I'm curious about this because my friend is always fighting with her man, and he hits her so she hits him back, but dosent this just make things worse? we all know men should never put their hands on a woman, i know he is wrong to hit her, but was she wrong to hit him back? the thing is they seem to think this life style of all hell breaking loose is normal, she comes to me when troubles happen, i have told her over and over again to get out, but she's still there, and the complaints are getting old real fast....should i just ignore her from now on? because she won't listen?
2007-01-21 04:28:29 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When you are hit by someone it is difficult not to hit them back. But it is an automatic response which is a learned response and thus can be unlearned. It is no use taking her to a therapist unless she wants to see one and why would she see one while you are there? You believe that you are helping her by being there for her as any good friend would. But after a while she has learned to come to you when she is in trouble. However you too have a life and although you mean well by helping her, she will not be able to sort it while you're her "dumping ground" as someone said. Be her friend and take her to someone who can help her. Help her see the sense of going to get counselling then she will want to go and receive the help she needs. She will not leave as some people think "better the devil you know". Do not ignore her but assist her in seeking help. I have known people who believe that a bad relationship is better than no relationship. If there are any children involved, they will learn this behaviour and so the cycle will continue. Maybe as well as professional help you can gt her a place to move into, although this may be a reason for her partner to dislike you. Often women will subconsciously seek out a violent partner if their father has been violent. Not that this is always the case. Good luck to you both and keep smiling whatever.
2007-01-21 07:20:30 · answer #1 · answered by d1ckdeckard 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I have a friend who was in the same situation wit a guy like 3x her size, I was scared he was going to pick her up and snap her in 2 one off night... Basically the best thing for her was to have me there for her, sometimes ppl who take abuse are those who are really needy, I offered my heart and my home and all of my time if she were to need it. But I think u 2 should think about going out together often... take out a lot of time for girls nites and remind her to keep her eyes out for more submissive men. Maybe don't ignore her but you could threaten your relationship with her by saying you care so much for her and it kills u that she is treating herself like a tool or whatever u really feel just be honest with her and I am sure she will come around and do the right thing.
2007-01-21 04:36:49 · answer #2 · answered by Ms. Floats_Ur_Boat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you may properly be in massive hardship right here. If he's conscious the position to locate you, you're a sitting duck. you want to take your dogs and get far remote from this guy. contact family members, cousins, someone and get going. do not go away any lines of your whereabouts otherwise he would music you down. Get into medical care so that you under no circumstances get entangled with alcoholics with personality themes back. no count number how rational you sound once you end it with him, he will listen it in yet otherwise. I repeat: you're in threat. Your undesirable determination would finally end up costing you your protection or your existence. it is an OJ interior the making. you want to flow out interior the midst of the nighttime and do not look lower back. i do not imagine a restraining order would keep a guy like this away. If he's hell bent on getting you, he will.
2016-10-15 21:33:53 · answer #3 · answered by cohan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your her dumping ground or toilet if you may for her emotional garbage. Tell her to take to her therapist next time. Don't play your part in her game of drama.
DStarr
2007-01-21 04:31:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it came down to going to jail, they both would go. So I guess it was wrong for both of them.
2007-01-21 04:31:55 · answer #5 · answered by Tasha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋