My long-distance boyfriend of 3 years told me last night that he's fed up to come home always to an empty flat alone and that he was wishing I was there. I thought it's sweet and told him that I miss him too,that it'd be nice if we could organise a meeting. We see each other about once a month. This morning he sent me a text that he didn't say it to be sweet and that he's fed up of having a girlfriend who's far and that it's been too long like this and he doesnt want to continue like this. I told him that I understand him but what does he want to do? He said we really need to think about it and he said not to expect always a solution from him, I also need to do something. He was looking for a job near me but could not find one. I started to be scared and asked him if he wants to end it. He got upset and told me that I always take everything as a threat instead of trying to find a solution with him and that he doesn't like that. He said to stop worry like that. We'll talk tonight.
2007-01-21 04:27:28 · 7 answers · asked by violet b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He feels scared .... He must be just Internet guy... Out of reality... Living in his own world... Do not mind and do not take as it it is about you...
2007-01-21 04:41:53 · answer #1 · answered by simplegirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, he's not trying to leave you. He's trying to get closer to you. When it comes to relationship problems, men solve, not ponder them. He wants you to help him solve this problem of being too far apart. Make some calls. Do something. Assure him that even if you both can't see how you can work out right now that if you're meant to be you will be. Assure him you are not making or taking threats in this relationship. You just need a little assurance he's not going to leave you over this. It sounds like you're very lucky to have a guy that stays in a relationship like this for so long. But I think three years would wear anyone down. I did this once for one year and about went out of my mind. What needs to happen is one of you either needs to move closer or one of you (probably you) needs to set a date when that will happen so he has some encouragement that this long distance stuff will end one day. Good luck!
2007-01-21 04:36:49 · answer #2 · answered by jewels 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he wants to remain together but not the way things are. He sounds like he feels like he has made all the efforts and done the thinking as far as staying in touch goes. He wants you to do some of it, too. Do you have suggestions other than breaking up? Seems like there's alot that can be done on both accounts to help ease the strain of distance. How far apart you are determines if going to see each other weekly, taking turns, is possible. You can video yourself and send it on your phone if you both have cells. Constant reminders in the mail are always a welcome sight. Do you send cards and letters? And unfortunately, sometimes, it's just too difficult to remain close and it's more work than it's worth. You need to decide if that's the case. Just don't always take the easy road and suggest he wants to end it. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going! You've got your work cut out for you. Get busy, baby!
2007-01-21 04:36:34 · answer #3 · answered by enjoyrselves 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, babe. Calm DOWN. He isn't trying to leave you. He is frustrated. He is venting and wants a solution. He can be tired and still love and stay with you. Keep working on a solution and know that you'll have bad days (like yesterday) and good ones. He loves you. Don't take negativity and conflict to be fatalistic. I do that too sometimes and so does my husband, but I am thankful that I am quickly reminded to get my feet right back on the ground. Look for a solution and be patient. Hear him out insted of speaking from fear all the time, which is what he sees you doing. Best wishes to you. Hang on to your love.
2007-01-21 04:33:01 · answer #4 · answered by Sleek 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he is trying to leave you. He sounds frustrated because he can't be with you. Be patient with him and talk. It sounds like he wants the BOTH of you to talk and try and come up with a solution so the 2 of you can be together. Good Luck
2007-01-21 04:34:43 · answer #5 · answered by Lace 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me that he wants you to try and find a way to move to him... I hate distance relationships they are so hard, and fustrating. I know I had to do one for two years and then I moved to him, I just couldn't take it any longer, we have been together for four years now. I don't think he is going to leave you. I think he just wants to be with you more than once a month.
2007-01-21 04:37:40 · answer #6 · answered by jellojiggler03 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he wants to be with you.
If he has put forth an obvious effort to relocate and find employment near you.....then you're the one he wants.
However,.......are you willing to relocate for him ???
That is now your issue. It's so far he has put forth all the effort.
What you done for him ,Lately ??
2007-01-21 04:44:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋