Same people would be invited that were invited to the first 2. My sister threw away everything after both of her other 2 and now expects me to throw her another shower!
2007-01-22 04:28:09 · 19 answers · asked by CMARTIN 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
and she is having another girl, she already has 2 girls. I was thinking of having a bbq or something for our close friends and immediate family and those of of us who bought her little gifts can give them to her then.
2007-01-22 04:34:39 · update #1
I think this SO tacky. I could see if were a totally different group of people being invited but I don't think that people should be expected to attend or buy for more than 1 wedding or baby shower. PERIOD!
2007-01-22 04:36:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
As others have mentioned, formal ettiquette says only first babies gets baby showers. Another rule of formal etiquette is that showers (baby or wedding) should NEVER be thrown by immediate family members (siblings or parents of the person being honored); it is considered rude to say, "Come give my sibling/child gifts."
Aside from that, and an even bigger issue, is that it is rude of your sister to EXPECT anything of you. However, if you must indulge her...
Today's society does not pay much respect to traditional etiquette anymore. Therefore, something to consider is the mindset of the guestlist. Are they people that are going to find it tacky that this event is happening? If not, you have less to worry about.
A way around this is to just host a luncheon (or such) to simply celebrate an addition to the family. Do not use the term "baby shower". You could even go so far as to say, "No gifts, please." (Sounds like this might anger your sister, but it saves you face.) People will likely show up with a small something anyway. (Proper etiquette says to never show up empty-handed.)
2007-01-22 13:24:48 · answer #2 · answered by jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that 1 shower for the 1st child should be it. I have 2 kids and they are 10 years apart...one is a girl and 1 is a boy...so I did have 2 showers...but I had a whole new set of friends by then. She already has 2 girls so that should be it...no more freebies!
A family barbeque or dinner is a good suggestion though...and maybe the family can combine funds and get her 1 real nice gift or a gift card to help her start off....
2007-01-22 13:15:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I don't know much about baby shower etiquette, but every baby is special, so maybe instead of a shower you could have a congratulatory party. Invite people to go out to dinner in honor of the new baby. You can say in the invitation that gifts aren't required, some people might still bring gifts or send them if they can't come.
Hope this helps! and tell your sister congratulations!
2007-01-22 13:20:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Having a shower for her SCREAMS greed and is just NOT acceptable. Try a tea, bbq, or lunch at a local restraunt with close girl freinds. family, etc. Celebrate another life, of course, but full out "shower"?? uh uh...no. Put into the invitation that people can bring a package of diapers for the mom to be, and for each package of diapers that a guest brings, they will recieve a raffle ticket; raffle off small prizes to guests. Leave the games, gifts and little dresses out of the entire equation.
2007-01-22 13:05:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You didn't mention how far apart the babies are. I think that makes a difference. I should also say, that she shouldn't "expect" you to do anything. I am pregnant with my 2nd child, and have a girlfriend who is insisting on throwing me a shower (of course my first "baby" is now 9). I didn't ask for or expect it, but I do appreciate the gesture. The bottom line is, if you feel uncomfortable about it, you should tell your sister. Just be gentle, she is pregnant.
2007-01-22 12:45:45 · answer #6 · answered by gingerpatrone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not obligated to do anything you don't want to do. There is no reason she should have thrown away all of the baby things. So just don't do it and tell her why, that you're just not comfortable asking people for a THIRD gift, because she didn't bother to keep what they bough her before. If she wants another shower, let her throw it herself. It's not polite, but then again, neither is throwing away gifts.
2007-01-25 16:54:55 · answer #7 · answered by Vix 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thinks that although it might not be correct a baby shower should be a time to celebrate a happy moment in that persons life. She could have thrown things away because she didnt have space or didnt plan to have another child. Every child deserves a celebration. You should definetly plan a shower and if you think its rude let your sister know that the shower registry will only include small inexpensive items for her next baby.
2007-01-22 13:20:27 · answer #8 · answered by Lovely 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Women are allowed ONE baby shower. The only time subsequent showers are considered not rude/tacky is if the woman has a change of life baby. (i.e. She has two kids who are teenagers/in college, and suddenly she becomes pregnant unexpectedly.) By this time, all the baby clothes she had from her first two are probably old, stained, outdated, and any furniture, carseats, etc. she has left are no longer safe.
Maybe rules have changed, but this is the way I was raised and this is the way it was done "back in the day", lol. I'm old fashioned like that I guess. :)
2007-01-22 13:03:16 · answer #9 · answered by brevejunkie 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I mean its not "rude" but it seems to me that your sister should have saved some of her stuff from the other two girls. She thinks she's got it like that and that people will just buy her everything, NOT!!!! Tell her she has already had one to many baby showers. She is going to have to take responsiblity for this baby and go buy her own stuff.
2007-01-25 21:14:18 · answer #10 · answered by frigginhilarious 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋