My father is not in my life. I have uncles but they also didn't not play an important role in my life. My brothers I love dearly but I really dont feel they should play the role of giving me away. It seems like a role deemed specifically for a father and since I don't have one I feel I should just walk on alone. This makes me a bit sad but that is how I feel. My family and friends feel that it is a bad idea and that I would look silly walking down the aisle alone and now I feel a bit insecure about doing it. Am I wrong? Is there a better way?
2007-01-20 10:56:00 · 28 answers · asked by Knowledge 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If you are an independent woman without a strong supportive male in your life (besides your husband to be) go for it! It is totally ok to walk alone. However, look at the people who matter most in your life. If your mom has always been there and supported you, have her walk you down the isle. If you have a close relationship to your brothers, have them walk you down. It is traditionally dad's job, but if he hasn't fulfilled the prerequisites to do this job, then you shouldn't have him do it. Have someone you love that loves you do it. But if you don't feel like anyone fills that role, then you just walk down that aisle, glowing, knowing that the one person who can fill that role is the one waiting at the end of the aisle for you.
2007-01-20 13:22:59 · answer #1 · answered by Krystle B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I walked myself down the aisle. My dad and step father were both at the wedding. I was 27 when I married. Already on my own for a long time and I had no problem walking myself down the aisle. I didn't feel silly or sad that I didn't have anyone to give me away. I too have uncles and such thought long and hard about what I wanted to do. Your mother could also give you away or a sister? It's OK to break tradition to do what feels good for you.
2007-01-20 12:09:06 · answer #2 · answered by hollyberry 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actually, escorting you down the aisle and giving you away are two different things. ANYONE you like can walk you down the aisle, but the person who gives you away should be someone who is a parent or who is somewhat like a parent to you.
If you want to walk alone, that is perfectly fine. You just might feel extra nervous.
Your mom can do it-- it's not just for males.
What about Godparents? Grandparents?
Some people walk the aisle with their maid of honor, or some even with their groom.
2007-01-20 11:24:31 · answer #3 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have known someone to walk sown the aisle with an older gentleman that was a close family friend. She had similar father issues and didn't want to go it alone. The whole purpose of the father walking down the aisle is to give his daughter to a man he trusts to take care of her. Who is your main protector, other than your soon to be hubby? Man or woman, old or young, that person is the symbol you should represent. Don't do it alone. It is a meaningful part of the ceremony.
2007-01-20 11:07:52 · answer #4 · answered by peppersagooddog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to have anyone walk you down the aisle unless you feel good about the whole thing. I used to work a lot of weddings and, trust me, lots walk the aisle unescorted.
Maybe you could have the brothers do it, walk with one halfway and have the other take over for the remainder. You have many options, but do what you feel most comfortable with, it is your day, not your relatives'.
2007-01-20 11:05:01 · answer #5 · answered by jeffpsd 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay sweetie, I recently married as well and did have my dad. However, in all honesty my mom is and always has been my rock. Nothing taken from my dad b/c he was there as well but the bond with my mom was alot stronger. They are going to ask who gives you away during the ceremony and it will be your mom who stands anyway so give her the honor of giving her baby who she carried nine months away. You said that you were going to walk alone; for what, when you did not come into this world on your own.Think of it on this level, she was attached to you and shared her organs with you so you could be here today to get married. She protected you in the womb as well as out of the womb. So who deserves to give you a way but her. That is a big day for her as well. She watched you grow into the woman that you are today. So dont feel bad at all, you have someone very special to give you away. Someone who really can be compared to no one else. It holds true on that had it not been for God placing you in her, your future husband would not have you so she is your beginning and since its come to an end in a sense let her close that chapter of your life with you in that way so that you can begin to write a new chapter with your hubby to be. Stay blessed! Prayers are with you. Make sure you enjoy that day it goes by fast.
2007-01-20 12:45:44 · answer #6 · answered by shay80800 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is so wrong to walk down the aisle alone. If you feel that's what's best for you, then go for it. I have thought about it too, for my upcoming wedding, and I think it just shows some independence. Plus, it gives you the attention you deserve on your big day. Congrats and good luck!
2007-01-20 11:14:43 · answer #7 · answered by Kala 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right in that fathers usually take responsibility of walking down their daughters in weddings. And it's absolutely normal for you to feel the way you do.
You may want to find someone in your family who every one of your family members respect and have that person walk you down the aisle.
2007-01-20 11:02:40 · answer #8 · answered by Andy L 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are saddened by the thought of walking alone, then don't! The idea is that you are moving from your family to becoming a member of a new family - that of you and your husband.
Don't let everyone else dictate what you do - if you'd be happier walking with a brother (or all of them!) then walk with them. If you'd be happier alone, walk alone. Think about it for a couple of days, make a decision and don't look back with regret.
Congrats on your upcoming marriage!
2007-01-20 11:05:20 · answer #9 · answered by Leia 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your oldest brother that is the emotionally closest to you should give you away. A brother is more appropriate than an uncle. If not, then a best guy friend that is non-threatening to your fiance. Even a sister. you didn't mention your mother. if your mother is alive and can walk or roll then she should be the one to give you away. what about your grandfather?
bottom line, nobody is giving you away, it's just a tradition and the person really just needs to be someone supportive, it can even be you maid or matron of honor
2007-01-20 11:03:18 · answer #10 · answered by Hank Hill 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋