I have been married three years. For the last year and a half, my marriage has been through hell. My husband treats me like a slave, resents me when I ask him to take me out, and is a slob. When he comes home from work, he goes to the computer room and logs onto an online game. He does this until he has to go to bed. If I ask him for a favor, he acts like its the worse thing in the world. I cant drive, I'm medically unable, so I'm dependent on him to get me to where I need to go. I feel like I'm less than a woman around him. He treats me like I'm stupid, which I'm not. I'm tired of being neglicted and having to deal with his games, and his slob self. I want to leave him, but I'm not sure if I should. Family says this is "normal", that things will get better, but it seems things are going worse. I feel I'm begging to die b/c I know its probably the only way he will pay attention to me. I'm lost and confused.
2007-01-20 02:36:29 · 8 answers · asked by Tiger Jae 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Family telling you that things will get better ----possibly.
Tells you that it is normal-----negative!!! No way this is normal and no way you deseurve to be treated this way. Talk to him about this. I am not sure what disability you have but at the moment i know you dont need noone to feel sorry for you, but the only way it will work if you stay sincere with him and make him feel guilty and sorry. Why stay in a marriage is he is neglecting you and he dont even help you out and support you. What kind of man that loves his wife will ever treat her like that? Maybe he dont love you anymore, maybe still do but tired of everything, i dont know but you need to talk to him asap. I do not suggest to settle this. Dont bend for him, demand yours and be specific. If he dont like it then leave. If he loves you he will run after you and call you everyday and beg you to come back. Now its up to you to take that step and set yourself in a position where you cant posibly predict whether you walkin out of his life or at least threatening will make him run after you or not. Its 50/50 chance. Up to you if you want to take that risk for yourself and your own happiness.
2007-01-20 02:48:08 · answer #1 · answered by BK thang 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband came home from work every day, piled up on the recliner, and slept or watched tv until the next morning when it was time to go to work again. He never talked to me, listened to me, went anywhere with me, did anything with me, nor did one thing around the house, while I did it all and held down a full-time job. If I suggested he go somewhere or do something with me, help me, or tried to talk to him, he snapped my head off. My love for him simply died after 17 years of marriage. I'm so much more content now, and relieved, even though he swore he loved me and would change when I told him I wanted a divorce. It was too little too late. There's help out there for people who can't drive. You deserve better than this.
2007-01-20 10:52:37 · answer #2 · answered by telaine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally, people give a pretty clear indication of the type of person they are after a few months. Either you ignored the signs or you didn't care. So, much as I sympathize, you must accept partial blame for poor judgment. But that's not going to solve your problem. If the relationship is not satisfying, then, the best thing to do is to make a graceful exit (even if it means starving) before other things like children complicate matters. If you choose to hang around, then accept him for what he is.
2007-01-20 10:53:51 · answer #3 · answered by pepper 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have u ever heard of spousal abuse? You may feel like death is the only answer but there are better ways to get attentiion. I don't know what your medical condition is but you have to find a way to get out of the house and let people know whats going on in your home. Beatings are not the only form of spousal abuse, if he makes you feel this way then he is guilty of emotional abuse which is sometimes worse than a cuff upside the head. Get out now before he really makes you lose your spirit!!!PLEASE
2007-01-20 10:53:38 · answer #4 · answered by Katy 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is definitely not a normal or healthy situation. Unless forced to do so your husband will not change. Try to see if you can get him to go to marriage counseling, and whether he does or not get yourself into a domestic violence support group, such as Prudence Crandell. Abuse is not always physical. They will help you see the situation for what it really is. Then you can determine for yourself what is the right course of action for you to take.
2007-01-20 10:52:23 · answer #5 · answered by w2kaad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what you need to do is focus on yourself, not him. i have no idea why he treats you this way and neither do you. but the first thing you should do is get into yoga and meditation. words of affirmation helped me put my life into perspective. you will die soon enough without wishing to die now. you were not put on this earth just to be married. everyone is here for a reason. you must find this out, and one way to do it is thru meditation.
2007-01-20 11:04:11 · answer #6 · answered by LENA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him...things are not going to get better. You deserve better. Obviously, he thinks you are a burden, so unburden his load and your own.
2007-01-20 10:39:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
DIVORCE!!!
2007-01-20 10:45:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋