I was the one being left and he was the one crying?

Question

For the past 2 months my boyfriend and I have been having a lot of issues. One day it would be really great between us and the next it would be very unstable. With that being said and without going into all the details. The day after chistmas we had a very bad day and for the first time he mentioned leaving. Well the next day while I was at work he got up and started packing. By the time I returned home he was 90% packed, I didnt have a clue all day long. So when I asked what was going on he was able to get about 3 words out and then started balling like a baby. (In the 2 years i have known this guy I never saw him cry.) I myself was in shocked and in a defensive mood. We shood there for 1 hour while I tried to wrap my head around what was going on and the whole time he was crying. It was a civil as they get break ups with no yelling or screaming. But What I dont get is he was the one leaving but he was the one crying and wanting a hug before we parted? Can any one explain why?

I should add that when we were together in the good time even 2 days before the break up everything was great, and even though we had spats it was like nothing could come between us. The main issue was he was shutting me out and pretty much stopped talking about the important issues and i would get emotionaly upset because I felt like I was the only one carrying the partnership. When I got like that he still did not have any answers, just said he needed time to think. This went on and off for 2 months. On the days inbetween nothing could stop us, or so thats how it felt. Yes, we did have our little issues like everyone. But the one night he started to actaully talk and share the next day he packed and left. So lets just say in the long run the only answer i have is that he threw in the towl and walked away crying. I am over the break up by now, or i should say im getting closer but the crying part still has me stumped.

The love and chemistry between us was like majic and this whole thing started and ended in a blink of an eye. We could be together, be a part, love, work together.. we had it all ... or so it seemed. We had hit hard times where he had been off work for several months and im sure that was the start of the down fall and it seem like the harder i tried to take care of things the more he pulled away. I asked him once 2 months before the end if he was thinking break up.. he said yes, but never did or said anything about it and I just countinued on. I know i wont get any answers now from him as to why. And Im not going to go on and say it shouldnt have ended, even though i loved him with all my heart and still somewhat do. But for him to be crying still makes me wonder. Almost like he was given a choice beween me and something else, what i dont know.. but thats what my friend thinks.

Answer 1

Something is going on in his life that you don't have have a clue about and he can't verbalize it to you. For some men it is very difficult to get what they are going though out. Either he had some issues from the past or maybe he feels guilty about something he has done behind your back. Either way maybe it is best that he is gone and maybe one day he will tell you what it was.

Answer 2

It sounds like he may care a whole lot about you, but for whatever reason he is not in love with you. He more than likely knows that he is hurting you and can't figure out why he does not love you in the way that his head wants. I left a relationship once and it was way harder for me, because the person really was and is gr8, and I really cared a lot about I just simply could not love the person in the way that I should for a romantic relationship. I was scared that while hurting the person I would lose them forever and that made me scared and sad.

Answer 3

maybe he honestly loves you and knew in his heart it wasnt going to work, and he didnt want to keep going cause he knew there was going to be to many bad days.

Answer 4

He deff still has feelings for you.