I've been seeing this girl for 6 months, and found out recently she is pregnant. Up to this point we hadn't discussed marriage and we don't even live together. We have feelings for each other, but it's still fairly early in the relationship. I'm scared of us having it, then finding out we're not right together. Should we have it? I'd like many opinions and points of view so I make sure I think about this from every angle and know what I'm doing before we decide what to do.
2007-01-21 04:40:41 · 18 answers · asked by 187345 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
By the way, she was on the pill when she got pregnant, not that that matters now.
2007-01-21 05:19:39 · update #1
i dont think you should rush into marriage just because the two of you are pregnant. i think you should be a caring and supportive dad. you are a dad now whether you wanted to be or not. everyone is scared of having kids....even those that plan it out... this is just your circumstances.....live them out to your best. be supportive to her emotionally and financially and be there when the baby comes and after...if that turns into a relationship you both really care about...then get married or dont....
2007-01-27 06:59:22 · answer #1 · answered by outofmymind 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have the baby and find out you are not right together would it really be that bad. Having a baby is a big step but also wonderful. You can both love and care for your child weather you stay together or not. I don't think you should get rid of your baby because you are worried you might not stay together. You don't need to get married just take your realationship slow and if it works out great, you have a family if the realationship does not work you can still be good parents for your child. Do you have a supportive family that could help you prepare for having a child? if you don't i'm sure your doctor might be able to put you in touch with some help. There are some very helpful pregnancy and parenting books around too. If you do keep your baby try to be there for your girlfriend through the pregnancy it can be scary not knowing what to expect i guess not only for her but also for you. Don't let worries about your realationship decide what happens to your baby you and your girlfriend need to decide that. Having a baby might be a big step but it might be the best step you take. hope this helps.
2007-01-21 20:28:43 · answer #2 · answered by bulldogfish 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The two of you are the only ones who can truthfully answer that question. I can tell you my experience for whatever its worth.
When I got pregnant for my second child I had met the guy only 3 months before. Well she is 7 now and We had two more after that. We are still together after 8 years. We aren't married, to us its irrelevant at this point. But that's our decision. I am definitely not against marriage. It is really what is right for the couple and the circumstances. I do believe that both parents should be involved with the child if at all possible, whether they get married, live together or apart.
2007-01-24 02:09:56 · answer #3 · answered by dreamer12324 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me if you feel like you are no going to be a good parent to this baby then by all means don't do it I was 18 yrs old when I had my first child and til this day I think about what if I would not have had this baby my life would have been totally different now i'm a single parent of three, not married, not working due to a injury,it's hard out here for a single parent so if you two talk about it and feel good about talking about all and everything that has to do with a child and can handle that and share the problems that come along with a baby by all means have it .But if you see that you are not having the greatest time and their are alot of hardships with you and your girl by all means Please don't bring another baby in this f-ed up world cause it is hard believe me it's hard.Good Luck
2007-01-28 13:34:58 · answer #4 · answered by otess a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have the baby. If it is not meant for you two be together then that is something you will have to deal with later the baby should come first. Even though she was on the pill we all know pregnancy is still a risk. The baby deserves a chance regardless. It just means you both need to step up to the plate and take care of your responsibility it is not the end of the world it is a beginning of a new life. God bless you both and i will keep you in my prayers!!!
2007-01-25 03:24:00 · answer #5 · answered by trung_camry30_9x 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I myself, I don't feel abortion should be a form of contraception. You were adult enough to do the do, be adult enough to take responsibility for your actions, even if you have to consider adoption. There are many great people that would love to have childrn, but cant, it's not fair to end the childs life, just because things aren't picture perfect. My boyfriend and I got into the same fix two years ago. My daughter has changed my life, and I never once regretted my decision to keep her. I have a friend that had an abortion and now she's left wondering who, what, and where that baby could have been 2day.
2007-01-21 13:20:40 · answer #6 · answered by Kottonfire7 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mother found out she was pregnant with me after her and my biological father broke up. She told him and he was not interested in having a baby. It was in the 70's and single mothers were not the common thing they are today. She says she never even thought twice about whether to have me or not. If she had gotten an abortion, I would not be here today.
When I found out I was pregnant with my son, my conditions were less than favorable, but I had him anyway. If I had gotten an abortion, he would not be here today and he is my heart.
It is hard to decide what to do because it is such a big decision. You have to decide together. And remember, God has a plan for everyone- your unborn child included. And he never gives us more than we can handle.
2007-01-21 13:16:10 · answer #7 · answered by Rairia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i hadn't been with my boyfriend very long when i got pregnant with our first child. we were only 17 on top of that. but we decided to have the baby anyway and we kept her. we didn't know if it would be a mistake or not but we decided it together. in the end i'm glad we did. the guy and i are still together and our daughter is growing up fast and she is gorgeous. and we also have another child due on may 20th. in my eyes children are a gift from god. whether or not you keep the child is all up to ya'll, but i believe abortion is wrong so please try to avoid that option. if you don't want to keep it, then give it up for adoption. there are many families that want children who can't have them.
2007-01-21 14:33:54 · answer #8 · answered by camsweets1718 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well for one thing even the pill is not a for sure thing. For two it's not up to you it's up to her and her only because it's her body. I am not trying to be rude here just face the facts. Last but not least if you and her don't want the baby I think adoption would be the best bet, don't take it out on the baby because you weren't ready to have one.
2007-01-21 13:29:53 · answer #9 · answered by Jen n CraigB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really only you can answer that. I know that's not what you want to hear, you'd like to hear someone give you an answer- but this is a decision that only you and your gf can make together. Everyones lives and beliefs are different, and you have your own. Weigh all of the pro's and con's, and think about the future, and whether or not you can live with yourself if you give it up.
2007-01-21 12:54:25 · answer #10 · answered by Peach Tree 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋