I am in love with two people at present, One is an ex boyfreind - who abandoned me, after i told him that i was abused as a child, He didnt keep in touch at all, infact 5 bithdays he never even wished me, I was however in touch with his best friend, who is now a good friend of mine, I was mainly in touch with his best friend cause it was my link to my ex...
aNYHOW i am suppose to get engaged in 2 weeks from now (formally) - Informlly - Ive put the ring on hold, tough the guy has asked me twice... and i said yes, but no rings till the formal one..
my present guy - He' s a very nice guy - Um, i actually fell in love with him months after knowing him, he tends to put my needs first, and he's everything i would want a man to be, He's never ever let me down - and once he even held my hand the whole night after i told him i was scared about what was going to happen, he sat and held my hand tellin me to relax
My question - who do i choose, and how? do i tell my fiance abt my ex?
2007-01-22 21:29:44 · 4 answers · asked by Almost Engaged 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
How do i decide? what all do i look at? what do i tell my ex?
IF YOU WERE ME, WHAT WOULD U DO??
2007-01-22 21:31:50 · update #1
It is totally natural to be "confused".... but don't you dare give this EX another chance let alone one more of your precious thoughts. Honey, he LEFT you! And for no good reason. Actually, he did you a huge favor! He left you so that you were ready to have this new guy in your life and accordiong to your own accounts he is a pretty amazing guy. Marriage is forever and who do you want there with you in "good times and bad"? A man who is willing to run when faced with something scary or uncertain OR a guy who is willing to hold your hand and help you through it???? I TOTALLY understand the allure of the man who left, it happened to me....but I married the man who "held my hand" and I have never EVER regretted it once! And this is the God honest truth, my feelings for him grow deeper and stronger with each passing day and we have been married for 10 years! I hope that I am wrong when I say this but it really struck me when I read your post....why did he leave after you told him about your childhood?? I would suspect that he may have mistreated someone else when they were young and saw that person in you when you confided in him. He had to deal with his own guilt and discomfort. So, he really did do you a favor and I suspect (like myself) that you will never once regret being with the real man here! NEVER! I wish you lots of luck and can totally appreciate what a difficult time this is putting all of your emotions and feelings in check right now. I hope that nothing but peace and happiness find you and your fiance! Best wishes....
2007-01-23 02:07:11 · answer #1 · answered by MaHaa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why are you holding on to a man who does not care about you? i could see if he expressed something that was remotely caring about you but as you state here there is nothing about the ex that is worth all this anguish.
you say you love the man who wants to marry you and yet you are obsessing over the man who walked out on you. that is not healthy and not a good way to walk into a marriage.
you need to do some soul searching and figure out what it is you really want, it is not fair to the man who wants to spend the rest of his life with you, if you cant let go of the ex emotionally.
2007-01-23 05:58:41 · answer #2 · answered by Cymbaline 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just forget your ex...... because to whom you are going to get engaged loves you alot and dont let him go............... if i were you i would have chosen the the guy who loves me not the one who left me after knowing about me!!!!!!! so give a thought about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! take care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-01-23 06:03:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOOK MY DEAR USE YOUR HEAD DON'T FOLLOW YOUR HEART, OR ELSE YOU MIGHT REGRET IN THE FUTURE ,
BE CAREFUL.
GOOD LUCK
2007-01-23 07:06:18 · answer #4 · answered by awana 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋