Why is it when?...?

Question

Okay... I have noticed something with guys... it seems like when you don't pay that much atteion to them or talk,call,text ,hangout with them... it makes them wanna talk,call,hangout,text you more... but if a girl starts talking to them, calling them,texting them,wanting 2 see them... then they back away again... they don't text,call, wanna see u as much or don't talk as much... why is that? please I really need 2 know... guys please answer thuis! thanks...

Thanks guys... he's not my bf or anything... we're friends... I like him and he says he likes me more than friends also... that's why I don't know what's up... I'm tired of guessing, I know all guys are not like this but almosy everyone is like this...

Answer 1

It's all about the challenge...Girls are the same way. They don't want a guy to be too needy either. Once a person matures, they kind of get out of that...That doesn't mean they have to be an adult though. I know some guys that are in their 30's and still like to play the game. But yes, you are right. So at least you have learned how to get a guy...Play his game until you are tired of playing games.
One day you will meet someone who isn't about playing games...Hopefully you will like him enough that you won't want to play them either.

Answer 2

Men love the chase! I tell my grown daughter and her friends this all of the time, and yet they don't get it. Don't be so available, and do whatever it takes to keep from picking up the phone and calling them!!! (that's hard). Always be busier than you really are.. bait them here and there, then back away. Eventually, the ones that really like you will hang in there, and you'll know it's meant to be. It works, I mean it. Just play their own game for a while. It's fun!

Answer 3

Could be a couple of things.

Could be 'thrill of the hunt' syndrome - some guys like the idea of pursuing a hard to get or hard to read gal.

Could be 'I'm too cool to care' syndrome - believeing all the clueless advice of other guys that responding to the overtures of a lady is showing 'weakness'.

Also, could be "I'd never belong to a club that would accept me as a member" syndrome, believing that they aren't worthy of the attention of a really desirable girl, so if a girl shows interest she must really be desperate to choose me.

That's just three possible ideas, and remember that every person is a unique individual. It's just too naive to generalize for all guys, just as it would be unfair to try and generalize about all ladies as this, that or the other thing.

Best to you.

Answer 4

Lizzy, when it is love it is different. I think you are meeting the wrong guys and unfortunately judging all of us by their standards.

Love doesn't play games with peoples heart. Any guy that shys away from his loving spouse or g/f has a problem and is probably only looking for punani and not love and commitment and serious stuff. He is a player!!

I will give anything to have my woman give me constant attention and I will reciprocate. After all that is what love is all about.
You see...wisdom says that love is giving...and that where you heart is that is where your focus will be.
If a man loves you he will like every bit of your attention and not shy away from it.
So, please do not think guys are like what you have experienced so far...there are many out there looking to have the kind of relationship where sharing total quality time with their partner means a world to them like you also feel.
Take your time and look you will find them.

Answer 5

The answer is really very simple. Guys like to have space. The guys that are all lovey dovey right off the bat, and are naggy are usually emotionally unstable. When it comes to the beginning of a relationship, we are aprehensive about going down the road that has lead to mostly the sam place every time. We are interested in a woman who challanges us, who is ellusive, and makes us work for their affection. Guys know plenty of slu ts, and finding a person who is as emotionally detatched from the rest of the world as we are piques our interest. Knowing how members of the opposite sex are going to react to you is impossible to do, unless you are a slu t. You have to understand that nagging is somehow built into our framework, and as soon as we see the signs of a needy woman, most of us run for the hills to find one who will not be on our backs all the time. just chill, and call or text every once in a while. Going out on dates, or hanging out requires work, and patience. Guys like to know that they are investing in something. Dont be naggy, and dont be whinny. If you intend to hang out with us to pursue a relationship, or you dig us, just say it. We respond to direct expressions of feeling, though we may not show them in an outward way.

Answer 6

If you show friendly interest in males, we feel a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment. This causes a diminishing returns effect. The more attention you give a male the less he values that attention. The best bet is to focus on your education and study your brains out on education. Become involved in sports and college or be college bound. Find your own spirituality and ignore the males. Once you have put all that equity into yourself, others will find you irresistible

Answer 7

I don't agree with the woman that said that "Men like the chase". As for myself, I HATE (yes, hate is a strong work for strong feelings) the head games that many women play.


As Sting sang "If you love them, set them free." If someone is too clingy you will cause him to pull away. The trick is to find the right level of attention. If you ignore him he could loose interest in you.

Good luck!

Answer 8

Well, guys certainly love a girl that will play into his ego by being agressive...

but on the other hand, we like to feel that we 'have what it takes' to get a girl that doesn't want to be gotten. We love to have the 'thrill of the chase' at the same time.

Answer 9

age old question- appealing to the egotistical hunter- no challenge in taking what lies in front of you- must be hard fought to be valued- so a guy shows more interest if he has to chase/thinks there is competition.
Even in shakespeare- there are examples of being coy/then leading a man on just enough.. yes IT IS like a game.. but then again.. men are often mentally/emotionally children..

Answer 10

Perhaps you are like my girlfriend whenever she wants money I get IM"d texted emails non stop but when she doesn't need money it is hard to even get her to do any of these things .So I tend to get annoyed when she needs money and disappointed by her when she doesn't .Crazy world hey.Have a nice day cheers. John.