How do i stop my girlfriend from going clubbing?

Question

My girlfriend just turned 21, and so now she's discovering the magical world of clubbing!! the problem is that i'm dead tired on thursday nights, when she goes, and i don't really want her going to different clubs, for the simple fact that i don't know what she's doing. i know, it sounds like i'm a control freak, but on the contrary, i'm not. i just want to spend some "us" time watching a movie, etc. etc. yet, i don't want it to seem like i'm telling her what to do. should i just let her ride the wave? also, she wants to work at Coyote Ugly...don't get me wrong, that's hot, but not when it's your girlfriend, and guys need to take body shots off her, while she's holding the lime in her mouth!!! what can i do to make her not apply?

Answer 1

You don't stop her. She has free will. If you two are into different things, then maybe you need to evaluate why you are together. You can't control her, and if it bothers her then you need to move on.

Answer 2

All you can do is sit down with her and have a heart to heart open and honest communication session. Tell her how you feel about it. Let her express how she feels and see if you can come to any compromise. Tell her what you feel comfortable letting her do and why. If you tell her absolutely what you do not want her to do, she will become defensive as I would, and you will get no where and probably will not have a girlfriend. I have seen the girls apply for Coyote Ugly on TV and they have to really work hard at getting it. She may not make it, but then again, she may make it. You would have to have full trust in your relationship.

Tell her how you feel about her clubbing, honestly feel. Tell her how you would feel about her making it to Coyote Ugly if the guys drank off of her. Ask her how she would feel if the roles were reversed.

You have to be honest with her and maybe she will be able to come up with something with you together. Best wishes to you.

Answer 3

First off, if you haven't done so yet, try sitting down and talking to her about the way you feel. Also keep in mind that she is just 21 and what she is doing right now is pretty normal for most females of this age....eventually she'll get bored with the club scene....and if she doesn't, and her behavior continues in this manner then it pretty much sounds like you're in this relationship by yourself. Relationships are about compromise, it's never just one sided. I'm sure if the tables were turned she wouldn't like it and that is something she should think about.

Answer 4

Wild child!
I seem to get involved with those types myself.
If you want to stay with her you have to endure all that she does--good luck there, it'll drive you crazy.
If you're the type that wants to stay at home watching movies and she wants to be a wild animal out partying she isn't for you. Tell her that you do not approve of her 'Girls Gone Wild' behavior and that she's going to lose you. She'll probably bolt on you after you lay the law down.
You do what you think is right and just try to be the best person you can be--if she doesn't appreciate you you might have to ask yourself if it's worth putting up with all that grief.

Answer 5

well this really isnt up to you, she has to stop doing these things because she wants too......My advice is that if you known what kind of female she was before you got involved with her then you shouldnt have started the relationship. If she went to the clubs before you, she will definitely go while you are there and even after you unless she wants to change herself.......On the other hand, you can tell her how you feel about the situation to see if she is willing to compromise or give up certain things based on your feelings but all i can say on that is, good luck

Answer 6

you need to be honest about your worries and feelings and let her know. is that the only night you see her? or do you see her every day and you want thursday night to be movie night? cause if thats every night, then she might just be bored and wants to go have some fun at the clubs.

as for her working there, if she looks good, its a good job, and she can make lots of tips. she's probably only thinking about the money, not the guys. and besides, if some guy does something inappropriate, the bouncers will take care of it.

other than that, just let her know how you feel.

Answer 7

To me? She's not your Girl. Sounds like she's dating The Clubs. She's only got you to be her Date of the evening. Either play 2nd Fiddle. Or go look for your own emotion. Once she grows up. She'll be able to figure out how she feels about you.

Answer 8

You can't control what your gf does. Even on those Thursdays when you are dead dog tired, you still need to get up and go with her. That way the two of you can dictate when it is time to go home. If she wants to work at coyote ugly, let her try for the part, she may or may not get it. If your gf is attractive she is getting looked at all the time right now. You need to be supportive of her if you love her.

Answer 9

The best thing you can do is support her. Maybe once and awhile go out with her, and let her have her night with the girls. If its something she wants to do she will do it, with your permission or behind your back, or maybe even without you.

And you may justify it anyway you want but this is a controlling behavior its also sounds like a lack of trust / confidence she'll come back to you.

Answer 10

Talk to her and tell her that you are uncomfortable with it (the clubbing and Coyote Ugly). She will come around if she really wants to help you out. If she gets a job at a club -- she won't want to spend her free time there!