What is the best way to start over after going through a devastating addiction?

Question

I just want to know if anyone can give me some ideas as to how they started their life over. I am 22 and I had a very devastating problem called bulimia for 5 years. I dropped out of two universities, got pregnant twice, went to jail, failed two treatment programs, almost died of alcohol poisioning, put my family through hell and wasted great amounts of money. All of those things were totally out of character. In high school I was such a conscientous perfectionist. Now I'm back in school and feel lost, scared, lonely, and discouraged because I know that I have to change everything about myself and learn to think in a whole different way about life and about who I am. I now feel that I finally have the strength to change but I am very overwhelmed and I worry a lot and feel guilty. I see a counselor, take an anxiety pill and they are helping but any ideas as to what other things I can do to stay on path to recovery?

Answer 1

Sweetheart I have been there and done that.when my additions finally drew me into the gutter far enough .I wanted out. I was a two fifths of crown addict
when I awoke and realized I had lost everything wife kids home etc all I wanted at first was to die.Because I could not restore anything.
Well a wise old preacher found me and gave me some words to live by.
Son you can not change the past ,the best you can do is live one day at a time .
Before you can expect folks to accept you .You first must accept and forgive yourself.
Once you do that you can move on.
Always remember ,no matter how hard you try, you can never live up to their expatiation's.
[And this is what opened my eyes] For if you could have you would not have ended up where you are today.
The best of choices little sister.
And on a final note 4 years after I cleaned up I was able to face my family ask for their forgiveness and most did. for those who did not or would not they must live with their own bitterness. but the burden is off my shoulders for I sought them out .
And 10 years after I cleaned up I found true peace in Jesus Christ wish I had done that so much sooner but NOW he is mine.

Answer 2

I like lists too, sometimes they help to clarify things. The trouble is, you're using your past to beat yourself over the head repeatedly. You have to remember that things don't come from nowhere - the fact that you were a perfectionist in high school, probably led to you never feeling good enough and then to what happened later. What you think now, will influence future events. I have had a lot of experience with mental health issues in my family and the more you experience, the more you realize that problems are just symptoms of how you feel - they do not make you a bad person and they do not decide your future. You are still the same person you were 10 years ago, even if it feels like an eternity has passed.
You can't really think about the bigger picture like that either - otherwise you will feel overwhelmed and never achieve anything. Apologize to your family and then try to move on - you can't undo any of it, but you will make it worse if you wallow. You mentioned the pregnancies, but not whether you kept them - if you did, then that's a reason to hold on - and whether you did or not, you are still young enough to make a completely new start.
School is going to be daunting, but the first while will be the worst. I'm glad the medication is working , but you can't rely on it. Try joining support groups for those in a similar position - and join school groups - what are your interests? This is a time to look forward and be creative with your life. Make sure to exercise - happy hormones and all of that.
Try to be more positive, keep busy and try not to wallow - it's tough but you can do it. Good luck.

Answer 3

ONE DAY AT A TIME & sometimes just one minute to the next is how you deal with life without a "crutch". You must learn to crawl before you walk & you must be able to walk before you run & you must make many runs before you try to enter a marathon & many people will never get to a marathon, but that doesn't mean they can't walk or crawl across the finish line of life! You get there any way that feels comfortable & safe & you never look back on the things that happened in the past as "bad", because they happened for a reason that is not yet clear to you. You should try to be around other people who have gone through recovery & try to find a group where you can hear other peoples stories & you will learn a lot about this world we live in. It DOES get easier as time goes by & if your current counselor is not meeting your needs, there's no harm in finding another. Therapists & counselors are like mechanics...some can fix a flat,others can give your car a tune-up, some can re-build your engine, while others just want to take a new part out of the box & exchange it with the old one! Some wear gloves, while others don't mind getting their hands greasy...in other words...one person isn't going to fill all of your needs as you are getting to know you & the world without familiar habits that you have recently given up. You need healthier & safer replacements for those habits that caused you pain. As you start to forgive yourself, your daily life will feel less burdened by the so called "devastating" acts of your past. You are not alone in your anguish or your pain & if school is stressfull, you should consider taking a lighter class load & concentrating on therapy & counseling until you heal more. At least you lived to tell others about your struggles & that says a lot about your stamina & inner strength. You are on your way to a better life & you will learn who to trust this time around!

Answer 4

Reading this over I hear a very intelligent young woman who has a lot of answers, just needs some ongoing encouragement and support.

**Find a mentor... not a coach that you pay for, not some stranger on line, and not somebody from Narcon or AA or whatever... someone you really admire who is making a great success of their life (emotionally and socially-- it doesn't matter if they are wealthy or not). Ask them if you could hang out with them occasionally to see how they live and to pick up some tips. Just a couple of hours a week would be great. In 1950 it would have been your Auntie Alice, but we all know... Alice doesn't live here any more. Somebody from a Church? A former teacher? Your neighbor? A family friend of longstanding? This will take a lot of courage but believe it or not, most successful, grounded folks are thrilled to be asked... you will be too, someday, when you get your **** together and someone wants you as their mentor.
**Listen to the still quiet little voice within.... remove yourself periodically from the ratrace and do your journaling... again, nobody knows you better than you know you.
**Want to ramp up your recovery? Check out Emotional Freedom Techniques... this is an energy therapy, something like acupuncture without needles, that will help you get through any "psychological reversals" (the glitches that pop up as obstacles even though you really really want to change). It has really helped our family to be more peaceful, happy and healthily interactive (we're a 3-generational household). You can download the free Get Started Package at http://tinyurl.com/yh5zhu, or if you want to dive in right away by purchasing the inexpensive instructional DVDs click here>>http://tinyurl.com/ycwle8

I admire you for your search and wish you success on your journey!

Answer 5

You have to decide whether the addiction you experience now is better than the addiction you had before. Can you stand being addicted to the life of feeling lost, scared, lonely and discouraged and having to take responsibility for you own actions and getting ahead again is better than the addiction to the life of the loser you had before is better. Whether the constructive addiction is better than the devastating addiction you had before.

Answer 6

I was a drug addict and I'll explain some of the resources I found.
www.startingoversupportgroup.com, AA, NA any of those type groups, ask your counselor to name any self-help books you can read or work-on. Also ask your counselor if she can suggest any groups that she feels you might benefit from. I know its terrible, you have to change your whole life, but its worth it in the end.

Answer 7

i will permit ya understand ;) particularly, being a contemporary graduate of The Psych Ward (in-between getting "sliced & diced") -- Vicodin is a Narcotic and any Narc or Benzodiazapine (Valium, Xanax, and so on.) -- can doubtlessly depress your respiratory equipment adequate which you will DIE -- -- besides simply by fact the possibility of "lead-in" hallucinations (which, on an identical time as scarey, are actually not risky); and "altered" coherency. Taken by using path, one is many times "ok" -- although one has a tendency to construct-up a tolerance to them -- and there is the flair to start "boosting" your prescription, till severe problems, occurr. satirically -- chickening out from Narcs, Benzos, and different CNS painkillers & depressants -- isn't THAT risky. This includes Heroin (coated by using Narcs). chickening out is many times an undesirable adventure, yet very few have ever died from it !! the only "drug" that folk CAN die from Withdrawal, is (beleive it or no longer) -- ALCOHOL. greater issues can incorrect with your physique, with alcohol, than any drug.

Answer 8

You have a disease. You are not necessarily a bad person. Join a group of like addiction sufferers that support one another to refrain from destructive behavior. AA for alcoholics is considered the best treatment for that disease.

Answer 9

find some one that loves you such as family or a bo friend ant fall on them for support!Good Luck!

Answer 10

i say u do it all over again...