I've been going out with this guy for such a long time (we're seriously talking like weeks here!) He's a hopeless romantic, always taking me to surprise dinners at Applebees. We share everything, he even lets me use his toothbrush. I really think I'm falling for this guy! I've been through a lot of bad realtionships though, so I wondering if the only reason I love him id because I'm afraid of losing him. Am I losing myself to somebody else, or do I really love this man? I'm 21, so I have a whole life to live still ahead of me. Help me please! I don't want to lose him. Thank you.
2007-01-20 11:40:30 · 18 answers · asked by Tori C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you shouldnt be asking us if you love him you should be asking yourself
2007-01-20 11:43:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are saying that you've been going out with this guy for such a long time, but a couple weeks aren't a lot of time. If you're afraid of losing him then you need to ask yourself if you trust him to figure out the reason for fearing losing him. You shouldn't make yourself love him or pretend you do just so he won't leave you. You're a beautiful 21 year-old woman who has many possibilities left in your life.
2007-01-20 19:49:40 · answer #2 · answered by WIDE OUTxx0017 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try to stay with him for a while and see how you feel after 6 or 8 months. Then you will know better how you feel about the guy.
In my life I have met a lot of women who asked the same question and most of them decided to move on and find another guy only to come back after a couple of years saying that you were the one. Of course then it was too late.
What I am saying is that if you really like the guy and are having a great time don't let the many fish in the sea argument cloud your judgement. See the relationship for what it is. If it is a good thing then go for it!
2007-01-20 19:48:15 · answer #3 · answered by crpresents 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Lol such a long time huh? I don't think "weeks" qualifies.
It sounds like you have a really great guy there, and you should stick by him, but as for if you love him- your not viewing "love" correctly.
That warm fuzzy feeling you get isn't love, its infatutaion. Don't get me wrong, infatuation is great and should be in a relationship, but don't confuse it with love.
To love somebody means to sacrifice for them, to commit to them as much as you can. Can you say you would do anything for this man? Drive out to him in the middle of the night while its raining cuz his car broke down? Support him if (God forbid) his entire family suddenly died and he developed an alcohol addiction? Would you die for him?
Love is about service, not feelings. About putting his needs/wants above your own needs/wants.
Now like I said, don't break up with the guy. If you don't love him that's ok - its a big commitment. This guy is treating you right, so don't leave him or anything because the relationship isn't as serious yet as you think it should be.
2007-01-20 19:49:57 · answer #4 · answered by Chip 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, sometimes the euphoria wears off...people change or grow old of the same thing over and over. Not that he could be a someone completely not expected, but give it time and see what happens. Try not to fall too hard, or at least make it obvious until you know more for sure. I'm happy you found something like this, though. I've never found it.
2007-01-20 19:44:44 · answer #5 · answered by Chris C 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your relationship is doomed. Seriously. But enjoy it while it lasts. I know its cliche but . . . the candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long. You sound like a vibrant young lady and I'm sure you'll not have to worry about being alone.
2007-01-20 19:50:39 · answer #6 · answered by - 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are still doing things that you are enjoying and not just doing everything he wants. Then you are not loosing yourself. Just spend some time thinking about it. If you have had so many bad relationships, just take this one slow.
2007-01-20 19:45:13 · answer #7 · answered by Questionqueen 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just take it slowly. There's plenty of time to get to know each other and find out just how compatible you are. Don't worry too much about why you might like him... just focus on the fact that you DO like him. Good luck.
2007-01-20 19:45:27 · answer #8 · answered by doggiemom 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are afraid of losing the him because you are starting to feel something that you can't explain. For me,if you love him tell him what you feel.
2007-01-20 19:49:32 · answer #9 · answered by fashion_model 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Always step back and look at the guy and say "Do I really love him or do I love what he does for me?" And weeks are really not enough time for that big step trust me been there and done that!
Peace
2007-01-20 19:44:13 · answer #10 · answered by Elizabeth G 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're asking, a Majority of KIDS! To tell you how YOUR HEART feels. Don't listen to anyone else but yourself To Thine own self be true. The answer is in the Ticker. YOURS!!
2007-01-20 19:44:50 · answer #11 · answered by Goggles 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋