I am Catholic and I recently started dating an Israeli which is difficult not only because we are getting to know each other but because we are too different religions and cultures. He says that religious differences are not an issue for him and that we are dating exclusively but he's made no attempt to introduce me to anyone in his circle and seems disinterested in doing anything with my circle. Should I continue to pursue this?
2007-01-22 09:57:23 · 12 answers · asked by wondering 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We've been dating for several months
2007-01-22 10:02:15 · update #1
i am Israeli so i can tel you something. first of all. Christians and Jewishness are very similar, so this is not the point.
Israeli culture and American culture are the same. very European
with a touch of chili. you tell us that you are dating for a very short time, so, may be the first step is learn the inner circle (you and him) and then,widen this circle, yours and hers. after all, now you are dating with im, and not with all the clan.
2007-01-22 10:11:59 · answer #1 · answered by MONI 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My answer would be to move on..
He may not care about your religious affiliation, but his family does and will. There will be a whole lot of stress dealing with his family. Lets face it, your family probably wont like the idea either.
I suspect you dont plan to celebrate the Jewish holidays with him, and if you have children together, he and his family will want to.
He is obviously giving you the hint that it will go no where, because he is not interested in being a part of your circle, and he really doesnt want you in his.
Move on.. before you get too emotionally attached.
Unless that is, you want to convert to Judiasm... My guess is that you wont, and neither will your family. Its hard to convert anyway.
good luck
2007-01-22 18:04:54 · answer #2 · answered by Dawn H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lyI'm an atheist married to an American Jewish woman.
For me, religion only really becomes an issue if you have children, then those differences become important. I find it hard to support my wife in raising my children with a belief in god as I do not have those beliefs. (Incidentally, I was raised as a church attending catholic).
I would suggest that if you have strong religious convictions and aren't willing to change religions, then maybe don't get to serious. The test of this is to ask yourself if you wold be happy to have your children raised as Jews. If the answer is no, you could hardly expect your partner to accept having their children raised in your religion.
P.S. Clearly the real answer is to accept that both religions are silly and become an atheist. (Just kidding, but we are accepting new members).
2007-01-22 18:10:34 · answer #3 · answered by GERARD 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That right your dating and getting a feel for each that OK, but when it comes to future yes there is big problem. Religion is a big factor in a marriage so don't let people fool you and say it's not because it is. Meeting his group of friends right now is no big thing don't make an issue out of it just take it slow. If he not ready to meet your then let it go, you will know when the time is right for him to meet your friends.
2007-01-22 18:04:57 · answer #4 · answered by rma2ks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell yeah, you should consider to pursue it. My Catholic mother married my Jewish and Israeli father. The cultural exchange is fascinating, and I know the culture shock is difficult, but it's way worth it. There's nothing wrong with being a Cashew(half Catholic half Jewish)!
2007-01-23 00:31:07 · answer #5 · answered by yessie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not get rid of the damn religion thing all together?
It's great that you two like/love each other and that should be all that matters. If you or he can't look past the religion then you weren't meant to be together.
I like both Catholics and Jews but enough is enough.
2007-01-22 18:03:36 · answer #6 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's dating YOU, not your "circle"... but if the relationship gets serious he should make an effort to get to know the people who are important to you, and vice versa.
I know many interfaith couple who have succesfully found ways to merge and celebrate the traditions and beliefs of both faiths... if you're willing to work at for the sake of love, it is possible.
2007-01-22 18:02:15 · answer #7 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chances are he's a secular Jew--kind of like a Christian that only goes to church on Christmas and Easter. However, the Jewish faith is very much based in tradition. All Jewish mothers want their Jewish boys to marry a Jewish girl. If you haven't met his friends yet, chances are he's afraid of his Jewish Mother. Express your concern, and also willingness to get to know his family, etc. Besides, Israel is BEAUTIFUL in October.
2007-01-22 18:01:44 · answer #8 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
nope...I'm A catholic too...i used to date a Jehovah's believer...too much conflict and headache....can you imagine how they put DOWN what we believed....i was born race to be catholic AND I'LL BE PROUD AND DIE TO BE ONE...
in your situation if this guy think that your religion is not a big deal....well go for it!!! good luck
beside THERE'S A RED FLAG ALREADY...HIM NOT INTRODUCING YOU.
2007-01-22 18:05:22 · answer #9 · answered by angel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been dating?
2007-01-22 18:00:00 · answer #10 · answered by Cerebal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋