can't live without you. Leave things they way they are - tell the old flame that the spark has gone out and you're not going back.
2007-01-23 09:14:21 · answer #3 · answered by lunasage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to be very smart to make that decision, if you made this question is because you still have feeling for that old love, so thinks about what do you like and dis-like of that old flame, and what made you be with this new love. sometime we just made mistake and end a relationship without thinking, maybe that hap pend to you and your old flame. just be honest with your self and with those two men, OK. don't play game because then you will end up alone. just make sure that the old love don't play you or leave you after all. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!
2007-01-23 09:17:55 · answer #4 · answered by RED ROSE 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your gonna have to go with your heart on this one. Decide if you can trust the old flame. And it does seem he is just giving in to get u back, but like he isn't very sincere. I don't know what to tell you except think hard about it.
2007-01-23 09:10:10 · answer #5 · answered by earthangel_candy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would stick with the new flame, future sounds a lot more positive. Your old boyfriend will have learned a hard lesson and maybe he'll treat his next girlfriend with more respect than he did you.
2007-01-23 09:11:24 · answer #6 · answered by chischas 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would stay with the new and forget the old. But nobody else can make that choice for u so my advice is follow ur heart to wherever it take u.
2007-01-23 09:11:13 · answer #7 · answered by fattybread_252 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The old flame had his chance and blew it*........now all of a sudden he's ready to commit* (thats hard to believe)
I would stay with the new flame......it may or may not workout....but kick the old flame to the curb.........it didn't bother him when he kicked you to the curb........what goes around comes around*
2007-01-23 09:09:22 · answer #8 · answered by friskymisty01 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The old bf will "settle"?....I don't think I'd give him the time of day. You need to explore this new attraction.
2007-01-23 09:09:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no. How could you ever go back. You stated "when things were bad they were miserable" and that should never be.
Stay with the one you are with
2007-01-23 09:11:37 · answer #10 · answered by Mike 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋