always in and out of hospital, we are both 25 years old, he has childhood cancer. I really want to live my life and have fun, is it selfish? been together for 13 months
2007-01-22 12:19:33 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
No it's not selfish, it's just sad. You could remain really good friends or no?
2007-01-22 12:22:34 · answer #1 · answered by texas tornado 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey,
Being a person of experience on the other end of where you are, I would have to say that it depends on why you want to break up with him.
I was in and out of the hospital for about a year and a half and my boyfriend stayed with me to comfort me through it. It was really awesome to have his support and our relationship was strong to begin with so it lasted through the situation and we are still together today.
If you are just breaking up with him because he has health issues but you still love him and would marry him otherwise, then I think that that is selfish. Probably good, however, to find out your feelings about this type of thing now though before you take the vows. Perhaps though if you will break up with him because of this then you really didn't love him in the first place. In sickness and in health...
On the other side of the coin, if you do not love him and you do not see this relationship going anywhere, I don't think that it is selfish to breakup with him. His needs count, yes, and you might feel guilty breaking up with him while he is sick, but if you stay with him you would just be leading him on and that is not good. Your feelings count for something to.
So it could go either way, depending on your motivation for breaking up with him. Regardless of whether it is selfish or not, however, if you stay with him and you are having these feelings and you stay with him, you might resent him for the rest of your life and that won't do you or him any good.
Hope this helps,
Suzanne
2007-01-22 21:35:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is that why you are breaking it off? Selfish, well yeah, but you have to be in this situation. Would you want someone to stay with you just because you were sick? Not at all!! If you stay with him because you feel bad for leaving him then you'll end up resenting him down the road.
2007-01-22 20:23:29 · answer #3 · answered by blhenne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it is selfish.. if you 2 have been together that long and you just decide to break up with him when he needs you most it is VERY selfish. Im not trying to be mean or make you mad but he really needs you.. your probably why hes fighting it.. just try and work things out and if your heart really isnt in it then let him go
2007-01-22 21:10:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, its not selfish at all. Just explain to him, that you need your life too. You havnt been together all that long. And obviously if youre asking if its selfish, then your thinking about doing it anyways. You shouldnt stay with someone, if youre thinking maybe you shouldn't.
2007-01-22 21:24:51 · answer #5 · answered by hayray 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not selfish. If you stay with him you are eventually going to end up resenting him, which is only going to hurt him more and fill you with more guilt.
It's better to be honest with him and end it now - it'll spare both of you a lot of trouble.
2007-01-22 20:23:22 · answer #6 · answered by Delvala 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might be worse to stay with him and resent him. You won't be the supportive girlfriend he will expect. But if you break up amicably, you might be able to keep a friendship and offer support when he needs some.
2007-01-22 20:23:03 · answer #7 · answered by sci55 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An unfortunate sitution, but you have a life and needs as well.
If you like reading, ever read "Lady Chatterly's Lover"???
2007-01-22 20:24:27 · answer #8 · answered by waynebudd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, according to one of my ex girlfriends it isn't. She waited until I got pneumonia and then kicked me out.
2007-01-22 20:26:35 · answer #9 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not selfish ,just kick when down
2007-01-22 21:22:43 · answer #10 · answered by moco 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋