i have split up from my bf after 3.5 years, we still love each other but he likes to go out all of the time and i am sick off him coming in slavering on or being in a bad mood setting up his lip giving cheek all of the time when we are happy we really are happy but i have given him chances to stop goin out and he never does im heartbroken because i really love him, but i am thinking if i take him back all of the time he will think this is the right way to treat me and it isnt, i no its sad askin relationship advice from here but need an opinion from some who does not know either of us . mwah x
2007-01-21 20:46:34 · 17 answers · asked by tulip 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you are not happy and you have spoke with him and he is not willing to change then you have to split up...you will fall in love with someone else who will treat you exactly the way you deserve to be treated....you may not think it now but you will and you will regret spending time with that loser.
2007-01-21 21:31:16 · answer #1 · answered by fajita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is gobby when he has had a few to drink, I can really sympathis with you. My husband is the same, thankfully he rarely drinks, so its not too much of an issue. If your fella is doing it a lot, I wouldnt put up with it.
You have to tell him what he is like when he gets like this. Demonstrate how awful he is if need be. Ask him to limit his going out, and see if that helps. Its not nice being on the receiving end of a drunk slobbering all over you, so he either needs to cut down his going out or you need to finish it.
Can you imagine putting up with this for the rest of your life?
What happens when you have kids? He cannot do this when you have a baby to look after, its irresponsible and dangerous, so this needs to stop before your relationship goes further down the line.
I hope he can see sense and give this lifestyle up, if not, I dont think the realtionship will last long term anyway.
2007-01-21 21:10:24 · answer #2 · answered by lozzielaws 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's not sad to ask about this. Lots of people ask really dumb questions and this isn't a dumb question at all! lol Anyway, you're right, if you keep taking him back, he'll just keep doing it. If he can basically get away with doing whatever he wants, he will because he knows you'll take him back. He's not respecting your wishes for him to stay home a bit and that's not an unreasonable demand. Look at it for what it is, him disrespecting you and not caring about how you feel. Unless he promises a complete overhaul of his ways and promises to not slip back into old ways, I'd say you should just move on and find someone who respects how you feel.
2007-01-21 20:54:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No! You have definately done the right thing as anything else just gives him the go ahead to continue behaving as he wishes. The only thing that makes some people change their behaviour is having to suffer the consequences. If he was unwilling to change for the sake of your relationship then he wasn't the guy for you. In time it will hurt less, in the meantime go out with friends and have some fun. You'll be surprised how quickly you think of him less often when you have other better things to think about.
2007-01-21 20:53:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you let him believe that it is ok for him to treat you like that, then you're right. He will continue to do so. The only way it would be able to work is if he were to make a change in himself. If it bothers you that he continues to act like that, you are only going to set yourself up for heartache. It will only lead to more pain in your life if you take him back. Work on being friends first and getting him some help...then see what develops. I know it isn't going to be easy, but it's probably the best way to go about things.
Good luck!
2007-01-21 20:52:11 · answer #5 · answered by Vanity Smurf 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well love you have done your best to make it work.If he cant see that move on and find someone who will treat you with respect.You deserve to be happy and have some one who will care for you.Should be give and take in every relationship but seems like its one sided for u.Take care and be happy.
2007-01-21 21:03:49 · answer #6 · answered by tobybites 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
e no`s u dont like it and e still does it, e aint gona change so eva get a bf that will respect ur wishes or put up wiv this crap for the rest ov ur life and b unhappy! i no wot i wld do.
get rid girl...u deserve beta!
2007-01-21 20:55:18 · answer #7 · answered by racey_tra_c 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
does he want you back and will he change? - would you put up with him if he doesn't change? - does he know how you feel? would he like it if you did the same? why don't you? write yourself a whole load of questions and answer them honestly then read through them - maybe this will point you in the right direction for you!
2007-01-21 20:53:02 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Kick him to the curb! You should be happy all of the time not just when it is convienent to him. If he truly cared about you he wouldn't go out all of the time.
2007-01-21 20:50:45 · answer #9 · answered by couchP56 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I say don't take him back,if he can't respect you than he's no good for you.Go find you someone who will treat you right and the way that you should be treated
2007-01-21 20:51:12 · answer #10 · answered by Veronica 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋