A serious Mental Health Question.?

Question

I was brought up in a place where violence was an everyday thing (or pretty much everyday). My mother was beaten constantly. I was (at the time) too young to do anything about it. Now I just seem to have this deep rooted rage. I am able to control it for the most part. But sometimes I can get pretty MEAN!! (an understatement) I don't beat people up or nothing like that. But I think about it alot. I was also abused in everyway (no need for details) I absolutely hate people who abuse children. I tend to avoid people because I'm scared of myself. I have been told by many that I have a good heart (cause I love animals and innocent people) But I am so sensetive. TOO sensetive! I want help. But I'm on unemployment right now. I took a big pay cut because of that. I don't know how to get started. All I want is to be told those 3 words by someone. But I can't keep a relationship. Theres just no way. I've been told that I'm extremely attractive. But my emotional problems keep me suppressed.

Answer 1

There are resources for people with low income or no income. Find a local university with a Psych Department and see if they have a student clinic.

I live in Chicago and at UIC the Psych Dept only charged me $10 per visit. It really helped me through my serious depression. No meds, just talking and exercises for me to practice.

I was disabled in an accident and unable to work for a couple of years. No disability insurance and no income as a result. Try it out.

It sounds like you will need a lot of therapy for a long time. Hang in there. You can make it through. You seem like an intelligent person with a good heart.

It's not your fault, what happened to you, but only you can change how you act as a result of it. Life will get better if you want it to.

Answer 2

I think that your anger and rage are probably deeply rooted in your emotions because of your past. You mentioned that you were too young to help your mother... maybe you feel guilty for not being able to fight back... I don't think you should feel guilty for what happened... after all, you were not the abuser. But it's absolutely normal to think about that constantly and even be angry about it. I was abused at 14 by a family member and it took me 4 years just to be able to even talk to a male. Not because I was scared, but because I was angry and felt like beating them all up. It's like when something happens and you keep playing in your mind later and how you would have liked it to turn out instead. I too am VERY sensitive and it just takes time to find that someone who will not only love you but is willing to help you heal and continue to live life positively. But, you shouldn't rush to find love because then you might find that you are only trying ot fill a void... Believe me... it's not fun for both people. Sooo, seriously, go to a community health center, most are free and are willing to give you references of places and people who can help you or just hear you out. Most of the time it jsut feels good to talk and vent. Good luck and don't wait!!! The sooner you help your emotions and problems, the healthier and happier you will be. It will be motivating believe me!!! Once you rid yourself of the pain and anger your and your mother have gone through, you can move on and get back on the professional and sentimental scene. So, again good luck and best wishes!!!

Answer 3

There r community health centers and local hot lines u can call for help, they offer free counseling services to those that can not pay or they will help u get the help u need from other services in ur area. Look under Human Services in ur phone book. It is good that u realize u have a problem and I admire u for trying to overcome them. U just need someone to talk out ur problems with, that has the knowledge to give u positive feedback. Start looking and Good luck for a brighter future. U deserve it.

Answer 4

Since you are on unemployment, you should consider trying to apply for medicaid health insurance then maybe go see a therapist for some anger management. What you are experiencing is pretty normal, but it isnt healthy.

You should try to form healthy relationships with others, but first you need to form a healthy relationship with yourself. Accept that what happened to your mother and to yourself was not your fault, then begin to think of how to piece together your life. If that means making new friends then join a club or a gym to meet new people.

Answer 5

ANGER IS A SECONDARY EMOTION. IT USUALLY STEMS FROM SOME FORM OF DEPRESSION OR WHAT NOT. TRY ADDRESSING SOME OF THE LIFE EXPERIENCES YOU HAVE HAD ON A DEEPER LEVEL. PERHAPS THERE IS SOMETHING YOU STILL NEED TO ADDRESS. ANOTHER THING THAT IS VERY IMPORTANT(AND ALSO THE MOST DIFFICULT) IS FORGIVENESS. I HAD A VERY HARD TIME WITH THAT ONE. HOWEVER, ONCE I LEARNED TO FORGIVE AND ACCEPT THAT IT WAS NOT MY FAULT, I WAS ABLE TO START HEALING. I WISH I COULD TELL YOU IT IS AN EASY PROCESS, BUT I CAN'T. IT IS HOWEVER WORTH IT! YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND SHOULD NEVER HAVE TO FEEL THAT YOU ARE. GOOD LUCK TO YOU.

Answer 6

well i will be here to talk to [e-mail].
try metanoia.org, asktheinternet
therapist.com. 4 therapy. call
1800 273 talk to help u out. also do not let the past define you. you are special regardless. i was suicidal once and now i realize life can get better with each day. we need patience. try holisticonline.com, beliefnet.com. to help u out. you will get better. trust me.

Answer 7

hey.
I LOVE YOU.
you seem sweet and nice and one day you will find that lucky ladey out there.
just sit back and let god take care.
god bless

Answer 8

You should become Batman.