i love my boyfriend, he is the best thing that ever happened to me, but i tell him i want to break up with him and when he cries i smile..i dont know whats wrong with me..i love him so much but when i get depressed its like im a monster. ne one else feel this way?
2007-01-21 09:12:14 · 25 answers · asked by erica s 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Sounds like you have issues believing he wants to be with you. So in order to prove it to yourself you tell him you want to break up to see his reaction. When he cries you are happy because he has showed you that he cares.
Be careful one day your going to say you want to break up and he is going to agree with you.
2007-01-21 11:29:04 · answer #1 · answered by tomimegi 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
At first, when I was reading your question, I wasn't sure if you are depressed because of your boyfriend or with yourself, since you didn't give full detail as to why you are feeling this way. But if you are feeling so depressed that you feel like a "monster", I would consider getting help. Talk with a therapist, they can give you the help you need. You might want to give yourself some space from your relationship, though, if you feel being in a relationship is too much for you right now. If he truly loves you, he will understand and give you the time and space you need, and if he doesn't understand, you are better off without him. Just make sure you seek counseling. Good Luck!
2007-01-21 17:20:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I used to do this a lot with my boyfriend, when we would get into a fight I would say I wanted him to die or leave and never come back because I hated him so much, but after he would leave I would break down and cry and ask myself why I would say these things that I didn't mean, I know now that I was suffering from depression, I had an uncle that committed suicide when I was in high school and he was like a father to me, I was acting like this to my boyfriend I realized I was trying to push him away when we were getting too close because I was still hurt by my uncle taking his own life and did not want to get too close to someone else because I feared I would lose them also, luckily I started to open my heart to my now fiance and he was able to forgive me for all the horrible things I said, just remember when you are mad to breathe and don't say anything that you truly don't mean even if you are really mad.
2007-01-21 17:23:09 · answer #3 · answered by redroses_2003k 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
don't listen to some of these people on here their just mean and don't understand, i have the same problem and i am paying for it now not once but twice and 2 children later it's not ur fault but if u keep doing this u are going to lose him i was so mean to my ex i wanted to control him i told him i hated him, and we physically fought all the time and he isn't one to fight he is very sweet and caring well he was when i met him and now i have tainted him, but i always accused him of lying and cheating when i know he didn't i am just so insecure but finally i went off on him like never before cause i thought he was cheating and it was so bad that he found someone else someone 6 years younger and who i hear is pretty good to him well i know they get along, and i regret every day what i did to him, and i know he won't come back, i never thought he would leave me cause it was an every day thing but i guess he couldn't take it anymore, so u need to see a phsycologist right away, i have depression and anxiety and this is what causes me to act this way, hope i have been helpful, xoxo
2007-01-22 12:56:56 · answer #4 · answered by cc1872 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you feel like you have control over doing this, or does it "just happen?" Either way, I would seek help from a mental health professional. I think this is a dangerous pattern for you to be in. In the long run, you may end up isolating yourself from ones you love which will make your depression worse.
2007-01-21 17:54:04 · answer #5 · answered by Lady J 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hi this is dwassilie_07 I have a boyfriend and we are getting married. I have the same feeling that you have and all I can say is take it easy on the guy or else he'll turn to someone in deed.I like to make my man feel dumb, but making myself feel higher than him just hurts me cause I know that he has feelings . what would you do if he treats you like that? most women would dump them but if its true love you would stop what you are doing and open up to your man tell him what you really feel deep inside.
2007-01-21 17:25:12 · answer #6 · answered by denise w 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
NO!!! not to sound mean, but it sounds like you have issues! If you love someone then how can you get pleasure from there pain... I love my b/f and would never try to intentionally hurt him!Maybe you need to see a therapist... I mean you said it your self you turn into a monster...Obviously he loves you because he is still putting up with you! So if you truly love him you need to stop trying to hurt him!
2007-01-21 17:18:31 · answer #7 · answered by scoobynscrappydoooo 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yes i to get offside on my fiance, and i get real visiouse with him.
im very ignorent, arogent, bulgerent, decisive, defencive, violent, and just plain heartless towards him.
im mean with words and im good at reverse phycology, and at time can be very muniplutive to him.
i to make him cry and tell him to leave and that i dont want him anymore and that hes just a waste of brain space.
there are days when i just absolutly love him to bitz, then other days i would rather him dead
i dont mean any harm by it, i dont mean that at all, its just a feeling i get somedays.
i to am depressed and im dealing with the loss of my mother and hes been by my side through thick and thin.
i love him soooo much and i know that i need help dealing with my issuses, i hate putting him through this but i just get blanked and i just lose it on him when really its me im freaking out on. i dont trust myself when i spaze out, and to be honest when i see him cry i see my refection and i just cant help but smile cause its my own way of healing what i dont like to see.
good luck
2007-01-21 17:43:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you have a poor self-image...you feel that you don't deserve him...and it sounds like it is worse when you are depressed. What you are doing is sabotaging your relationship. You need to see a therapist to work out your self-image/self-esteem issues before you lose him for good.
2007-01-21 17:23:46 · answer #9 · answered by ruthbeckersc 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
We often lash out at the ones we love when we're dealing with our own issues. I don't think it's uncommon, but it's not healthy. Perhaps you need to talk to your MD about depression.
2007-01-21 17:16:11 · answer #10 · answered by Amanda D 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋