Am I depressed or could it be something else?

Question

I've been feeling suicidal for a while now. I feel better days later as all normal people would like a normal person would. But this has been going on for years now. I thought I would outgrow it as I am 21 now. I know I am still young so I try to shrug it off. I thought it was the big holidays or the darkness but I get much sunlight and I was the happiest man alive in for about two weeks in December and January.

I've been keeping a journal of each time I think about killing myself. In the last week its been twice. The last 4 weeks its been five times.
I was happiest most before moving back to my school's campus. Now that college has started again it feels like everything is hopeless, ect.

I am not too concerned about my problems but I am extremely worried that I'll kill myself when I am feeling down. Am I depressed or is it just in my head or something else? Thank you for reading and answering my question. I went to great lengths to post this anonymously.

Answer 1

I'm no doctor, mind you - but I've been struggling with bipolar disorder for years (manic-depression).

It sounds like you are STRESSED, first off - school can be overwhelming. Depression also fits the criteria.

Please, PLEASE take this information to someone who can help. Campus Health Advisor, Counselor, SOMEONE. You don't have to do this alone.

Depression is nothing more than a chemical "misfire" in the brain, and is an EASY fix. You DON'T have to suffer or be scared of yourself. Okay?

Feel free to contact me if you'd like. I care. :)

Answer 2

You should speak to a school counselor, and get to a doctor. Depression can kill, and you are feeling that now.

You were fine over the holidays when you were home-- but the bad feelings came back at school. Is school very stressful for you--are you under extreme pressure there? This would be a good time to start letting people (parents, counselor, etc) know about that.

You are doing a good thing by keeping the journal--please continue doing that--not only on bad days, but on good ones too. Writing can help--be therapeutic.

Suicidal thoughts are almost always due to depression--you need to see a professional as soon as possible. Life is too short to start with, without ending one even sooner than necessary.

I wish you a long, healthy life.

Answer 3

You have probably been suffering from depression, or more likely bipolar disorder. Bipolar disorder is a serious illness that is characterized by periods of depression and mania, extreme highs. Thoughts of suicide is a common symptom of the depression state of bipolar disorder. Other symptoms include feeling hopeless, worthless, etc., problems concentrating or making decisions, and loss of interest in things that you normally enjoyed. Symptoms of the mania state include an increased energy level, more self-confident than usual, easily distracted, and doing risky and unusual activities to the extreme.

Bipolar disorder usually begins in teenagers and young adults. Mood swings can be triggered by events and emotions in your life, such as going back to school, holidays, seasonal changes, etc. It is good that you've determined that college is a trigger for you and it is recommended that you record your emotions, which you're already doing.

Bipolar disorder is a very serious and dangerous disorder. It is very important that you get medical attention. Without the appropriate treatment, the disorder could become harder to treat. Treatment will help you live a more normal life. Treatment for bipolar disorder includes medication, therapy, and self-care, which includes tracking your moods and symptoms, learn about the disorder, and talk to a health-care provider.

Remember that you are not alone. About two and a half million adults in the United States are affected by bipolar disorder. There is always someone you can talk to, friends, family, support groups, doctors, ministers, etc. There is never a good reason for someone to take their own life and I'm so happy that you realize that their is something wrong and want to take the necessary steps to get help. I'll pray for you and if you ever need anything or someone to talk to, I'm here for you.

“Fear not for I am with you, don’t be dismayed for I am your God, I will help you and make you strong and uphold you with my victorious Right Hand.” Isaiah 41:10

Answer 4

Hi. I think you may have depression. Sometimes people are depressed because of clear reasons and other times there doesn't seem to be any reason. My advise is to go to a psychiatrist or psychologist just to talk about how you feel. Having suicidal thoughts requires help immediately. You must seek help immediately. Depression is not something people grow out of and is not part of a developmental process.
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I also agree with Harley about seeing a Campus Health Advisor or Counselor. If this doesn't help then leave your school campus.

Answer 5

Hi. I am very worried for you, not to be harsh or anything, but I'm going to be very straight forward: I hope you are seeing a psychiatrist or counselor because I feel like you need help. I have had those emotions before, but luckily I have people in my life that make me feel better and realize that I do want to live to enjoy what life has to offer. You need to pull through these emothions, but I can see by you posting this personal information online is you reaching out for reassurance that your are feeling depressed. Please find something that makes you happy, whether its family, friends, a hobby, etc. You should enroll in some school activities or clubs to keep yourself occupied. Life is beautiful, but it's less beautiful when people are depressed. You need to take one day at a time, be hopeful, and optimistic. But seriously, please inform someone if you haven't done so.

May God Bless You, and good luck in college :)

Answer 6

Contact me as I've just started a group for teens to talk in a safe place where there will be no judgement or anything of that nature. Just a helpful person wanted to help others whom seem to be down and out.

Plus I've been in the psch. system since I was 20 now that I'm in my mid forties (47) it's still not quite a bed of roses, but I still feel hopeful that someday I'll be alright it hasn't been easy, but we all need someone to talk to, no matter where we are in our life.

So, feel free to contact me as I know what your stresses are like as I've been there far too many times. I've had my share being bullied and picked just because, I thought and acted differently than the other students and teenagers.

Answer 7

sorry to know you are hurting like that ,,you really need to get some proffessional care from your Doctor.there are many things that can be helpful and life changing for you,but you must be willing to get that help ..good luckk