Should I punish my child for refusing to attend church?

Question

By the way, she is almost 12.

My other children don't refuse, and its kinda like she always has to be different.

Answer 1

This is a hard question. The easy answer is force them to but I have a child that makes so much noise it is impossible to take him at this time. I guess you could find something that he hates to do like mowing the grass or cleaning up the dog poop in the yard and tell him if he doesn't want to go then he can do these things instead.

Answer 2

What would punishment acheive? Will it promote the child's love of God? If the answer is not favorable, then I say it is okay to make the child go to church (like you make them go to bed and school). You are there to train your child, when they are adults you can not stop them from making their own decisions but you can try to push them in the right direction. I do say you should talk openly with your child. Are they bored or not getting anything out of service? Is the service too long? Maybe a church that has a better youth program would be helpful. God bless.

Answer 3

Well, I'd talk to her first about it and find out why she refuses to go. Does she disagree with the teachings or the beliefs. I think at 12 she is entitled to start exploring her own belief system, but that she should be studying something. Other cultures or religions or spiritual beliefs, to see what she does and does not agree with.

If, on the other hand, she's just too lazy to get out of bed in the morning, you should not punish her, but you should require her to attend.

Laziness is no excuse, but a genuine lack of belief is...as long as she is willing to put some effort into exploring other beliefs.

Answer 4

As a child, I remember finding Sunday School interesting. It was the one place in my week where people actually talked about interesting things. Needless to say, I was never forced. It wasn't until I started attending High School that I found conversation that was more interesting than what I was getting in church. Kuma

Answer 5

It amazes me how many of you as a parent come up with so many excuses as to why a child should not be forced to go to church. Unbelievable, this is the reason why so many kids do not want to go to church because the parent is lazy and doesn t instill values and morals to their children. There shouldn t even be a matter of negotiating as to why they do not go to church. Simply if you raise your children well, then they will know that getting up every Sunday is a day of obligation for our Lord. It s great how you buy them everything and they seem to be satisfied with things in this materialistic world and they seem to be okay with it, but can t seem to devote 1 hour once a week to our Lord. Shame on every parent that allow this form of behavior to fall upon their children.

Answer 6

How old are they?

Honestly, I don't think a child should be punished for not attending church. Reason being:

It forces a person to have their God. They do it because they were told to.

They have to go because they *want* to.

A lot of teens rebel from church and things like that because they were always forced when they were younger.

Still raise him/her in love and make sure you are keeping in your beliefs, and not making it "just a Sunday/Saturday" Thing.

Heh...yeah I don't have much.

Answer 7

no. if your child is young and just doesn't want to go, that should be an easily fixed situation; just take your child. ask why your child doesn't want to go. if it's just out of boredom, explain to your child that all of you have to go. it's only for a short period of time, and it's only once a week. it really isn't much to ask at all. that may be the only time your family gets to spend together, and even if you have family time regularly, explain that it means a lot to you to have that time in church together. if your child is older and is refusing to go for a different reason, you should take the time to find out what that reason is. that way you can come to understand their point of view. if they do not wish to go because they do not believe in God, or do not agree with the teachings of your church, maybe you can just ask them to join you because it still means a lot to you that the family get together for that short period of time. you shouldn't lose your temper if your child does not agree with the church, and does not wish to go. punishing your child will not solve anything. you need to just listen and come to understand where they're coming from, so to speak. again, if this is a younger child, calmly explain that he or she needs to attend church with the family. hope this helps!

Answer 8

You gotta be kidding me. What kind of church do you go to and why? and how old is this child and what is the level of your relationship with your child. If anything, you might want to reflect why you should think you have to punish your child for refusing to go with you. Go to church, with or without your child. Allow your heart and soul to be filled with the blessings that will allow you to communicate with your child without bringing punishment or force into question when issues need to be resolved. When you speak to your child, don't argue and don't let emotions rule the conversation. If you do things with your kids that are important to them, your kids will want to do things with you that are important to you as well. Kindness, pass it on.

Answer 9

Your child is a preteen. Preteens and teens are finding their place in the world, and this includes how their faith fits into it. You should not punish someone for this. They need their own time to find their path in life. Have patience, your child will let you know when they have found where faith fits in :)

Answer 10

no, maybe your child grasped on to new beliefs (though it depends on the age). Your child might not want to go because he/she isn't comfortable there. Plus, if you punish him/her than they will look at church as a requirement for life, when they grow up they might not want to go to Church or convert to something, but they would feel an obligation to the church. Plus, if you make them go to church than they would feel that church is a duties and go to church because they have to and not because of awe and respect to God.