Would you be angry at a daycare provider IF they spanked YOUR child?

Question

IF it would P*SS you OFF if your daycare provider did it to YOUR CHILD.....THAT is YOUR clue IT is WRONG.

Whether it be spanking, slapping or biting back... If YOU would SUE the provider WHY should YOU be allowed to hit your own child.

The points I am TrYiNg to make in my TWO questions are that physical attempts to stop misbehaviour are detrimental to a childs moral, a hit is a hit.... If it is NOT okay for others to hit your child but it IS okay for you to do it... then it sounds like only YOU are allowed to do it because the child is "YOURS". That is NOT thinking of the wellbeing of the child. It is thinking selfishly. From the CHILDS perspective~ YOU are supposed to be their protector that wishes to SAVE them from grief or pain. Yet you choose to cause the pain~
My other question asks why it is OKAY to spank a child that does not know any better, but NOT okay to hit your SPOUSE (c:

Answer 1

There is no difference between you and someone else hitting a child. Hitting is hitting. If we tell a child "you do something wrong, you will get a spanking", they learn to expect this. If at school, the teachers can't hit, how do we expect them to punish a child that only responds to hitting. Which, is exactly the problem with hitting and why we should never do it! Use punishments that can be applied by any adult in any situation.....

Answer 2

i own a home child care.NEVER EVER do we do any kind of copral punishment, shame the child, or scream at a child. I was "patted" as a kid, but never hard, but as a daycare provider that is neither by job or my place. As for biting. well we had a child who at the age of two who would bite when he was mad. We told the parents and they wanted us to bite him back. I was shocked. I told the child " we do not bite. biting hurts. please use your words" I tell you it works. yesterday we had a child who was kicking her feet under the table and the 3 year old who was being kicked said " i do not like it when you kick me, please stop" and the child kicking did stop. some said this in an answer " People who 99.9% of the time don't have this unconditional loving bond with the children are"

Day care providers
Teachers/principals
Step Parents
Baby Sitters (depending on who is the baby sitter)

While you may have a point, i love each one of those kids as if they where my own. We are like a family. We have family outings with my-self and the daycare parents and kids. We talk about what is going on with the kids on a reg basis, i have kept some of the kids with me if the parents had to go away due to a family thing. These kids tell me that they love me on a daily basis and even some of the parents do that. I think i have one of the best jobs in the world. which is to help shape the lives of these kids. When the kids leave due to going to school, i cry because i have had most of these kids since they where 8 weeks old.

Answer 3

If I give my child a smack (rare but it has happened) I know the strength of it (not too hard) and that all resources would have been used first. How do I know what it was for, was it deserved, how hard was it, and was there other options? A smack is never done light heartedly in my house. How do I know that the child care provider thought through the consequence of her actions In Australia we don't use the term spanking. Is is one smack or many? If it is many then no parent or anyone else has the right

Answer 4

I think you are comparing apples and oranges. Let me say that I do NOT condone spanking and I don't spank my own child, but there is a HUGE difference between a parent spanking their child and a teacher doing it. First off the teacher has no way of knowing whether it is accepted in the home of the child. Second, A parent has the right to discipline theirchild as they see fit as long as it is not abusive in nature. While I do not agree with spanking as I said, Spanking is not child abuse. While it is unnecessary and in my opinion ineffective and counter productive, there is a big difference between a smack on the rump and beating a child to the point of needing medical attention. It is the parents decision as to how they want their child disciplined, and it also up to the parents as to who provides the discipline and how other people in charge of their children administer it. To me it would be no different than Jane Doe in the grocery store spanking my child. That is just too intimate an issue for people to involve themselves in. You are damn right I would sue anyone spnked my child. That would be overstepping their bounds, and it is not their place to do so. But should a child be taken into foster care because their parents choose to spank? As long as it done carefully and reasonably , NO! The foster system would be catostrophic and you would have a lot of parentless kids out there. I am sorry but while I see your point, and I agree with your stance on spanking, your opinion is way too extreme and unreasonable. You are way off base on this one. Sorry

Answer 5

I have two children, eleven and eight and I don't spank them because I believe in non-violence and I was never spanked as a child either. But sometimes I would like to give them a good a** whooping because they can be very disrespectful. I can see why some people do spank their kids. If a small child keeps touching an electric socket and you slap their hand and tell them NO, it usually works much quicker then just constantly telling them NO. Your question is not really a fair one because no day care provider should be putting their hands on your children. It is the parent's decision on how they want to discipline their children and as long as they are not beating their children, why do you care.

Answer 6

I would be very pissed if anyone laid a hand on my child without my permission. My mom had my kids recently and I told her "If he's is bad, put him in the corner, but if he's out of control you can swat his rear" but its not like she would have to since my kids are good for everyone else!
I have been the childcare provider in my home and had 2 different parents TELL ME to spank their out-of-control child (no the behavior was not due to my care, it was ongoing from home). But its not my child, so I never did.

Bottom line, in my opinion anyone who lays a hand on my child without my permission is asking for a lawsuit. I know in some states its still legal to spank a child in school! If I lived in one of those states I would homeschool, period.

My children are MINE (not in the possesive sense, but I did give birth to them) and I decide who touches them be it a hug, spank, or anything else. On that same note I would be equally pissed if the neighbor hit my dog.

I know if I choose to spank I am not exerting enough force to physically harm my child, I cannot be sure that another adult has the same restraint.

And yes I would sue, and why should I be allowed to spank my own child? Because it is my child to discipline as I see fit as long as that discipline is not abusive. I know if and when I spank that it is only hard enough to get attention, not to leave marks or cause injury. How can i be sure that the DCP is not hitting hard enough to break bones? I can't. Therefor no one touches my child.

This is my opinion, Everyone parents differently and as long as the child issafe, well cared for and not abuse none of us as the right to judge another for their parenting methods.

Answer 7

Depends on prior agreement. I would only grant someone approval to spank my girls if they shared a unconditional love for them. That they would be doing so for the betterment of the child, and not so to relieve stress, or that they are angry with them. Spanking is not a stress reliever in our home, it's a consequence for unacceptable behavior.

People who 99.9% of the time don't have this unconditional loving bond with the children are

Day care providers
Teachers/principals
Step Parents
Baby Sitters (depending on who is the baby sitter)

People who COULD but not always have that bond:

Grand Parents
Uncles/Aunts
God Parents

Answer 8

Yes, I would be angry. A scolding would be OK and giving my child some other kind of punishment like not being able to play with the toys for 5 to 10 minutes would be fine. But the parents should be the only one to give a child a slap on the butt for misbehaving.
We could learn a lot about parenting from the animal world.

Answer 9

You cannot compare some daycare provider with a mother/father on spanking a child. No matter how bad it may seem, that is the parents choice. The parents deal with different situations in their own way.

Answer 10

If my child deserved it I wouldn't mind at all. Some things children do merit spankings, not beatings. I was a victim of physical abuse as a child and I also received spankings for the things I did wrong. I knew the difference and I also knew when my dad was in the wrong.

It really isn't anyones bussiness though, whether I or anyone else for that matter feels their child desreves a spanking from time to time.