my girlfriend is 19 years old and she has a 2 year old son. I love my girlfriend more than anything, weve been dating for almost a year and a half now. Her son is so irritating though. Everytime she puts him down he cries. Hes constantly getting in our bed at night and laying on top of me which wakes me up. He always wants to be on my lap or something. I didnt really hate him until the other day when he called me daddy. It sounds sweet but it disgusted me !!!! We cant even have sex anymore without him interupting us !! I dont know what to do about it what do you think ?
2007-01-20 13:42:06 · 67 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
let's put things into perspective shall we?
you're jealous of a 2 year old...
really?
2007-01-20 13:45:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 3⤋
Dude,First of all the little boy is only 2. I have a son who is 4 and a little girl who is 2 and yea it is hard, But for you to say you hate someone who is so young and has no idea what he is doing. And for him to call you daddy that must mean he feels really close to you and that is better then any matreail thing in this world. I don't want to seem like I 'm really getting all in your bizz or you in mine. But I am married and before I got with my husben I already had a son from another man I was 16 when I got pregnet with my boy. Well then I got with my husbend now and this may sound really messed up but my husben now has been in my sons life as much as I have my aunt raised him from 3 months untill he was 18 months well any my point is that my son calls my husbend daddy and let me tell you they are so close I love it. His real dad is not around a whole lot and they have a song together it is by rodney adkins watching you it is a country song you should check it out. Another thing is my son knows to stay in his own bed also my 2 year old does to, onthat I can feel you, I don't like that either. the only time my kids get in the bed with us is if they are sick that is it so yes he should sleep in his own bed. And really that is my fav. time is when I cuddle alone no kids no nothing bothring us at night when we go to sleep. well I hope that you will get close with the little boy beause when he grows up and gets out of shool its you his daddy by heart that gets to enjoy knowing you played a really big part in him becomeing someone so smart. I will keep you in my prayers. And one more thing I'm only 22 and my husbend is 32 we have been married seince april 15 and we always talk to each other so i think that you should let your ol'lady know that you don't like the little one in the bed w/ you guys at night, ( i feel you on that one so does my husbend. one more thing you need tell tell your girlfriend tht she needs to stop spoiling him. He's 2 and if you put him down he cries thats not good. She need to put her foot down. sorry I am not trying to be mean.
2007-01-20 14:23:13 · answer #2 · answered by tonyad143 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is better that you leave soon. Why? Because you don't love her and for you can't stay the little boy and disgust you when he called you daddy. The bottom line of all these is that you are not ready for a relationship with a woman who has a child. And men like you (even women) who are in your same situation feels rejection towards the the children it is very dangerous. Because you wind up hurting the little boy. Some men are abusive and kill the babies or the children, women do the same thing. Don't hurt a innocent life, leave the mother and child soon for good. They are going to be safe and you don't have to go to jail.
2007-01-20 13:56:31 · answer #3 · answered by MayanPrincess@sbcgglobal.net 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Those are some horrible things to say. You might as well leave her now, before you make things worse for everyone. Your girlfriend has a child, which makes them a package deal. The little boy was there when you met her, so it's not like she was hiding it from you. You chose to get involved. You should consider yourself lucky that this child adores you and looks up to you, instead you hate him. That's just wrong. There are many ways to deal with this. I can understand that this is getting in the way of your intimate relationship, but you could talk to your girlfriend and get the child to sleep in his own room which is where he should be at this point anyway. Have you talked to her at all? And do you really hate him, of the lack of attention?
2007-01-20 13:50:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well to hate a child is just disturbing. But I know a few kids who irritate me though. When he calls you 'daddy' tell him ' my name is So and So, remember? A two year old will crawl in with mommy and she will or has tuned into your feeling toward her son. So try a little harder to open your eyes to a toddler, they have behaviors that need attention and most of all patience. Also have a chat with your gf about how you can make time for just the two of you. If you love her you will work your feelings into her life and schedule and if you can't do that then let them go before it gets too deep.
2007-01-20 13:50:13 · answer #5 · answered by djzlyric 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, first off the son is going nowhere... so either start making a effort to bond or get the hell out now!!! Kids all go through stages and if you can't handle 2 you'll never make it to 6. As far as the sneaking into your bed... deal with it, put a lock on the door.
My son was two when James and I started dating... that was 5 years ago... i made the smart move in not getting my son involved with my love life... they don't need to get attached to someone that won't be around forever... and when the kid calls you DAD just kindly correct him.
2007-01-20 13:55:21 · answer #6 · answered by sloangirl77 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Don't take your frustration out on the kid! Obviously the kid is becoming attacted to you. You are his father figure. You should sit down with your girlfriend and have some rules about him crawling on you and whatever else that it is that does to irritate you. The kid is just trying to show you affection in his own way. You will come to appreciate it later espeically if you ever decide to make something permanent with this lady.
Kid have a really good memory. Don't let him remember you as being the bad guy.
2007-01-20 13:54:14 · answer #7 · answered by Sandra C 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Alright, not to bash you, but you knew she had a son, so you're not dating her, she's no longer an individual, she's a family. It may be a phase that you're going through because you may not be ready to be a daddy and that is totally your choice.
You will have to give it time and see if you are ready for a son, even though he's not yours he is a part of your girlfriend. If you two get married, he will be your step son or adopted son (don't know all of your situation). If you can't adjust to it, it is best that you call it quits because your actions, behavior and attitude also affect this little boy who loves you very much.
Don't feel guilty if you can't adjust that is a huge part of your life. It is best to be honest to your girl and it will avoid any pain later.
2007-01-20 13:48:36 · answer #8 · answered by bridetobebrandie 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
if you don't like her son, then what are you doing with her, you've been with her for a year and half, and with this boy only being 2 years old, you are the only male figure in his life that he knows so of course he will assume you are the daddy figure to him. if he always wants to be on your lap that obviously means, he really likes you. As for him crying when she puts him down, HE IS SPOILED. You gotta put up with him crying so he won't think you will pick him up everytime he cries. GROW UP OR GET OUT, that's my advise to you.
2007-01-20 13:47:54 · answer #9 · answered by j_elmo28 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have to agree with many of the other posters here. If you aren't ready for kids, it's not fair to string her and her son along. You either need to break up with her and tell her that you just aren't ready for kids yet, or get into Dad mode.
That little guy sees you as his daddy. The fact that he crawls onto YOUR chest at night says how much he loves and trusts you. What an honor! You have the ability and opportunity to shape his life. If you're not ready, though, you'll be doing all of you a disservice.
Personally, I'd much rather a guy tell me he's not ready to deal with my two kids, than have him keep hanging around hating them.
2007-01-20 13:50:03 · answer #10 · answered by S. W 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You either need to learn to accept the son or get out of the situation. When you date a woman who has a child, you are getting a package deal. If you are just worried about getting involved with the child when you don't know if you'll have a future with the mom then you need to not be spending so much time at her house with the child.
Honestly, you need to grow up. The love of a child is one of the most beautiful and true things in the world. If you can't accept that this kids likes you, then you need to get out of the situation. Period.
2007-01-20 13:47:31 · answer #11 · answered by Justin H 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋