Why do so many people still practice the cruel method..?

Question

and selfish method of letting a baby "cry-it-out" ?
I consider it child abuse, ignorance and lazy parenting..

let me re-state the question,.. I mean infants.
in the newborn category time after time new mothers are told to let thier newborns cry-it-out by multiple people!
IT is shocking!

Amy A,.. thank you for your response,... touchy subject for you? Maybe you feel bad for letting your child cry.
I have done my reseach, that is why I think it is cruel. Have you read the article posted by "me"? I have and other to back it up stating the dangers and to add that it doesnt teach your child to self sooth, it teaches your child to give up.

As far as my child goes? I will teach her to be independant, and to know that she can count on me. My child is very lucky to have a mother like me, tough but fair.

Answer 1

I think it's cruel and harmful, especially after reading about this research. I've never let my son cry it out and he sleeps great, isn't spoiled at all!

Science Says: Excessive Crying Could Be Harmful to Babies
Science tells us that when babies cry alone and unattended, they experience panic and anxiety. Their bodies and brains are flooded with adrenaline and cortisol stress hormones. Science has also found that when developing brain tissue is exposed to these hormones for prolonged periods these nerves won’t form connections to other nerves and will degenerate. Is it therefore possible that infants who endure many nights or weeks of crying-it-out alone are actually suffering harmful neurologic effects that may have permanent implications on the development of sections of their brain? Here is how science answers this alarming question:

Chemical and hormonal imbalances in the brain
Research has shown that infants who are routinely separated from parents in a stressful way have abnormally high levels of the stress hormone cortisol, as well as lower growth hormone levels. These imbalances inhibit the development of nerve tissue in the brain, suppress growth, and depress the immune system. 5, 9, 11, 16

Researchers at Yale University and Harvard Medical School found that intense stress early in life can alter the brain’s neurotransmitter systems and cause structural and functional changes in regions of the brain similar to those seen in adults with depression. 17

One study showed infants who experienced persistent crying episodes were 10 times more likely to have ADHD as a child, along with poor school performance and antisocial behavior. The researchers concluded these findings may be due to the lack of responsive attitude of the parents toward their babies. 14.

Dr. Bruce Perry’s research at Baylor University may explain this finding. He found when chronic stress over-stimulates an infant’s brain stem (the part of the brain that controls adrenaline release), and the portions of the brain that thrive on physical and emotional input are neglected (such as when a baby is repeatedly left to cry alone), the child will grow up with an over-active adrenaline system. Such a child will display increased aggression, impulsivity, and violence later in life because the brainstem floods the body with adrenaline and other stress hormones at inappropriate and frequent times. 6

Dr. Allan Schore of the UCLA School of Medicine has demonstrated that the stress hormone cortisol (which floods the brain during intense crying and other stressful events) actually destroys nerve connections in critical portions of an infant’s developing brain. In addition, when the portions of the brain responsible for attachment and emotional control are not stimulated during infancy (as may occur when a baby is repeatedly neglected) these sections of the brain will not develop. The result – a violent, impulsive, emotionally unattached child. He concludes that the sensitivity and responsiveness of a parent stimulates and shapes the nerve connections in key sections of the brain responsible for attachment and emotional well-being. 7, 8

Decreased intellectual, emotional, and social development
Infant developmental specialist Dr. Michael Lewis presented research findings at an American Academy of Pediatrics meeting, concluding that “the single most important influence of a child’s intellectual development is the responsiveness of the mother to the cues of her baby.”

Researchers have found babies whose cries are usually ignored will not develop healthy intellectual and social skills. 19

Dr. Rao and colleagues at the National Institutes of Health showed that infants with prolonged crying (but not due to colic) in the first 3 months of life had an average IQ 9 points lower at 5 years of age. They also showed poor fine motor development. (2)

Researchers at Pennsylvania State and Arizona State Universities found that infants with excessive crying during the early months showed more difficulty controlling their emotions and became even fussier when parents tried to consol them at 10 months. 15

Other research has shown that these babies have a more annoying quality to their cry, are more clingy during the day, and take longer to become independent as children 1.

Harmful physiologic changes
Animal and human research has shown when separated from parents, infants and children show unstable temperatures, heart arrhythmias, and decreased REM sleep (the stage of sleep that promotes brain development). 10 12, 13

Dr. Brazy at Duke University and Ludington-Hoe and colleagues at Case Western University showed in 2 separate studies how prolonged crying in infants causes increased blood pressure in the brain, elevates stress hormones, obstructs blood from draining out of the brain, and decreases oxygenation to the brain. They concluded that caregivers should answer cries swiftly, consistently, and comprehensively. (3) and (4)

Answer 2

I think it's mean to let your baby cry for a long time, but 5 or 10 minutes is fine. It teaches your baby to self soothe and go to sleep on theri own. After the first day we implemented it in our home our daughter stopped night waking. You are supposed to wait until the baby is at least 6 months old though.

As far as calling the parents lazy or ignorant, all studies have shown it to be the most effective method. You may not agree with it, but these parents are just following what experts have said.

Answer 3

As of 2 weeks ago, I now have 7 grandchildren. Two of which I and my husband are raising. The youngest of the ones that we are raising was born premature. She was born at 32 weeks.

I also have a new grandson who is 16 days old. With both of these children, when we took them in for their first checkup, was told that their lungs are not getting as strong as they should be. The doctor told us with the new baby just this past Friday that "if he has been fed and his diaper is clean and dry and he is warm enough then don't get up and run to him as soon as he makes a sound. Let him cry for a little bit to strengthen his lungs." It is very hard for us to do but we let him cry for a few minutes every time he starts to fuss.

Answer 4

first of all, sometimes babies just cry. All of us get the "blues" sometimes. Maybe babies do as well. Sometimes we need a good cry. If there is nothing wrong I see letting the baby try to handle the situation. There are obvious limits to this. You don't do it for a prolonged amount of time. I am wondering how many children you have. I got my advice from a mother of seven who have all grown up to be healthy productive adults.

Answer 5

The cry it out method is not intended to leave children for a long time, only for about 5 minutes or so, and only after all needs have been met(i.e. food, diaper, warmth, etc.) It is not selfish because a parent is trying to let their child discover ways to comfort and resolve themselves. Not allowing children to explore and learn to deal with difficulties is what makes the selfish, whiny, super dependent adults that run around today. Parents cannot always stop life from happening to their children. They will fall. They will be frustrated. They have to learn to deal with it. When do you plan on allowing them to rely on themselves? At age 15? I pray for your and our sake that you don't have children and won't because you will have a child who can do nothing by themselves and will depend on you forever. Do your research about parenting methods before coming on here pretending like you have a clue what you are asking about. If you did you would see that it is a limited time thing. They are not supposed to cry for hours or be left wanting food.

Answer 6

Alls I can say is I can't do it, I go in pop dummy back in, ruffle covers just to let them know we are still home.

My 8 yr old sleeps brilliantly and has done for a long time, my 4 month old is getting there !!

Controlled crying is alot less heartbreaking than crying it out.

Answer 7

It is hard to judge someone else's parenting style when you do not live in their household BUT I also cannot see how parents can let their children "cry it out".

My child didn't cry it out and he isn't spoiled either. He is growing up very content because he doesn't need to wonder if I will be there. He knows that if he NEEDS me that I will help him. That doesn't mean I am there at his every demand of course.

Answer 8

depends on how old the child is. it is not child abuse as you are not abusing the child in any way. it is not ignorant as the parent knows what is best for them. it is their child not yours. and it's not lazy! some kids just cry because they know that they are going to get attention.

Answer 9

I agree. However, I think that if the baby is constantly crying, you may consider trying to let it cry for say, 5 minutes before tending to it.

But I do think it's bad. They're crying for a reason, people!

Answer 10

first of all do you have children if there not wet sick hungry and you are trying to sooth them. what else do you advise mothers to do since you think it child abuse as long as the baby it's crying for days gosh.

Answer 11

How is it ignorance? I think it would be worse for a parent to spoil her baby. A baby has got to learn how to self-soothe, otherwise you'll be in her bedroom until she's 5 years old, trying to get her to put herself to sleep.