Started dating this guy for a few weeks-he says early hes to focused on his future right now for anything TOO serious and wants to take things slow with anyone that he meets, meaning non-exclusive dating. Found out he is seeing another girl as me right now-do i have the right to be upset? Should I just walk away or play his game and date around also??
2007-01-21 13:48:47 · 17 answers · asked by MB2008 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well that depends on what u want n what u can handle.Do u want to be with someone who is also with someone else n does she know which means he's a cheater so even if he left for u how long before he would end up cheating on u.All around I personally would forget him.There r a billion more men on this earth go fishing n have some fun.Find someone who will respect u n will treat u the way u treat him.Bye 4 now n hope it works out.
2007-01-21 13:56:15 · answer #1 · answered by too4barbie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why should you be upset? he doesn't want to get serious with anyone right now and you should be thankful that he told you that....most guys would have been dishonest with you and would have played you...so what he's seeing another girl he has that right he's not in a serious relationship with you he's young and he wants to explore his options...and as far as you playing his game....what game is there to play he told you he wants to take things slow with anyone he meets so there for i don't think he's playing a game with you i think he's being upfront with you wich is a good thing...but if you want to walk away thats up to you...but if i were you i would date others and still keep him as a friend all b/c he was honest with you from the get go
2007-01-21 14:05:35 · answer #2 · answered by tanya m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he told you from the start that he is not wanting to take anything serious,then he was not playing a game. He was being truthful with you from the start as painful as that may be to hear. It does not mean that you are not a special woman, it simply means he chooses to not have a commitment in his life at this time. You can certainly have fun with him still but know not to get too attached and just enjoy the ride. Or if you think it will be too difficult to handle, then get out of it now before you get hurt and resentful.
2007-01-21 13:55:03 · answer #3 · answered by curious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A question for the ages- one with no right answer and yet there seems to be everyone with an opinion. Alas, I am no different.
As someone who has made a life out of these types of relationships perfecting the art of responding to the "what are we?" question with "i don't know but i really like the way it is- let's just see where this is headed", i find myself at odds with my own retort.
regardless...
playing "his game" is already excepting defeat because you are referring to it as "his game" . A very intriguing revenge plot might include- "i want us to be exclusive, and to show you how serious i am- i'm willing to have a threesome with (inserting hot girl you know) but we have to be exclusive after it or else this is over."
odds are he'll get excited and find himself at his own witts end- to which you can finally drop the bomb shell reply of "this just isn't gonna work" and peace out. the contingency for this revenge plot to work involves you willing to walk away, and if you truly do desire a monogamous relationship you must walk away beause what you have is a momentary objectification one with no happy ending in sight (no pun intended).
do you have the right to be upset? does a rainbow have the right to be beautiful? of course it does and of course you do. You are human and there is no way to necessarily justify your emotions- you are what you are, a rainbow is what it is.
Now, do you have the right to not be upset? Yes you do. In fact, you deserve nothing but the best (i know i do) and if a sexual relationship is bringing you nothing but resentment mixed with orgasms, you have not only the right, but the obligation to cut the chord and seek greener pastures.
***This goes for everyone: If a relationship brings you more headache/heartache than pleasure- do not waste your time "fixing it." The best way to fix it, is to end it. Easier said than done, but a universal truth all across the board.
2007-01-21 14:03:22 · answer #4 · answered by toburn41 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's not playing a game--he was straightforward with you when he said he wasn't going to be exclusive, and that he didn't want to be serious. Either you can go around and date others as well, or tell him you're not interested, and that you had something exclusive in mind. It's just dating.
2007-01-21 13:54:32 · answer #5 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like he's been honest with you by telling you that he's not interested in getting serious with you right now.
i dont see that he's playing games with you, but it doesnt sound like it would be wrong of you to date other people too.
dont do it to get under his skin though, he'll lose interest in you or worse, he'll play on the fact that you obviously want more of this r-ship than he does.
conversely if you really like him, then be patient and give him a good reason to want to commit to you.
i wouldnt sleep with someone who's sleeping with other people though .
even if it wasnt for your self esteem, you probably want a little time to go by and make sure he's not contracted std's or gotten anyone else pregnant.
i think ive broken the rubber about 25% of everytime i had sex with 1... whats worse is that i couldnt always tell right away when i used to drink.
2007-01-21 13:59:01 · answer #6 · answered by THEMENACE47 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you have the right to be upset. I believe you need to end it with this guy. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Meaning he wants you to be there whenever it's convenient for him . It's bullshit that he's seeing other girls. You aren't going to take this girl's sloppy seconds. This is disrespectful, he needs to respect you! I say walk away now! There are amazing guys out there looking for you!
You may think you can play his game as well, but believe me, you're going to be the one more hurt in this relationship!
Good luck!
2007-01-21 13:52:37 · answer #7 · answered by twinkle730 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not about playing a game...It is what it is...If you are looking for something serious...maybe you two should just stay friends. That way you wont have to feel upset everytime he's out doing is his thing
2007-01-21 13:53:31 · answer #8 · answered by All hail 2 the "Queen" 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girls you seem to alwyas want vengence and to get even two wrongs arent right. I was raised to believe women were soft and gentle and loveing blah blah but all I really see nowadays is selfish hoes who are all about them .. If that is the case I will stay single for life . I would love to give give give period .. The person I dont want thanks and praise I want spiritual bond and a deep love trust . Like a team Jordan - Pippin type
2007-01-21 13:53:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not playing a game. I know you feel jilted but he doesn't want to be serious with anybody. He's just dating. So if you have a problem with it then you should move on because you're not going to change his mind.
2007-01-21 13:52:49 · answer #10 · answered by Tasha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋