am I getting greedy?

Question

I got engaged in june, my ring is so small, I find myself looking at other women's rings all the time, I want a bigger ring, I don't even care if its fake, the one my husband got me is real, but very small, I want a big one. how do I tell him without hurting his feelings?

I just want a bigger ring I would rather have a FAKE bigger one then a real small one

Answer 1

Who cares! Don't worry about the size of the ring, mine was what my hubby could get. The engagement was over the top, and the story alone was so different from everyone else that the ring didn't matter. He spent weeks trying to pick out the perfect one. Just be happy with what you have, maybe 5 or 10 years down the line you'll get a different one for your anniversary. Save the $$ for a down payment on a house.

Answer 2

How do you tell him without hurting his feelings? You can't. And in my observations, word gets out when a woman does ask (he'll mention it to someone, who tells someone else...), and the next thing you know, she is seen by everyone as superficial at best, and usually greedy and manipulative. I'm not saying that this is true of you, but perception is important.
I can also say that although I bought my wife a nice ring, I still occasionally look at other women's rings and wonder if I could have done better (especially when I think in terms of my current salary...) -- I think it's just human nature to want more and better things for ourselves and those we love.
After a few years and a few kids, you will have better perspective on what's really important; at that point, I doubt the ring will make your "top 10" list!
And as other answerers have said, you can always get the ring redone later if it still concerns you, perhaps turning the original stone into an accent stone for a huge rock!

Answer 3

yes you do sound greedy...you accepted his proposal and ring. when you pick out a band get a ring jacket to dress it up but really why are you worried about it. Do you love the guy or are you worried about what other people think?You can't tell him without hurting his feelings ...he picked out what he could afford. on the other hand maybe you should say something so he has a better idea of what he is getting into. I had no engagement ring just a wedding band for 25 years then for my anniversary I was given a beautiful 3 caret ring.

Answer 4

I know how you feel. Don't get me wrong, I love my ring. But my best friend has a large, elaborate ring, and everytime I look at it, I want one. I think that's normal. But you really shouldn't ask for a bigger one. Just remember that someone else is looking at your ring and envying it. Doesn't it have something special? Just cherish it for what it is, and besides, someday (when you two are more financially stable) you can get a bigger one. People do that all the time. My grandpa buys my grandma a new one every ten years.

Answer 5

While I hesitate to define you as a greedy person overall, I think you're getting off track about what that piece of jewelry is. It is a token. A momento of the moment he proposed. It need not be the only ring or the biggest ring you wear. In and of itself it is special.

Buy yourself a nice ring and wear it on your right hand- or choose a wedding ring in a wrap style that will enhance the engagement ring. Do NOT, under any circumstances let on that you are anything less than thrilled with the gift he gave you to commemorate that joyous instant.

Answer 6

You aren't greedy, you're honest. Are there any old rings from moms, grnadmoms, etc...in either of your houses that are larger than your ring? Ask him if he would mind if you wore that ring instead, in honor of that person (you woldn't even have to explain why...). If all else fails, tell him you really like the ring he chose, but you don't think it looks quite right on your hand, and you'd really like to "change it" a little before the wedding. Of course, if money is an issue, you'd better be prepared to shell out some of your own. I didn't get a bigger stone, but I got a better stone - because the 1st diamond had an obvious shoadow in it...the $500 more we (I) spent have been well worth it. Its only a half carat, but it looks bigger and it is a pretty stone. Also, a single stone by itself looks bigger than a bunch of little stones with a "big" stone. Or, I have seen like four little stones put together to look like a bigger stone - but I have told my husband time and time again that I'd rather one big stone than a 100 little ones... Once you're married start training him! lol Good luck!

Answer 7

Your not really greedy.. Women are always comparing their engagement rings.. What you can do is when you go to pick out your rings, just get a wedding set for yourself, and a ring for him. My engagement ring diamond was small too, I didn't want bigger, but when we picked out our rings I got a matching set and my diamond was bigger.. It works out for me in the end because it's beautiful! Good Luck and Best wishes!

Answer 8

I hate to say it, but I found myself in the same situation. My fiancee and I couldn't afford a big diamond and so I got a 1/2 carat 3-stone ring. At first, I loved it, but now I've seen other women's rings and even my fiancee has said that mine looks small in comparison. Since we can't afford a large diamond, I asked him for a diamond and sapphire ring that I could alternate with my engagement ring. I found a vintage sapphire ring on ebay for around $230. The stone is a good size and there are diamonds on the side. Plus, what I really love about it is that it's from the 1950's (my fiancee and I are planning a retro themed wedding).

If you want a larger stone, try a different gemstone. A lot of women do it - either because they like a different stone's appearance, don't want to support the diamond trade, or want something that's more affordable.

Vintage gemstone rings are especially unique because they have history and you can bet that no one has the same one.

I bought my ring from ringsgalore on Ebay because they have a good reputation and a nice selection. I especially like these rings:

http://cgi.ebay.com/MAGNIFICENT-VINTAGE-SAPPHIRE-SOLITAIRE-DIAMOND-RING-NR_W0QQitemZ250073653474QQihZ015QQcategoryZ67727QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

http://cgi.ebay.com/GORGEOUS-VINTAGE-18KT-FILIGREE-SAPPHIRE-DIAMOND-RING-NR_W0QQitemZ250075211996QQihZ015QQcategoryZ67727QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

The good thing about sapphire is that it's a durable stone so it will last for years to come.

Answer 9

wedding ring is very important thing, but not more important than being with someone who really loves and cares about you, if he have lots of money and got u a small ring, then you can talk 2him about it, but if this is what he can afford then it is OK, you should be proud with whatever ring he gives you, there are always bigger rings, bigger houses, better cars, if you think this way you will never be satisfied and happy, i have many friends and family members who got extremely expensive rings but some of them are not happy as a couple as i am,,,,,, so be happy with what you got, and if you want to be materialistic then marry someone who can afford that....

Answer 10

You don't tell him. It is really rude of you to even be contemplating this, and having it on your mind. It's not greedy; it's terribly unfeeling and disrespectful towards him. You will totally hurt him if you do this. If you want a BIG ring, since it is important to you, just go buy yourself a ring, any kind dress ring, as long as it is BIG. Enjoy it.