My ex husband and I have supported our 22 yare old daughter, her boyfriend and their now 16 month old grandchild for 2 and 1/2 years now. She probably got pregnant here. My ex and I still jointly own a duplex. I live upstairs and he lives down. When the baby was born, I drove them to the hospital and coached. I have provided food, clothing, toys etc since before her birth. Everytime my daughter gets mad at me, she withholds access to my granddaughter, the longest being 4 months. I am the only one they trust to "babysit". They now live with my ex but I haven't seen the baby since November. The only time they bother with me is if they need a sitter or I have a little extra money. I bought clothing for them all in Nov. as well as "Santa" gifts. My ex is so fed up he's ready to sell the house. A problem as he's will to provide me with accomodation but not support (I'm on a long term disability). MY mother says I should mind my MOYB. Help, I really miss her.
2007-01-22 09:22:29 · 10 answers · asked by hugsnkisses 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I will share with you the sad truth I learned when my wife & I had a falling out with our son, & his wife, & we didn't get to see our grandaughter for a while. The sad truth is that we grandparents don't really have much in the way of rights when it come to grandkids.
For a while there we couldn't get to see our grandaughter without her parents constantly around supervising every moment we were with her.
Now all of a sudden our son's wife gets a job, & needs a baby sitter. Now that it's convenient for them it's OK for us to be alone with our grandaughter so that they don't have to pay for child care. I feel like we are just doormats for them.
I want to tell them to just go stick it everytime they ask me to babysit, but then I have to remember that at least this way I'm getting what I wanted, which is a chance to spend time with my grandaughter without those two trailing around behind like I'm some sort of axe murderer or something.
For Christmas we showered gifts on my son, his wife, & of course our grandaughter. I have given them countless hours of free child care, use up tanks of gas going to & from for them & for Christmas my son gave me a cheap pocket knife. (Absolute truth!) For birthdays etc I usually get a T-shirt.
All I can say is that we grandparents have to grin & bear it. We are expected to give, give, give, & we smile when we get a few scraps in return.
For me the big pay-off is when I get to spend the valuable time with our grandaughter.
If you aren't even getting that, then I would suggest that you start to squawk, & let everybody know that you want some time with your grandaughter.
2007-01-22 09:45:28 · answer #1 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious she is holding a grudge against you. Can you write her a letter or send her an email? if neither of those are an option then I suggest you get another family member perhaps a very big brawny guy and go and see Kerri personally. You will most likely have to do this face to face and get tot eh root of the problem. If you know for a fact you did nothing to upset your daughter then I would bet the boyfriend is controlling her to cut ties with her family so he can manipulate her better. I hope things work out for you. good luck
2016-05-23 22:41:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are being taking advantage of. I know it’s probably hard but your daughter is adult with a child of her own I think its past time she stop depending on her mother so much. You shouldn’t help them out as much I could understand if it was a little but as I said it seems they are taking great advantage of you. It’s quite sad it seems she is using her daughter as pawn.
As far as visitation I suppose you could go to court. Grandparent’s visitation rights vary from state to state.
2007-01-22 10:21:52 · answer #3 · answered by Spread Peace and Love 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell ur daughter how u feel. try not 2 get her mad. Talk about it 2 ur daughter. See her side if the story. Ince u know wat ur doin wrong u can fix it. Tell ur daughter to get a job or a part time job to
earn money. She shouldnt be goin 2 u 4 money anymore!
2007-01-22 09:47:13 · answer #4 · answered by CurlsWithBrains 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should stop helping them out all the time.
If they loved you and appreciated all the help that you have given them they would not stop you from seeing your grandchild.
It sounds like they are user's that expect everything to come from someone else, which is extremely selfish.
They will always be like this if you give in to them.
Make your daughter appreciate you for who you are not what you can give her.
2007-01-22 09:29:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel sorry for you. Your daughter sounds like a baby herself. I don't know what grand parental rights are.
Good luck to you.
2007-01-22 09:33:07 · answer #6 · answered by Dizney 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her / them and let them know that it is unfair to their child to involve her in your squabbles but withholding her from you. I would also NOT just be a babysitter when needed if I couldnt have access to her otherwise. They both should be ashamed of themselves for that.
2007-01-22 09:26:58 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
life is to short to hold grudges the is such think as going to court to get some access ifeven if your as grand parent good luck
2007-01-22 09:26:48 · answer #8 · answered by bigbreastedbitch1979 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to get yourself a lawyer, and go to court for grandparental visitation rights.
2007-01-22 09:26:04 · answer #9 · answered by lynda 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have too take her to court for grandparent visting rights i know its your daughter but thats also your grandchild
2007-01-22 09:29:32 · answer #10 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋