Should we tell our parents of destination wedding upon first meeting; they never met before .... tell them of our plans at first meeting?
My fiance and I have recently decided to have a destination wedding and not invite ANYONE, including our parents.
My parents divorced over 20 years ago and still HATE each other. Both have re-married since then.
My fiance's parents are still married and would really like us to have a TRADITIONAL wedding, as would my mother and my grandmother.
While they have an idea of our plans, we are thinking of having them (my mother and stepfather and his parents) meet for the first time for dinner and announce our wedding plan.
We think that they are less likely to get overly upset in the presence of future in-laws, and this will allow them to let the news settle in for a little while.
Is this an ambush to spring it on them like this, or a good idea, so we don't get a guilt trip?
2007-01-22 12:56:45 · 4 answers · asked by Advice Please 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
They have a VERY good idea that we are planning on doing this, but we have not told them for sure yet.
2007-01-22 13:05:47 · update #1
honey it your wedding so do what you wish plan it the way you want to it is your day and i would inform your parents that they need to get along for your day do not let anyone ruin one of most important days good luck
2007-01-22 13:11:55 · answer #1 · answered by mary m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's an ambush, so you have to put up with a few feelings of guilt, won't you feel even more guilty by doing this to them, even if they don't 'spring the guilt trip'? Let's face it, weddings aren't for the people getting married, they are for everyone else. We were going to do the same thing, but I am an only child, and we reconsidered and had a VERY SMALL wedding. I was under NO illusion that the wedding was for me, but if I was going to go thru with it, it was going to be small and I was going to have no problem remembering every guest's name! LOL
2007-01-22 13:04:58 · answer #2 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think what you are planning to do is ridiculous. If you want to elope, Elope and stop fussy footing around. Telling them what you are going to do is mean spirited. Example:
"We are getting married, far away, and you all aren't invited! Now, congratulate us."
Just elope and send out announcements. That's what people who don't want anyone at their wedding do.
2007-01-22 13:59:51 · answer #3 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you forget about this 'plan'!! Better you should elope and save them the expense--that should please them!
You, as a couple, will be happy and all the parents also.
2007-01-22 13:22:10 · answer #4 · answered by buster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋