Me and my BF are both christians. We slipped in our faith and slept together, but now he's not only an important member of the church but he's also the pastor and it's hard to preach one thing and be living something else. it's not just sex though, we always make love and have such a special connection. But we need to stop and i don't know how. Please help!!
2007-01-22 05:09:08 · 19 answers · asked by blueleo_86 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
u may have to cheat
2007-01-22 05:22:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...seems that you cannot get away fro m the religion thing here ....so maybe you can ask him about this little thing called repentance. Ask him what it means to him? Ask him if he really loves and respects you, then would he help you repent and show your love for him in another way..Atleast until you are both married and your relationship sealed under a covenant with God.
Now a relationship need not be covenanted with God in all cases but I am assuming that since he is a pastor that is desire.
If he will not work with you..and will not give you a definitive answer as to what repentance is relative to having sex outside of marriage then his love is a shame..it is selfish and uncaring and not befit a man of the cloth. We all make mistakes in life..we all stumble and we all need someone who will love us unconditionally and unselfishly and this man ..and that ultimately is what he is (do not let the pastor suit fool you)...this man may not have the capacity to love you as you should be loved.
I think to start ask him to read 1st Corr. chapter 13 with you.
After that pray with him and then ask him about his views on repentance .... and what you two are now doing. But be strong and not blinded by your love. If he answers wrong do not pretend what is not there.. let it go.
good luck
Rrel
2007-01-24 13:48:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? I assume youre an adult since he is now the pastor and would need to be an adult for that.
Personally, I think that you cant be celibate forever. I understand waiting for sex when youre younger, but an adult is an adult.
Sex is a human need and if youre a responsible adult couple, its natural.
If its a bother to you, do you think you would be ok with maybe taking sex out of the relationship right now and doing other sexual things?
If its sex before marriage for you thats a problem, consider marriage.
2007-01-22 05:16:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know why people always think they are sinners if they share something beautiful and great together just because the bible said no.
Listen. The bible was never supposed to be taken literally.
Besides, you two are in love and are making love, not lust. You two are sharing a connection. It is not a bad thing, but a good thing that you two have come to realize about one another.
Love is important. Use it for the right things. He feels the same way about you do for him, so dont worry about if its wrong or right.
2007-01-22 05:15:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats a tough question well if hes a pastor that mean he has high stardards as a man and he really respect his man hood maybe u should enknowledge whats hes doing 4 his self and u saving his self 4 marriage is a big part of him but if u love enough and willing 2 wait then do so but u have 2understand pastors have morals and rules 2 live by so ull make it though
2007-01-22 05:17:10 · answer #5 · answered by tiffany f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you want to stop, you both need to ask God for help everyday. I know it is very tempting but the best way is to pray or ask a member of the church to help if it is not too embarassing or shameful for both of you to ask. Even if it is making love and not sex, it is still wrong, I'm not juding either I'm just letting you know what it says in the bible. but I hope both of you can work it out good luck! It will take alot of praying!
2007-01-22 05:16:56 · answer #6 · answered by justwondering 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, since you claim to be both Christians you know that you're not supposed to have sex before marriage, don't you? You could both stop this if you wanted to, but it seems you don't. Either keep your pants on and enjoy a platonic, celebate relationship, or make the relationship permanent.
2007-01-22 05:21:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok well if this is the case then do not put yourself in situations where you are alone together. It's what my wife and I did. We managed to not have sex before marriage.
As to sleeping together, God can forgive you both but you have to repent of it and try not to let it happen again until you tie the knot. If your both ready for sex then you must be ready for marriage so get hitched.
2007-01-22 05:14:06 · answer #8 · answered by kyrie_eleison_gr 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
God made us as sexual beings. It is man that put these restrictions on us. I don't see anything wrong with expressing your love to eachother as long as you are both committed to eachother and not doing it with anyone else.
If you don't agree with that - then I suggest you "take matters into your own hands" if you get my drift. I don't think the bible says anything about that.
2007-01-22 07:32:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just think about the Bible.
If you are a devoted Christian, you will confess your sins and not do it again.
And if you really cannot control yourself, at least get married if you guys love each other.
Just remember, God is ALWAYS watching you.
Good luck to you and your boyfriend.
~flashylights*
2007-01-22 05:13:23 · answer #10 · answered by S. 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I honestly don't know, sorry. I mean I could tell you to just always have someone around when you want to go out, but what if you want to talk about something personal. Pray. I commend you on trying.
2007-01-22 05:13:15 · answer #11 · answered by Love United 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋