On dating etiquette, when do you think is a good time to bring up the subject of marriage? Do you wait until?

Question

you are serious enough to want to marry the person and you think they love you enough that he/she will probably say yes?

Answer 1

I agree with all of the above - But the wise Man should build his/her house upon the rock (Truth.)
Therefore I would not date twice someone afraid of an obvious and honest question; I would not sleep (ie. stay awake ) with anyone that was not atleast a prospect in my mind of a person I could have the possibility of a future with......As that is the truth of what would be on my mind....if they wont even entertain the thought ...then our motives are intrisically different....I looking for Love they looking for something of less value..... I don't accept that I'm a disposable commodity and my love most certainly is not built on fear...So stuff.. Etiquette !!! is my vote and ask yourself why you asked this question.x

Answer 2

After dating a few times it is acceptable to discuss marriage in general terms without relating it to your relationship with the person you are out with. Whether or not the two of you should continue to see each other and take a chance on becoming serious depends a lot on how the two of you feel about important topics. You can also have mature discussions about religion, money, or any thing else that is important to you. That is what dating is SUPPOSED to be about. Not just deciding on whether or not to go to bed together.

Answer 3

If you date someone for awhile, odds are the topic will come up naturally. Friends and relatives will get married (or divorced), and conversation will flow from there. If one or both of you are avoiding any mention of the dreaded "M" word, then there is a problem. But I wouldn't go out of my way to bring it up, just let things take their own course.

Answer 4

I completely agree with biogirl and puzzler. My buddy was dating this girl recently who told me that when they went out on a date, she brought up the subject of marriage and that he thought she was a little too nuts because he thinks she secretly wants to get married and is desperately finding Mister Right.

I asked him what she said exactly and he said they were watching Runaway bride and she then asked him what he thought about marriage. I told him i thought that was a perfectly normal question and it didn't sound like she was trying to sugar-coat anything but rather he was the one that was too sesitive and it sounds like maybe a little too afraid of committment and women in general. He then told me I didn't know what I was talking about and was reading too many psycholgy books. We haven't talked since. Oh well. His loss- not mine.

You need to bring up the subject of marriage, if you are marriage-minded, not necessarily on the first date, but much sooner than the point where you are seriously in love with eachother but have never talked about kids, if you believe in spanking, private or public schools, what religion to raise them in or denomination. Many people suddenly get religious when they have children and are very adamant about raising them in the church they were raised in, something that may not be obvious at all until they are looking at parenthood. They may say they are Christian but rarely go to church. Problems like this usually arise when Catholics date Protestants. Everything goes fine until they start seriously talking about children. Neither one will budge, they end having a tearful break-up with a baby being raised by seperate parents.

I for one, am native American, like many, of course, in this country. but I am serious about the culture of my roots and would not have a "white", Christian wedding but one in the native style. Many people will say they have "Indian" in them but were raised Christian just like I was . They also say they respect their native heritage, just like I do. But when it comes to weddings, that is where our similarities end. These women would likey want to get married in the church they grew up in, etc. and may think my idea of marriage a bit too extreme. This is something may never come up until we bring up the subject of marriage and if we do not see eye to eye on this, we could not stay together no matter how happy we were together because this would be too important at least to me.

I hope this helps.